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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Come and tell me how to deal with these work problems...

31 replies

PrammyMammy · 12/05/2009 15:39

Hello,

Well i work in a busy cafe/coffee shop serving customers from 10am till 5.30pm Mon, Tues and Wed.
I am on my feet constantly, except for during my two 15 minute breaks that i have during the day which are spend in the staff room, which is under the center - down a large set of stairs- the 15 minutes are strict, and any longer (even 2-3 mins) are pointed out by the manager.
Anyway!
The past week or so i have been having horrrible pains in my pelvis, back and hips. When i say horrible, i mean that i can hardly walk ten minutes, taking the stares takes me twice as long and getting in and out of the bath requires dps help. I am only 22 weeks pg, and never had anything at all like this when i was carrying ds.
So anyway! My work is quite strict and the manager knows exactly how she likes things. I am 22 weeks pg, and she still hasn't done a risk assessment. I have to stack chairs and lift heavy trays and pots of food and am always on the go. But with these pains im having i just can't do it.
Today i had to hold myself up on the worktop and she really wasn't happy, but i could hardly walk. She wasn't happy with the leaning, i said i couldn't stand any longer and needed to go see a doctor - which i wouldnt be able to do until Thursday. She said it wasn't okay with her, but if i want to go then i was to go.
Soo, i left, and called the docs, but can't be seen till tomorrow. When i called to let her know, she said 'So i take it you wont be in tomorrow then, call after your appointment."

I am in pain, the front of my pelvis is throbbing just now and i feel so angry because i am always reliable and hard working. Smokers can go have a break for a smoke when it is quiet, but i can't even have a seat when i am in pain. I have 2 x 15mins to rush down and back up a flight of stairs and sit and watch the clock because they are doing the same on the floor.

That is my rant! Thank you for MN eh. What can i do?

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slushy06 · 12/05/2009 15:44

Tell all this to the doctor do not walk out of work I was in a similar situation working in a busy nightclub. I walked out and got m.a instead of maternity pay but they have no right to treat you like this.

rookiemater · 12/05/2009 15:46

Poor you sounds like a horrible situation.

Firstly yes take tomorrow off, it sounds as though you are in pain. Secondly see what the doctor says, dependant on the outcome perhaps you can get him/her to write a letter recommending maximum length of time you should be standing and some other suggestions. At the end of the day your health is what comes first and if she is not sensible enough to recognise the genuine concerns of a worker then she has a lot to learn, plus not having your risk assessment done is not on.

Hope your doctor is sympathetic and you get things sorted out.

Original poster

PrammyMammy · 12/05/2009 15:55

She told me yesterday i will need a letter from my GP proving i am pg so she can do my risk assessment.

OP posts:

ruddynorah · 12/05/2009 15:56

is there anyone else you can speak to other than your manager? is the cafe part of a big retailer or just on its own? are there any other less manual jobs you could do? maybe stay on the till or something? without knowing the set up it's quite difficult to suggest.

you always have the option of having your doctor sign you off for a couple of weeks anyway. he may suggest this as part of his diagnosis. could it be spd?

ruddynorah · 12/05/2009 15:57

so you know where you stand

rookiemater · 12/05/2009 15:58

OMG She needs a letter from your GP to prove you are pregnant, can't she take your word for it ?

Original poster

PrammyMammy · 12/05/2009 16:02

Yes, it is part of a large chain, a bakery called Mathisons - i think they are mainly in Scotland. My branch is a Cafe in a shopping center. Yeah there is a till, but one person gets this job. the same lady every day - like i am on the food part every day, some people are moved around though.
I don't know who else i could speak to though. But she doesn't want to help.

I don't know what it can be, sometimes i can't even walk and i have to stop and find somewhere to lean on if i am out. Hopefully the doctor will have some answers tomorrow though.

OP posts:

Original poster

PrammyMammy · 12/05/2009 16:04

She has seen my scan photos with dates/times and my name on them. And she tells me how huge i am getting most days too.

OP posts:

Original poster

PrammyMammy · 12/05/2009 16:07

thanks for that link norah, i'm off to read.

OP posts:

Directskiandsun · 12/05/2009 16:29

If it's a large chain, there should be a HR department (Human Resources/personnel) - when you've read the link, see what current advice is about your entitlements/rights, and then approach the HR department. You've tried line management,by the sound of things, and they are not interested, so you may need to take it higher. Good luck - let us know

summerbird · 12/05/2009 16:50

It sounds like you have SPD go here which can be quite serious if not dealt with properly, I know someone who is on crutches at the end of her pregnancy because of it.

I dont say this to scare you, just to make sure you take tomorrow off and go to the docs. Do not let this manager get away with it, i echo the other posters points about going to HR and reading up on your rights. They can also not give you any sickness warnings if you are off for a pregnancy related illness.

Look after yourself

booyhoo · 12/05/2009 18:07

your GP will be able to give you a MATB1 certificate. this is what you will need to send to your HR department anyway to enable them to pay you SMP, you can show that to your line manager. a risk assesment needs to be carried out and i would ask your gp if he/she can make the recomendations in writing that rookiemater suggests. i too am suffering quite bad back and hip pain and i am already on mat leave. i think your line manager is being very unreasonable. that is a very long time for you to be on your feet while pregnant. explain it all to gp as you have in your post. you shouldnt have to suffer like this. good luck and dont be afraid to go over your line managers head if she remains unco-operative.

Original poster

PrammyMammy · 12/05/2009 20:13

Thanks for the 2nd link, a few people have mentioned that, but i can open my legs, and don't feel any pain while doing it unless i'm lying on my back.And the pain isn't constant, like it gets worse throughout the day and after i have a rest/lye down it isn't as bad. Hopefully my gp will be able to help me a bit tomorrow.
The work thing is stressing me out though, it feels like my manager expects me to be super human or something. She even said 'Maggy and Emma didn't have any problems when they were pregnant and both managed to work right up until they were due' as if i am not as good as them and don't have the right to have any problems.
I feel horrible that when i am at home i am resting and not playing and running around with my toddler, but when i am at work i am trying so hard not upset my manager who just expects me to grin and bare it. sniffs

OP posts:

rookiemater · 12/05/2009 20:34

It's really hard not being 100% if you are dedicated, I should know, i'm currently signed off due to the side effects of medication. But it took me far too long to recognise I needed to do that.

Your manager sounds like she runs a tight ship but needs to learn the basics about supporting people. You do have rights and she can say what she likes, but you can't help how you feel.

I do hope your GP will be sympathetic.

tigger15 · 12/05/2009 21:27

Try posting this in the employment section there are a couple of HR people and lawyers who can help you work out the best way to handle this from a legal and practical perspective.

summerbird · 12/05/2009 23:12

i want to slap your manager!

Hawkmoth · 13/05/2009 09:50

Definitely sounds like SPD to me. Mine gets worse during the day.

When I worked for a big employer they fell over themselves to do a risk assessment as soon as I told them. Even in my small office now I've had a new chair and don't have to make brews anymore ;)

It's unnacceptable how they are treating you, and I hope you manage to get some support and advice from your GP. Remember you can be paid for any medical appointments due to pregnancy, so watch your manager for marking the time as sick leave.

Physio (hospital obsetric physio) has been a lifesave for me this time. Good luck.

Original poster

PrammyMammy · 13/05/2009 12:34

Hey,
I saw my gp today, who said that it is common pregnancy pains.
When i asked her if it is common to sometimes not be able to take another step, she said yes. I have to see someone else tomorrow to get some excersises to strengthen my muscles or something.
She didn't give me a line or anything and said i was to ask for a seat at work, and when i said i had already asked that and was told no, she just nodded her head!
Ahh it is rubbish.

OP posts:

Hawkmoth · 13/05/2009 13:40

Useful GP! It is quite common... but it's far from normal.

The exercises I've been given have really helped, I hope it's the same for you. My NHS physio also realigns the joint(s) for me, which is great.

Look at www.pelvicpartnership.org.uk It's a very helpful site.

Directskiandsun · 13/05/2009 18:01

That sounds like you've been fobbed off. Do you visit the midwife at the surgery or hospital? If so, I'd ask her advice sooner, rather than later, making sure she understands the level of pain you are in, the type of work you do, and lack of support or reasonable steps to assist you within work.

Original poster

PrammyMammy · 13/05/2009 22:12

It is the midwife at the surgery i see, i have made an appointment to see her tomorrow anyway.
Tonight again though i couldn't move, i was in the shower and i yawned and was just stuck there mid yawn in total pain, and since then i've been in agony, just walking through to the living room felt like my bones were grinding together and throbbing.
Dp isn't even in and i'll need to take the dog downstairs before i go to bed, but i'm scared to move. I know it can't be normal to feel like this.

Hawkmoth, thank youfor that website, i am going to read the now. How does the physio realign the joints? Do you feel better after it?

OP posts:

Hawkmoth · 14/05/2009 11:34

The relaignment is by stretching then putting pressure on the joint. She's done my SI joints and the joint at the front of the pelvis. It's unpleasant when it happens, and for me at least, puts me in a lot of pain for a few hours afterwards... I guess it's the inflammation and the joints resettling in a new position. BUT, I get up to a week of relief every time before it starts creeping up on me again. Of course, if I do too much it hurts sooner, this last one only lasted two days because I took a fast twenty minute walk.

The grinding sounds how I was at my worst last time, but even then the physio helped... though I was signed off work and stopped doing EVERYTHING.

summerbird · 14/05/2009 13:25

good god prammy i am so annoyed for you. speak to the midwife and then consider taking legal action against your boss, she sounds like such a cow.

{blush} summerbird getting over emotional again! it just winds me up when others have no sympathy, ok so we are not disabled but we do need to take it much easier.

Original poster

PrammyMammy · 14/05/2009 14:43

Hey,
Ahh that sounds scary hawkmoth, but sooo worth it! I am so glad there are ways to ease the pain. My midwife said today that they might give me crutches.
I'm just back from seeing my midwife. She was so lovely. She has referred me to see a physio at the hospital first thing tomorrow morning and said what my boss is doing sounds like harrasment. She also said i should see what the physio says tomorrow and my gp will probably sign me off work.
So i feel sooo much better today.

OP posts:

Directskiandsun · 14/05/2009 17:36

That sounds more like it! Well done for pursuing it, and push to be signed off. Good luck

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