I have just had a miscarriage and I am so sad

[luckywinner]

I finally persuaded my dh to try for number 3 (which was a monumental decision). On the first month of trying I got pregnant. But started bleeding a lot Friday night. Not much else to say really apart from I feel really really sad. Started crying in church today which is so unlike me. This is the second miscarriage I have had but I still feel utterly crap.

Not really sure why I am posting this. Perhaps I am hoping it will have some sort of therapeutic effect. After my last miscarriage I suffered from really bad anxiety so I hope that doesn't happen again.

And would it be a really bad idea to start trying to conceive straight away?

I am so so sorry. recently went thought this and it is awful....feel so much for you.

fwiw, over time it will go up and down and down a bit less...you say you still feel crap even though it is your second...why would it feel any better!!! You've lost a baby and it is entirely appropriate for you to feel grief and loss.

My heart goes out to you.

x

I'm really sorry for your loss.

Re trying again - I think you should do what feels right for you and your husband. Have the two of you talked about it?

I'm really sorry . I've heard of lots of women who have started TTC straight after a miscarriage. Only you will know whether that's something you want to do.

It may give you something to focus on. Have you been to your GP about your anxiety? That's horrid.

Sorry for your loss. FWIW, I've had 2 and tried straight away after each. After 2nd one I caught straight away the following month. DR said no physical problem trying again straight away after an early and complete m/c.

I keep thinking though that maybe I imagined being pregnant and that this is just a really nasty period. But there are definitely two lines on the test.

I haven't spoken to my dh much yet about it as I am terrified he is going to say no, not again as it took so much to persuade him to go for a third and I am frightened that he will say no and then I will feel doubly worse.

The only way to describe how I am feeling right now is a to put a whole page of 's but I don't even have the energy to do that.

Ok maybe one

Luckywinner, so sorry to hear about your m/c - I too have recently had a m/c which would have been our third baby (and it is also my 2nd m/c) so I know pretty much how you are feeling.

With regards to trying again - we thought it best to wait for at least one period - after my last one I didn't want to try for months, but only you can decide what is best for you.

Hope you are feeling more positive soon but just be gentle on yourself - hopefully you won't have to wait long for a positive outcome .

Oh and btw I hope I am not upsetting any pregnant mumsnetters by talking about miscarriage in the pregnancy bit, I just didn't know where to put it.

You poor thing

There is a miscarriage forum on here, I used it after mine. It's on the scroll down bit on the body and soul thingy i think.

Mc's are so hard, you have my sympathy x

I'm so sorry to hear about your loss Luckywinner. Miscarriage is so hard, it feels like the theft of hopes and dreams I think, and you need to take time to let all the feelings come - be kind and gentle to yourself and your DH.

Thanks worzsel, I will go and have a look at the miscarriage board. It did feel a bit inappropriate to put it here.

Thanks for all your kind words though. I think you are right sydneysuze, being kind to myself is important but I am hopeless at it. However I have just bought myself a packet of party rings to cheer myself up. Nothing like a bit of pink food colouring to brighten the day.