Anyone felt this way?

[nicsnigsnags]

I have recently given birth to a dd 19 days ago

she is my second dc, have ds nearly 4

I just feel really sad that I'm not going to be pregnant again even though I had a terrible pregnancy this time

we won't have anymore dc and although this is the most sensible thing has anyone felt like this?

I am also having to give up trying to re-establish breastfeeding with my dd due to having to take painkillers for gallstones that were discovered in pregnancy and are causing me loads of pain so feel guilty/upset about that, didn't bf ds so felt this was my last chance to get it right iyswim

I just don't understand why I feel like this as I had such a hard time in pregnancy but was back at the hospital I delivered at last week to see physio as I had major pelvis problems as well and felt like I was going to cry knowing I won't be there again when pregnant

I'd love to hear from anyone who has had similar feelings so I know I'm not losing it, (did actually cry in front of physio

Sorry, didn't want to read and run - what painkillers are you on? You may be able to bf on them, if you still want to, or there might be another painkiller you can take which is safe. If you pop over to the breast/bottlefeeding board, someone will know the list of medications (I don't know the link - I just know that most doctors aren't trained in breastfeeding and they tend to err on the side of caution and recommend stopping bf if they are not sure). Also, look what good you've done her already: Reasons to be Proud.

It will be okay I think actually it's fairly nomal to feel like this. Give yourself a break and a great big hug, you only gave birth less than 3 weeks ago!

I think this is normal. Not only do you have a huge amount of hormones in your body telling you that the most important thing is babies, but you 'know' that you are not planning any more so you sort of grief for the possibilities that could have been.

I never got particularly broody before I was pregnant with either of my two, but having agreed that we would have no more, I felt the same as you.

Within a few weeks of giving birth (traumatic in itself) I was broody and it has not gone away.

Just the irony of head versus hormones I suppose!

Thank cherry, it's dihydrocodeine, already tried to get some advice from Le Leche and basically they cannot say it's safe as they just don't know

I tried to start bf in hospital but had no confidence due to failing with my son and all the staff were really busy so I gave up

Hated the fact I gave up so easily and decided to try and re-establish but then my gp phoned to say it probably wasn't a good idea due to taking the painkillers

I got more info but as I was just trying to start again feel I'm just messing her about as if I wanted to continue I couldn't feed her until 4 hours after taking it

wanted to try and get her off formula but that's not going to happen so feel like I'm confusing her, in my heart I want to keep going but maybe thats for my benefit rather than dd

I need to take these tablets as the pain is severe, going to see surgeon on Monday to find out when it will be getting operated on, just wish I could have fed her myself

thank you for responding

thanks bigteuchlittleteuch

glad I'm not the only one

I was the same as you not broody at all before they were born

I hope it does go away! or at least the irrational crying at everything

OP, I've been on diclofenac twice while bfeeding - is this an option you could explore? I don't know if it is a powerful-enough painkiller for you, as my DH has had gallstones and I know how excruciating they are. I had the painkillers for cs recovery, and for joint inflammation.

thanks poledra

not sure if they would be strong enough, even the dihydrocodeine doesn't get rid of the pain

was in hospital for 9 days at 31 weeks with pain getting pethedine and morphine injections

worth exploring, thanks for responding, I appreciate it

nicsnigsnags

Hi Hun-- It sounds like your having a bit of a rough time hun.
I'm due my 3rd section in 3 weeks and we have decided that it will be the last and am being sterilised at the same time- Like you know its the right choice for us I've had horrendous SPD and can't face it again but saying that I do worry about my feelings after the op, and it will ruin those first few moments.

What you have to remember is that your a good mum and you are doing the right thing by your kids. Its great your trying to BF but if it doesn't work then you are not a failure I didn't cope with my DD she hasn't got any signs of suffering, because she didn't breastfeed at nearly 8 she finds the whole thing gross!!! Bless her.

Make sure you get your HVs, GP and friends and family to support you!!

And remember, as already said-- your a fab mum and you are not a failure!!

Perhaps pop into a pharmacy and they can tell you whether your painkillers are suitable in BF and point you in the right directions to the ones that are xx
Big hugs xxxxx

thanks for your post Effielou

sorry to hear you've had SPD, hope all goes well for you and you feel ok afterwards

I'm sure you will enjoy your new baby and I hope your SPD settles down

Guess I am being hard on myself but can't help it, am hoping things get better soon and I feel better in myself, terrible thing hormones!