doulas etc please help....doc wants to do internal to see if i am capable of giving birth????

[blueberrysorbet]

hi there
doc has guesstimated with scan the weight of my baby due in 2 weeks will be about 4.5 kg (its 3.8now at 37.5weeks) my ds1 was 4.7kg and born via cs.

he wanted to give me an internal to measure my pelvis and see if i am physically capable of giving birth to a baby of this size. he said it will be pointless labouring and then having cs.
i got very upset as i have told him 4 times now how internals distress me and i must say i have never heard of such an examination??

please can anyone help me, how can an internal tell him if i can have a big baby? why can't he measure with the ultrasound?

he says if i won;t consent to an internal now or if i go into labour i will have a cs.

what bollox.

Why was your first child cs?

are you in the uk?

(not a mw/or doula but sounds bizarre to me)

nobody can force you to have a cs

You do not have to consent to anything you don't want to, inc a cs. They can advise and you can decide.

He sounds like a totally insensitive prat, change consultants.

i am in the middle east. its a bit late for me to change now as they are either full or won;t see me as i bled so badly last time.

i had a cs last time in the UK as i was really itchy from about 28 weeks and mw said all women itched. it got so bad i phoned the hospital at 40 weeks -it was a sunday- and they said come in for blood test. turned out i had had cholestatis. they tried to induce me as said baby could be still born if not. drugs had no effect and ended up having c section. was huge at 38 weeks and same midwife said she had 30 years experience, i was being ridiculous at my concerns baby was HUGE and i would have a tiny baby!

have been looking it up and its a procdure called pelvimetry that used to be popular 30 years ago. am so worried and keep crying all the time.

My mum had it 30 years ago but I always thought it was a load of bollocks. Have not heard of it since sorry not to be more positive. Please try to focus on your bubba and the end reward if you are not in a position to find another dr and have to go through this process....

This sounds barbaric! You are in charge of how you give birth - NOT this doctor - it is your body and your baby. It may be medically necessary for you to have a c-section - or it may not - his job is to give you all the information and provide you with care - not to tell you what you must submit to. Has your husband been coming to your appointments with you? If not - I think he should and I think you should write down what you hope for your birth and try and discuss it with him?

As far as the whole measuring thing goes - I believe it is very unusual for a woman to grow a baby too big to fit through her pelvis - it does happen but more often it's other positional factors over and above sheer size that mean things don't click. As those factors only become apparent when you're labouring saying whether your pelvis is measuring big enough (according to him) at this point is pointless.

tess, i am NOT letting this exam happen to me, he is about 50 so clearly its something he does. he knows i am terrified of internals, and need g&a to help me. he requested a high vaginal swab the week before and i said NO )found out later he wanted to test for strep b) and didn't mention this test then.

what i am going to do, except i can't stop crying. i can't bear him now and am so scared of what he might do to me during a cs.

northernlurker, my dh does come but he is not a doctor and does;t really know what to say.

also am only allowed to be in labour for a certain amount of hours (8-10) before they perform a c section.
have been reading about it online and it seems a pointless examination to me and very painful as well.

bloody hell, can't you hire an im and stay at home?