Things you cannot do when you are pregannt

[grommit]

I am having difficulty remembering the list of things not to do when you are pregnant so thought I'd ask the experts. Food - soft cheese, shellfish, liver, pate, uncooked eggs. I also remember something about not wearing underwire bras, not visiting birthing sheep, not using electric blanket, not spraying garden pesticides, not gardening without gloves....Anything else??

blimey, ghosty, bad day?

Ghosty - very passionate but spot on as usual. I totally agree with you that it is no longer just your body and that pregnant women have a huge repsonsibility to be as careful as is practical and sensible - in my book that means giving up a few things for 9 months. I love red wine, stinky soft cheeses and pate but won?t even touch it as any risk is not worth it.
As for not caring about listeria, salmonella etc. when not pregnant - got to disagree with you there. I had a really bad bout of salmonella (luckily before pregnancy) and it was horrendous. Wouldn?t wish it on anyone as I felt like I was dying. It was a massive wake up call and made me spring clean my kitchen and check food date labels like never before - i am a bit of an evangelist about it all now much to the amusment of my DH (not really known for being too particular with my own consumption of out of date stuff, always careful for DD).

My take on all of this is moan like mad if you want as it is a pain in the bum missing out on so many of life?s pleasantries. However, when you have finished moaning, do everything in your power to stay safe in the knowledge that it isn?t forever( and chocolate is not on the list..).

Oh, someone please tell me the odd glass of wine isn't going to cause Fetal Alcohol Syndrome? Surely this isn't the advice everywhere? I have been avoiding everything else (smoking, soft cheese, cook-chill foods, soft eggs) but I have been having the odd glass of wine. I haven't felt remotely pissed at any time since I found out so surely this won't have had an effect? I've never had more than 2 glasses at one time. And I've had pre-packed sandwiches sometimes, you really can't avoid everything (better to faint while driving and kill us all as I didn't have bread in the house/time to prepare something to take before driving 300 miles?). Blimey, there's enough guilt once you've had the baby...

www, I agree completely. fetal alcohol syndrome is a recognised, well documented syndrome that results from excessive alcohol consumption in pregnancy. saying that one glass of wine will cause it is frankly completely wrong, and ignores all medical knowledge and evidence against it. and I don't believe that it is NZ governmental policy to say that because it simply isn't true. It may be their policy to say don't drink a single glass of wine, but not because that glass will cause FAS!
And how you handle yourself in pregnancy, is, just like the rest of life, a matter of balancing risks. But when you are pregnant the balance is a slightly different, because most people would choose to take fewer risks when they are responsible for two lives instead of one. But you still can only do as much as it is realistic for you to do and still continue with real life!
If you can avoid pre-packed sandwiches, then fine. If you can't (because of your working environment and the food that is available when you need it) then you'll choose whatever sandwich is lowest risk. It's a bit like saying that although you used to drive on the motorway before you were pregnant, you shouldn't once you are pregnant because if you had a crash you'd kill yourself and the baby and not just yourself!
I'm all for being sensible in pregnancy but some people completely martyr themselves to it. Fine, as long as they don't martyr everyone else at the same time ("I'm so sorry, didn't I tell you I was pregnant before coming around to dinner? No, I won't have a cashew nut. So sorry, could you put that meat back in the oven for another 20 minutes? No, really, please don't wait for me, everyone else start..oh, well if you are sure it is no trouble. No salad for me thanks, I don't eat pre-prepared salad. I think I won't have a meringue in case the egg whites aren't cooked. No, well even if it was in the oven for 4 hours you can't be too careful".) aurghghghghgh!

PPH, thank you! Pregnancy is making such a worrier of me, I can't wait to be half rational again (although ex dh would say I never was )

www, I used to go on the assumption that as long as I had the wine on a full stomach and had a big non alocohic drink afterwards, a daily glass or two in the second and especially the third trimester was OK.

Isn't there a theory that states if a mother feels stressed, upset or angry this is bad for the growing baby inside her? And that stressed mothers produce hyperactive children? Worried me that, since in my last pregnancy I was working weeks and weekends, and helping dh decorate and sell our our house.

I decided that if a glass of wine helped me to chill out, it was doing more good than harm.

In the UK there is no absolute statement about alcohol because the evidence is not there. Fetal Alcohol Syndrome is associated excessive alcohol. I personally think that the odd glass of wine or beer will do no harm. I completely abstained in my first pregnancy and was more relaxed about it in the others. It is the same about alcohol and breatfeeding - an alcoholic drink can help with relaxation and let-down, without resulting in a 'gassed' baby. There is no doubt that there is useful information out there on how to avoid contracting infections during pregnancy and ghosty is right about the risks to the unborn child. However, www makes good points as well. All of you enjoy your pregnancies in any way you can

In the UK there is no absolute statement about alcohol because the evidence is not there. Fetal Alcohol Syndrome is associated excessive alcohol. I personally think that the odd glass of wine or beer will do no harm. I completely abstained in my first pregnancy and was more relaxed about it in the others. It is the same about alcohol and breatfeeding - an alcoholic drink can help with relaxation and let-down, without resulting in a 'gassed' baby. There is no doubt that there is useful information out there on how to avoid contracting infections during pregnancy and ghosty is right about the risks to the unborn child. However, princesspeahead makes good points as well. All of you enjoy your pregnancies in any way you can

Ha, did you notice my correction to my second posting?

One glass of wine cannot cause FAS. That's just not true. Pregnancy can be a worrying time, but one glass of wine has never caused FAS.

I agree that a glass or two in the 2nd/3rd trimesters is OK, if with food and low-ish alcohol ( ie wine 11% rather than say 14%).
When my midwife asked me last week what my birth plan was, I told her : a couple of paracetamol, large glass of bubbly and a long bath at home. She thought that was a great idea. (Followed by a quick trip to the hospital once the tens machine no longer hits the right spot). Babe was due yesterday and I am dying to open the chilled bubbly I have waiting!

thanks mears!!

pph, aloha, mears - thanks for some common sense as opposed to hysterical, martyred, more-pregnant-than-thou ranting.

Bossykate, I just KNOW you are far to sensible and sussed to fall prey to complete paranoia, but I do know how pregnancy has a funny effect on the brain I remember getting giddly worried about all sorts of nonsense. It wasn't helped by the fact that I honestly forgot I was pregnant sometimes - especially when faced with a menu or wine list!

not at all, bossykate, sensible is my middle name (princess pea sensible head)

and that thing with the meringue really did happen to me at a dinner party. this girl (1st pregnancy, about 15 weeks pregnant) looked at it like it was going to bite her head off. It was very funny!

aloha, thanks, actually i try to follow a balanced risks approach, e.g. i will have a glass wine per week after the first trimester as this falls well within FSA guidelines and i will continue to have my hair dyed. i also think cook/chill foods are fine as long as they are reheated properly. i can't remember worrying about pre-packed sandwiches last time, just pre-prepared salads such as coleslaw (i.e. not washed lettuce leaves), and dh got to do all the gardening because of toxoplasmosis (teehee!). i've only just started reading up on the stuff in the last few days - i'm sure i don't remember everything from last time and there were things like not eating too much tuna or any peanuts that completely passed me by last time despite loads of reading up.

some of the posts below remind me of one of dh's colleagues who gave birth about 4m after we had ds. she drove me nuts! e.g. we mentioned we'd got a chest of drawers for ds's room and had tarted it up with some new knobs. she then started banging on about how they had to meet a certain official safety standard so they wouldn't be dangerous if ds ever chewed them. another time she knew we'd got our car seat already but couldn't resist out-parenting us by sending us a list of the safest ones from some survey she'd found. yeah right, what were we going to do? return ours and get the one she'd got? or if we didn't do that and gain the additional .0000025% safety we would be bad parents? very sanctimonious on the subject of diet in pregancy of course... even though hers was not beyond reproach...

as you can tell i'm still hacked off more than 2 years on about this!

now i'm ranting myself, so will stop.

Oh BK, I wasn't doubting your willpower, just remembering how f*ing hard it was !!

As one who got hammered on New Year's Eve and found out a week later that I was pregnant, I was dead worried about FAS and in the first few weeks was convinced Social Services would step in as soon as I'd given birth but gradually calmed down.

Smoking was one of the things that convinced me to do a test, it made me feel really sick (but still continued to do 40 a day until I did the test, plus the odd lapse after, IT IS SO HARD !)

I was lucky because it made me feel vile and the smell of beer & lager was unbearable too - I'm sure my body was protecting the small spudlet from my usual habits. Red wine calmed my (24 hour) morning sickness and my work stress. I also used to divide my glass of wine into 3 portions and top it up with sparkling mineral water to make it last - how sad am I !

hi twink, my evil self has been saying, "why on earth did you do the by test so by early - you could have got another fortnight's dissipation in!"

oh, and i completely forgot you're supposed to give up caffeine and had about 4 cups of tea and a can of coke yesterday... hey ho.

bk - latest study I saw said less than 4 cups of coffee (so about 6 of tea I think) is OK.

Also think giving up smoking is the hardest. In fact it was harder to give up pregnant than it was last time I gave up in ordinary times (possibly because it was forced on me? ). I have resigned myself to starting again when baby is born, but hopefully I'll change my mind.

Anyway on the whole I think that excessive stressing over what you should and shouldn't do when pregnant is as bad for the baby as the supposed risks you are trying to avoid. You may get listeria (bad) from eating soft cheese, but how many times have you had Listeria and how many times have you eaten soft cheese when not pregnant? Listeria is not symptomless.

Wine, in moderation, is good for you! Especially when red wine is mixed with lemonade, Spanish style.

Finally, Tigermoth - stress isn't brilliant for babies but I'm not sure about the hyperactive children link. dp and his sis were both hyperactive, but have the most laid back mother you have ever met.

ah lucy, tinto de verano, muy refrescante (if that's a word...)

Ok ... hello ... s'me again
Maybe I did come on a bit strong in my last post ... I really didn't mean to rant ... (BK ... I was having a bad day actually ... how could you tell? )
All I was trying to say to those who were saying that it has all gone too far ... is that all the government is doing is advising us about the risks of eating certain things because of what 'might' happen to your baby if you were to get this, that or the other.
Of course it is totally up to us whether we do anything about that advice. Yes it is so unlikely for me to get listeria or something but I just don't want to take the risk so I personally choose to avoid things (I suppose one miscarriage under my belt is bound to make me a little paranoid ...) ... BUT, I am absolutely not a pain in the bum about it ... and I don't preach ... honest! At the moment it is not hard as I feel so sick so the thought of wine and fags and other things makes me want to run to the loo anyway!!
About the FAS thing ... PrincessPeaHead it IS the common advice given in NZ not to drink AT ALL ... I do live here you know and I should know what they advise you to do! ... I did drink the odd glass of wine when I was pg with DS and I probably will in this pg when I stop feeling so crap but .... take a look at this .
All literature re. alcohol is the same here ... it is also in my NZ Bounty pregnancy book and several NZ pregnancy books that I have seen in the shops. So, believe it or not that is what they do advise here ... NO alcohol at all! I will choose whether to ignore it or not as I had a perfectly healthy DS and drank wine when pg with him ... but that's my choice!
WWW ... the last thing I want is for you to feel guilty old bean ... I was just saying what is the 'thing' here!

ghosty, I wasn't doubting that NZ government policy was to say no drinking at all during pregnancy, I was doubting that they said one drink will cause FAS because it simply isn't true! But having seen the link you have sent over, they are walking a very fine line, aren't they? complete scaremongering! especially that statement "not drinking anything is the best way of ensuring you don't get FAS". Hmmm, yes. Bit like saying "not taking a single puff of a cigarette when you are 15 is the best way of ensuring you don't get lung cancer 30 years later"....

True PPH ... very true ... ... and a good comparison with the smoking thing too ...
Maybe they are walking a fine line ... I think it may also be that alcoholism in young people is rife here and it is just a way to put people off ... I don't know ...
I find it funny how advice changes all the time ... when I was pg with DS there were no warnings about tuna ... and now ... too much is bad for the baby...
And all the advice when they are born changes all the time too ... When DS was a baby weaning at 16 weeks was the norm ... now it is 'exclusive breast or bottle until 6 months' ... I shudder at the thought of having to hold off solids from DS until he was 6 months ... he would have eaten his own leg off!!!!! And in the 60s my mum gave us solids at 6 weeks ... she desperately tried to persuade me that I needed to do that but I didn't give in!! My mum was also shocked that I never seasoned DS' food 'I don't know how he can like something that tastes so bland ... here, put a big spoon of marmite in it!'
A friend of mine recently told me that here in NZ they tell you not to give your baby fish until they are a year old ... I was giving DS fish at 6 months I seem to remember!
Oh, it is so confusing .....
I think the best thing for all of us to do is go with what we think is best ... we have the information, it is up to us to use it as we see fit ... being sensible of course!! Like the alcohol thing ... like you, I don't believe one glass of wine 3 - 4 times a week is going to harm my baby ... as my DS wasn't harmed at all ... but some people could read 'alcohol is fine' and not read the 'in moderation' bit and that would be a problem ...
Blimey ... am so rambling now .... sorry ... am off to hug the toilet!!