Has anybody been really stressed in pregnancy but all been well?

[cba]

I am 20 weeks pregnant with number 4 and stressed all the time. I am not sleeping properly or eating properly.

The stress is due to severe financial worries and although dh reassures me everything is going to be ok, I cannot relax.

I am not starting to worry that the baby will come to harm.

So anyone been really stress in pregnancy but all turned out well with the birth.

I was really stressed with my second pregnancy and I worried myself silly thinking it was going to affect my baby .

Our first son died at 14mths and so we really felt like we were trying our luck daring to do this again .

My neighbour had a massive breakdown which meant unbelievable noise and annoyance for months .

My much loved bil also died during my pregnancy and I spent nearly two months of the pregnancy driving 50 mile round trip to see him most days .

My gorgeous boy is now 5 and an absolute joy .

YES. I can actually reassure you on this. I was doing my PGCE, DP lost his job, my hours got cut to part time and we lost our home and moved in with my parents who are lovely but so hard to live with lol. Had all kinds of rows, depression, etc.

But now have an amazing little boy and everything sorted itself out in the end- we bought a lovlier house and both got better jobs.

Don't worry, it will all be ok, and don't worry about worrying.

I can't think why anyone wouldn't be stressed in pregnancy and especially someone as experienced as yourself - you know all the hard bits.

Do you have any reason to suspect something is wrong or is it just the money worries? I did worry more with number 2 but he was fine in the end.

travellingwilbury - sorry to hear about your son, my friend went through a similar situation and also went on to have another healthy child.

I was about to say I was mega stressed when I was pg but with problems no where near as bad as travellingwillbury and totallyandutterly... however I was terribly stressed through work. DS is super chilled and really easy going. He's a real joker too. I put that down to all the chocolate I ate. I read in an NCT mag that there was some evidence that if women eat lots of chocolate during pregnancy they were more likely to have a happy baby... I was eating a bar a day by the end

oh thanks ladies. I cannnot just chill as dh keeps telling me. We have major money issues at the moment and I just cannot switch off from that.

Feel really useless as well because I gave my career up when ds1 was born 8.6 years ago. Really wished I had gone part time now as at least I could contribute.

There is no way an employer would take me on being 20 weeks pregnant, anyway my skills would need refreshing.

I felt similar concerns in this pregnancy as I have been through great stresses because of it. My partner left me and I was turfed out of my home with 3 DC. I have financial worries and day to day responsibility for 3 children which is no easy task in itself.

However, I should know from past experience that the baby can and will weather these storms. My mother had a serious accident and had brain damage when I was 8/9 months pregnant with my first child and the stress then was unbelievable with peaks of panic and fear at certain times when waiting to see if she'd survive operations, followed by the stress of watching and trying to help her rehabilitation. All turned out well for me in that pregnancy.

My third pregnancy was also stressful as my ExDP went missing several times and took an overdose and was hospitalised.

I hope this all provides you with some reassurrance.

travelling, can I just say that I am so sorry about your son. There is nothing more stressful than that. I cannot imagine what you went through.

cba , does your dp actually talk to you about the money worries or do you feel like you are being patted on the head and told "not to worry your pretty little head" ?

Not literally I am sure but I know that when I am pregnant , I have had another ds since that pregnancy my dh does try and protect me from anything he thinks might upset me . It made things worse because what was going on in my mind was always much worse than the hidden reality .

Thank you wmmc and cba .

Headfairy I reckon chocolate got me through as well

That and pickled onion monster munch

no travelling, he is honest and open. But he generally likes me not to worry about anything whether I am pregnant or not. Easier said than done though.

When I was 7 months pregnant with DD my dad had an alcoholic breakdown. He was arrested numerous times by the police, was kicked out by my step-mum, would ring me constantly to moan and cry about his lot (without ever admitting to me what the real problems were) and ended up in hospital with firstly inertnal bleeding, and then after a drunken fall, brain damage.

In addition, I was really ill with a chest infectionduring my second trimester which took 9 weeks and 5 courses of antibiotics to shift.

I guess you could say I was stressed!

DD is now 8 months and an absolute joy. She's happy, smiley and loves being kissed and cuddled.

One of my friend's lost her husband in a freak accident when she was 4 months pregnant. It was a hideous, hideous situation. Her baby was born absolutely fine.

Sorry about the stress you're under.
My sister got pregnant aged 16 and kept it a secret. She made no plans for the birth and had no antenatal care at all! Despite the stress of covering up her situation until 38 weeks (!) and still going to school as normal her daughter was born safe and healthy.

Hi there. There are things you can take if you want to go down that route. I'm on diazepam for not sleeping (am 25 weeks) and doctor said as long as I'm not taking them every day they are completely harmless to baby, but just help you chill out a bit.

I suffered anxiety during my first pg and he turned out ok, if a little neurotic .