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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Have you found out the sex?

23 replies

memoo · 20/03/2009 19:18

I really want to find out what I'm having but DP is dead against knowing. When I have spoke to other mums they have all said they wouldn't want to know as it would take something away from the birth.

Did anyone else find out the sex? and if so did it really take something away from the birth?

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MrsHappy · 20/03/2009 19:25

I found out with my DD.

It took nothing away from the birth, perhaps bcause I was not that convinced the sonographer was right (she was).

Of my friends who did not find out the first time, about half wanted to find out the second time around. One girl goes on about wanting "a beautiful surprise" but I guess that depends on how you are going to feel after the birth. I was so knackered after DD I would never have thought to ask what she was...

WelshSuprise · 20/03/2009 19:28

Was desperate to find out on DD but they wouldn't tell you at the time so she was a suprise. This time round I found out we're having another girl and if anything it's making the birth more exciting for me as I can't wait to meet her !!

Must admit though, if DH hadn't felt the same way as me I probably wouldn't have found out.

Original poster

memoo · 20/03/2009 19:28

I was like that 2 MrsH, After my first 2 DC were born I was so knackered I really wasn't that bothered about wether they were a boy or a girl. Once I knew they were ok all i wanted to do was sleep

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suwoo · 20/03/2009 19:29

This is my third and I can't wait until Monday to find out (and obviously check all is ok too). I found out with my other two and it in no way detracts from the birth. We have even booked a gender scan 1 hour away for next weekend in case the gender can't be spotted on Monday. That is how strongly we feel about finding out .

Original poster

memoo · 20/03/2009 19:29

don't think we'll find out if DP doesn't want to Welsh, Don't want to spoil it for him

OP posts:

sazm · 21/03/2009 16:31

lol,i found out with my first 3 and sonographer was correct,
she wasnt this time though, were told it was a girl, discovered when bubby was born it was actually a boy!
hubs had to go shopping for a new carseat ( id bought a bright pink one)and a coming home outfit lol,
none of my preg friends have found out just incase lol,
if i ever had another i would get a 3/4d scan to confirm lol

was a lovely surprise though!!

Pinkbump3 · 21/03/2009 20:51

Im due #3 in 4 weeks and she will be my 3rd dd and i cant wait, knowing the sex has never took anything away from the birth, how could it? you are always going to be over the moon to meet this little creation of you! I think it would be sad if you where really hoping for a boy and when baby is born its a girl the first moment you see your child you would feel a tinge of dissapointment vice versa if the scan got things wrong, but honestly i could never say knowing took anything away from the birth its such a fantastic moment to meet your baby for the first time.

sazm · 21/03/2009 21:18

yep we couldnt have cared less if it was a boy or a girl,so long as it was healthy ( we lost our first lo)and it actually made it a whole lot more special to have such a surprise lol,im just glad i didnt spend £500 on the pink camo phil and teds i wanted!!!

techpep · 21/03/2009 21:24

I asked with dd but they couldn't see - her legs were crossed, and when she was born i was sooo pleased that i hadn't found out. For ds i decided not to find out and the birth was so awful i didn't even know i had a boy until about an hour after he was born, it just wasn't important. I do think though if your dp doesn't want to know you should maybe consider his wishes, after all you will find out in the end and dads can feel quite left out when it comes to the whole pregnancy/birth thing.

Pinkbump3 · 21/03/2009 21:24

sazm, sorry for the loss of your lo, i agree as long as they baby is healthy that is all that would truely matter to me. lol at having to buy a new car seat. i hope the scans not wrong as i have everything pink lol but even then it wouldnt spoil things!

sazm · 22/03/2009 10:38

lol, i had bought all white babygrows,vests and bibs for taking into hospital, now im so glad lol, he wore them for a day or 2 until i could get to the shops lol,
its a great story to tell him when he is older lol,

maybe i would feel different if i was one of the people (like my sister) who has 4 boys,
or someone who had a few boys/girls already and had really wanted a girl/boy and it turned out the scan was wrong?

my lo who is 4 was upset he cried for about an hour when he found out he wasn't getting another sister!he loves his brother now tho lol

brettgirl2 · 22/03/2009 11:00

I found out that my baby is (meant to) be a girl. It's kind of helped me get to know her personality a bit through the pg and therefore kind of helped me to bond.

As the birth gets nearer though I'm FAR more worried about the baby being OK - if it has a willy when it comes out then that would also be great (well assuming it isn't a girl!!!!!!).

TrillianAstra · 22/03/2009 11:07

Oooh, what happens if they tell you the wrong sex, then all the stress about choosing a name will have been wasted!

I know not everyone 'stresses' about baby names but plenty of people must do or else we wouldn't have a whole baby names topic.

Nemoandthefishes · 22/03/2009 11:12

With Ds we found out and with him being the first I think it helped us bond with him.
I know I am having a dd3 now[our 4th] and its again nice to know partly so we can organise who will be going where..doesnt take anythign away from the birth at the end of the day there are only 2 options!!!
With both dd1 and dd2 we didnt know as they wouldnt show anything and was nice for dh to say dd1 was a girl but didnt give or take anything extra.

littlelamb · 22/03/2009 11:15

One word of warning. My friend just had her second, she was told it was a boy and spent the rest of the pregnancy worrying about it as she already has a girl, and thought she wouldn't know what to do wih a boy. SHe gave birth two days ago. To a girl
For me, I was convinced dd would be a boy and it was such a lovely moment to have that surprise at the birth. With ds I wasn't told but my pregnancy was so different (and the scan subsequently very very clear that I knew he was a boy. His birth was still special obviously but I did miss that lovely surprise so if there is a next time I will not ask.

fingermousey · 22/03/2009 11:49

I found out the sex both times. I just couldn't wait. I do really admire people who wait as I think it's wonderful to not know until the moment they are born. However, having said that, I think I got to know each baby better in the womb because I knew their sex.

I also didn't tell anyone(apart from husband and best friend). I think part of the joy of waiting is keeping everyone else waiting too! So, if you do find out you can still keep it a secret if you want to. I did hate lying to people and telling them I didn't know

Sweetie34 · 24/03/2009 09:41

I am 26 weeks pregnant. Everyone is really shocked (and a litte unbelieving) that I don't want to know until the day!

To me, it just isn't that important at this moment in time.

I didn't find out with DD, and that was a BIG BIG surprise as I was convinced I was having a boy (family history)!!

This time I sway between the two. Sometimes I am convinced it is a girl, at teh moment I am pretty sure it is a boy - he is so greedy, very mobile and feels very big.

Can't wait to see if my theory is correct!

BabyBump2B · 24/03/2009 17:26

I'm going to (hopefully) find out on Friday. Its really important to me to find out as I am a major planner and will take half the decision making out of the process. I do say with friends who have done it both ways the DH's say that when they found out they felt closer to the baby earlier and could say "my son" / "my daughter" and it made them feel more involved!

BabyBaby123 · 24/03/2009 19:24

i didn't find out with my first my did with my second and third (this pregnancy) knowing took nothing away from the birth - it really helped with bonding and has again this time. If I have another I will find out again. It was strange calling my first 'it' the whole time and when he was born everything was white or lemon - this time ans last time I was/am able to buy in advance - having fun looking at summer clothes knowing the sex of my baby already!

Gillyan · 24/03/2009 20:32

I didn't know for my first and i do know this time ( Due in July - Girl ) I drove myself crazy last time wondering what the baby was! I feel so much more connected to the baby this time knowing she is a girl and just calling her 'her' and using thr word 'she' is lovely. I also wanted to know so i could get my other daughter whose 3yrs ready and thought I could explain to her better using the words brother or sister.

Also for me by the time DD came out I couldn't of cared what she was as long as the labour was over and the baby was ok. Good luck!

Eyeballsinthesky · 24/03/2009 20:34

We found out the sex and I didn't regret it for a second. I'm too curious, not knowing was never an option. And actually, no one bothered to tell me what sex she was when she was born so it was just as well we already knew.

KAEKAE · 25/03/2009 10:58

We found out with our son, it didn't take anything anyway from the birth, you're so overwhelmed when it all happens anyway.

Up until we found out the sex I was convinced I was having a girl, thought I had bonded with a girl and was totally freaked out when told we were expected a boy! I know there's a 50/50 chance but hey I was still shocked!! lol! I am so glad we found out and will do the same with this baby.

Trikken · 25/03/2009 11:16

We found out at the twenty week scan. it took nothing away as we were excited to see him and get to know him

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