Teen mothers..?

[ErikaMaye]

Okay so I'm 17. And I've just found out I'm about 6/7 weeks pregnant.

And basically - I'm terrified. I'm really scared about every single aspect of the pregnancy and of being a mother, and I really would just like to talk to some other mothers, or those who are expecting.

Please don't judge me, I feel stupid already. But I'm determind to be the best mother I possibly can.

You can't have your baby taken away from you for being too young! Your boyfriends Mum is just trying to bully you I suspect.

The fact you are on here, caring this much shows that you are a great Mum in the making.
Keep asking questions and asking for support both here and in real life, don't think you're expected to know everything!

When is your first ante-natal appointment/scan? Are you taking ante natal multi vitamins - if not yet, pop out tomorrow and get some!

Just came across this and wanted to offer a bit of reassurance.

I was 18 when I found out I was pregnant with DD. The father wanted nothing to do with the pregnancy and vanished into thin air. My mother was very supportive and I lived at home during the pregnancy.

Having DD made me more determined to succeed in life and I think so far I've been fairly successful. I took her with me to university (went to Oxford, which proves that you don't need to lower your standards just because you have a child!), went backpacking with her, did an MSc and am currently doing a law conversion with a job lined up at the end of the course for a corporate law firm.

DD had her 8th birthday this weekend and I can tell you that having her has been the best thing I've ever done!

Congratulations! I'm sure you'll cope admirably!

I'm taking folic acid. Should I be taking anything else? My doctor didn't say.

I'm going to book an appointment to see the midwife later, for some point during the next week. I don't know exactly how far along I am, even, which makes me feel very irresponsible.

I'm sorry if I'm complaining so much, but I'm just so frightened, of having the baby, but especially of having it taken away. I don't want to be a bad mother. And his mother and step father said some really nasty things that keep spinning round in my head.

I've had Borderline Personality Disorder for all my life, and yeah - I do have bad turns at times. But I figure that everyone, whether mentally ill or not, does at times, so that makes me no different from anyone else. I've even come off my meds without hesitation, which is terrifying in itself. I want to be a good mother, I want to give this baby everything I possibly can.

Thankyou, all, for being so supportive. It really means the world to have people backing me up, even if I don't know you. No one else seems to be behind me at the moment.

I am twice your age, but my perspective is that in 15 years of teaching I've seen dozens of teen pregnancies, many as much as 4 years younger than you. They have all turned out to have different stories based on vastly differing circumstances. One 15 year old mum is now a teacher herself, and there are lots of other good examples where it really has worked out just fine.

You seem to be intelligent and thoughtful and you are clearly trying to think this through really rationally. The support of your family is so crucial, and remember, men have walked out on older partners of long relationships, so it can happen that any woman can end up going it alone.

Good luck to you, I'm sure you will do your best and that's as much as any of us can do, irrespective of age. xx