will i get support with baby number 2?

[lisa85]

when i had my first son i wanted to breast feed but failed as i just thought it was me doing something wrong so didn't ask for help, now i know that support is out there i am determined to have another go once this baby is born but i am worried that as it is my second child that i'll just get left alone in the hospital to get on with it, is this the case or am i just paranoid?

I think you have to be quite vocal to get any help with anything the 2nd time around, I had DD2 at 14.30 and was asked at 19.00 if I wanted to go home now ? I told them I did not and wanted DD put in the nursery so I could get some sleep, they tucked her into bed with me, a hospital trolly bed, gives me a heart attack thinking back how she could have fallen out.
Anyway enough of my ramblings, find out the names of the breasting counsellors before hand and ask for them by name and make the midwifes help you and get your partner on side and don't let them give the babe a little bit of formula.

I agree the support in the hospital can be really hit and miss, whether its first or second time, depending on who's around and how busy they are, so you (or your partner) might need to be quite persistant. My DD was up in NICU, and I didn't even manage to get anyone to show me where/how to express until day 3 or 4 (and then only because my consultant told them to come and help me!). If I'd been more with it to keep asking though, I'm sure they would have wanted to help, they are generally nice people, just busy!

Something else you could do in advance is get hold of a book by Clare Byam-Cook called 'how to breastfeed and what to do if you can't' (or something like that) - it helped through all my BF probs and kept me going for a year! Even better - especially if like me you'd never really seen mums BF before - is her DVD, so you can see her getting babies positioned and latched on properly.

The NCT have a breastfeeding help-line too - (don't have it to hand, sorry, but should be easily found on their website)...

Pop it in your hospital bag for if the Hospital Breastfeeding counsellor isn't on shift when you need her!

I've never read the book but Claire Byam-Cook doesn't have a very good reputation and articles I have read quoting her have made me very sceptical (IIRC it was her advice about topups not threatening BF that was most worrying) about what she says, for all that she is popular.

I'd personally look for help from people in person. NCT, La Leche Leage - any local breastfeeding groups.

Go along in person while you're still pregnant and talk to them about your concerns and the support you might get in the hospital so you can be prepared.

My midwife gave me info on a local breastfeeding support group in the area and recommended that I go before I have the baby, just to get to know a few people and to get any info (plus they have someone from Bravissimo bras that comes to help with proper nursing bra fittings) I might like. I'm only 23wks right now, but I plan on going to a few meetings in a month or two to prepare, even though I've breastfed before.

Can you check with your midwife and see if she has any info on any local groups for you?

Each to their own Chairmum, and totally agree about getting support from local groups as well, but I think you need to get support from wherever works for you, so try everything to work out what suits?

If you've never read the book and not benefited from the advice then how can you judge? As I say, it helped me to BF for a year, whereas my local NCT were totally and completely useless - "you'll know when its right" FFS, if I knew, then I wouldn't be asking for advice! I haven't looked at the book for a few months, but I don't think she says anything about regular top-ups not affecting BF, quite the opposite if I remember rightly, she talks about using top ups if you need/want to but being aware that it might affect BF. It was pretty sensible advice throughout to be honest, and very enabling in making the right decision for you, without any of this awful emotional pressure that surrounds BF vs formula.

Our hospital offer bf classes antenatally. They were brilliant imo as I had much more of an idea of what to expect and the basics of positioning etc. Ask your mw if anything like that is available in your area.

I stayed in for 3 days after having ds1 until I was happy that we were doing ok with the latch and positioning. The bf specialist would check things every time ds fed. With ds2 I went home the next day, and tbh wasn't once offered any help.

Also our bf support group was invaluable. When times were tough and I thought that it couldn't possibly be normal, I'd tell myself to stick at it until monday (when our bf group meets) by which time the problem had either settled, or a load of the other Mums would tell me that it was normal (a growth spurt etc) or offer helpful solutions to get us back on track.

With this support I bf ds1 for 7 months and am still going with ds2 at 10 months.

Good luck to you - just nag, nag and nag some more while you're in to get off to a good start.