Major placenta previa

[rek21]

Well, I've been burying my head in the sand about this so far, but I think now is the time to ask for the collected mumsnet wisdom.

At my 20 week scan the baby's placenta was centrally positioned at the bottom of the womb completely covering the os. A repeat scan at 24 weeks showed no change of position although the sonographer felt that there was no sign of the placenta growing into the scar from my previous c-section (DD, 16 months was breech). I have another scan lined up at 29 weeks followed by a consultant's appointment.

I'd really like to hear from anyone with experience of this severity of the condition, either first hand or otherwise. Is there any chance of the placenta moving? I have found it hard to pin medical types down on this - the best chance I have been given is 50/50. Has anyone had major placenta previa and not had a bleed? If so when did you have a c-section? Do any other symptoms accompany bleeding? I have this fear that it will happen in the middle of the night and I won't even realise!

Really, I'd be grateful for any experience. I have read the RCOG guidance on the net but I would really like a more personal perspective.

Many thanks.

Hi cazzaben thanks for thinking of me! I am a bit up and down,currently on my 4th visit to delivery unit, but is just precautionary, no plans to deliver the baby yet. I ambleeding a small amount most days and all the staff have started to look at me like a ticking timebomb! I am 32 weeks today, which feels like a huge milestone.

The staff are lovely and put up with my grumpy moments very well! I was in a foul mood yesterday because I was supposed to be getting a trip out of the hospital but ended up on du instead but they were very understanding. I have now eaten my way through the whole 2 week menu! It's not that bad but, a bit lacking in novelty.

Worst bit is still missing dd and dh so much, it is not easy organising visits with dd because she gets so bored at the hospital and wants me to carry her and run around a lot which I just can't manage at the mo. I'm just taking each day as it comes. I know it will be worth it in the end, I'm so looking forward to seeing our new little girl, just not for a few more weeks!

Hope you andyour family are well.

Oh Rek, I've just seen this! I never did get back to you with the survival tips and now you need them!

32 weeks is fab - I had ds2 at 33 weeks and he came home from hospital 2 weeks later.

Are there any play areas in the hospital? Ask about the paediatric outpatient clinc - their waiting room will probably have lots of toys in it, so when your family visit you may all be able to go and sit there so your dd doesn't get bored. Also could you get dh to bring in a game or something (snap, etc) - a different thing each time, so you can sit on the bed and play with her.

I had a laptop with a wireless internet connection which completely saved my sanity, and skype for cheap chatting with friends. Is that a possibility for you? Not on delivery unit, obviously, but when they let you back out.

You end up feeling like a pin cushion don't you? When I had ds2 I had people all round me sticking things in me and one of them apologised, I remember laughing ...

Prem babies are gorgeous by the way. You get months of people cooing over them, thinking they are newborn. Mothercare is good for clothes - they do a couple of sizes smaller than newborn.

We are doing very well thanks Rek...
Little one has been poorly since last Monday and even had a trip to the hospital on Wednesday as he had a temp of 40.3
Still he's doing ok now...

Glad your holding up ok. Its hard to try and entertain a little one in hospital isn't it?? I had a big bag of toys that I kept at the hospital for when he came to visit. We bought him a mini washing machine as he became quite facinated with them while i was away!! Also as fruitful said using another room is always good. I used the day assesment room as there were some toys and a little telly and Dvd player where he would watch teletubbies and stuff. All the staff would come in and say hi and also take his temp and pretend to take his blood pressure.
Its always hard (especially when they are very young and dont understand) when you have a little one to entertain its not like she's young enough to talk and play proper games.

I do hope that the bleeding subsides a bit for you too. It must be worrying you all the time (especially at night) I always said to the staff at weekends (who were generally bank staff and didnt really know me) that I would never use my call button except in an emergency. I know they dont tend to rush to those buzzers as people used them a bit too much!!! LOL

The other girl I was in with brought in some Wasgij puzzles... We would sit for hours doing those and chatting we had a table in the ward where we had goodies.
We also made a den out of the curtains too (how sad!!!) LOL.
Can you imagine 2 grown women in an antenatal ward making a den out of curtains?? I think people thought we had lost our minds! Still those are the good memories I take with me and they got me through the awful weeks of being away from home and famiy.

I do remember a bank midwife coming to tell us off for laughing one night she walked in and said 'ok lights out at 10.30'...
I proceeded to explain that although we are here for a reason we were not children and would know ourselves when to turn our lights off.

Anyway enough of me rabbiting on keep busy and keep your chin up.
I'll keep checking on here to see how your doing though
Love to you and your family xxxxxxxxxxxx

Hi fruitful and cazzaben, thanks for your posts, I hope your little one is feeling better cazza. We have found the outpatients play area and use that quite a bit, which is great and it turns out that there is someone employed by the hospital to help in just these circumstances, I think she is a play therapist and can bring activities and things to do. I am meeting her on weds. I think dd is getting a bit obsessed with babies as apparently it's all she says at nursery and when she came in yesterday she wanted to be cuddled like a baby. It's understandable I suppose!

I can quite imagine ending up building dens! I keep getting told off by the midwives for 'galavanting' because I won't stay on the ward and keep goi g down to the concourse to meet with friends. I have accepted being stuck in the hospital, but I'm not going to end up stuck in bed the whole time. It is easy to feel like you are in some sort of bizarre boarding school,as my friend pointed out even the mealtimes seemdesigned for children, 12 and 5!

Anyway, it must be nearly time for my rice crispies . Thanks again and I'll keep you posted.

Good grief no, don't stay on the ward! How dare they tell you off, they're only jealous ...

I used to sit in the concourse cafe with my book and a cup of tea, and try to remind myself, that in 6 months time, I would probably give anything for the chance to sit in a cafe by myself with a book!

It is all a bit surreal, isn't it.

If it is any help, my older 2 remember the time when I was in hospital, but they don't remember it as a bad time. It was just a different time. (I was the one trying not to cry after they left at the end of visiting time, not them).

Hang in there. Every extra day helps.

Actually - I've just thought. I have a padded fleece support that goes in a carseat/pram to make it small enough for a prem baby. I tried to freecycle it a while ago but wanted it to go to someone who actually needed it, and didn't find anyone.

You may not have a prem baby - you might make it to 37 weeks and have a whopper, you never know - but I can post it to you if you think you'd like it.

Joining in on this as I too had a stay in hospital due to placenta praevia and reccurant bleeds. Had various episodes from 23 weeks until 30 weeks at which point my consultant got spooked by the regularity and ordered me to stay in hospital on bedrest. I didn't have any other children at this point (other than the two in my tummy) so I can't imagine how difficult and upsetting that would be. However, I wanted to post because I well remember how wretched and boring it all was. I spent five weeks in hospital before my twins were born and it was pretty dreadful. Frightened about the possibility of further bleeds, so wandering around in a state of 'high alert' in case one suddenly happened. Sleep deprived from weeks of trying to sleep on an NHS sponge mattress, half-starved due to the dire hospital food. It also didn't help that my hospital, Queen Charlottes, was excellent in terms of resources and care but was slap-bang in the middle of nowhere - Wandsworth Scrubs prison was next door - so there were no local shops or cafes that I could nip to. The following helped me get through it: -

1. Turn your day around small events. I'd take half a morning to wash my hair and would do all manner of convoluted treatments on it (would buy those ultra conditioning packs from Boots). Upshot was that it would usually kill a few hours and my hair was EXCELLENT by the time I got home. Other good diversions were doing my nails and toenails (the latter took ages as I'd have to navigate my huge tummy).

1. Beg people to visit. I was unlucky in this respect as although I was only 20 minutes drive from home it wasn't particularly straightforward in terms of tube or driving so friends (who all worked or had children of their own) didn't really visit. A couple of good girlfriends came once a week but other than that it was me on my own every day until my husband came after work. I wish I'd been more forceful now - basically rang friends and ASKED them to visit me as even just an hour with a friend can really break up the day. Until you've actually spent time in a hospital I don't think you realise how slowly time goes by.

1. Get out and about. I'd go to the hospital coffee shop and sit with a book or people-watch. I'd also go to the hospital shop and buy magazines and wander about. Every morning I'd go for a gentle walk around the perimeter of the hospital. Towards the end, when the bleeding was getting heavier, I'd carry a little note with me explaining the situation (i.e. 34 weeks, twin pregnancy, placenta praevia, recurrant bleeds, in-patient at QCCs, consultant name, etc.). I never needed it but it felt like a small piece of insurance and peace of mind. I actually kept one of these little slips as a bit of a memento (to remind me of that crazy time) and it always makes me feel a bit tearful to read it as it within those few, stark words is such a story.

I'd also go for walks through the hospital - through corridors and around and about - anything to keep my moving and to get away from the ward.

1. Ask for a private/amenity room. Not all hospitals have these but it's definately worth asking for, especially if you're going to be there for a longer time than the norm. I got one of these and the difference it made was huge - I was able to sleep without disturbance and have more stuff from home with me.

1. If you haven't already, get some stuff from home. I had a giant mug (handy for making massive cups of herbal tea from the hot water spout at the tea/coffee station. I also got a pillow from home, a nice room spray and, in the end, even had my bouncy ball there. A laptop might be an idea as you can watch DVDs, etc. which are always good to kill time.

1. See if the hospital will allow you to have a TV by your bed. Again, every hospital varies on this but they might be more lenient for a long-stay patient. I got one as soon as I moved into my own room, although it was a portable one that my husband brought from home as all the hospital ones had, apparently, been 'stolen'! Beats me how people can find the energy to nick a TV when they've just had a baby, but then humanity can be very odd...

1. Food. I have a theory that hospital food is very like aeroplane food; okay for a day but beyond that pretty unpalateable and makes you feel fairly bunged up and unhealthy. Get someone to bring in snacks (dried apricots, crackers, fruit, smoothies) and ask people to bring a meal in when they come and visit. My mother-in-law drove 200 miles to visit me and brought me roast chicken and home-made minestrone (the latter in a vacuum flask) and then drove the 200 miles back - another thing that makes me tearful when I think about it! My husband would bring in packets of smoked salmon and prepared salads from M&S and I'd munch my way through that.

1. See if your hospital will let you out for a few hours - a bit like 'time off for good behaviour' or 'parole' but you might be able to negotiate with your consultant. After I cried near-solidly for eight hours one day my consultant finally agreed to let me go out for dinner with my husband. We'd go out every few nights to restaurants in Holland Park AVenue (about five minutes drive from the hospital). I'd sit there in my hastily thrown together outfit (usually totally unsuitable for the weather as I'd gone into hospital in September and left at the end of October) with my hospital tag on my wrist and revel in being part of the outside, real world once more. Not sure if that's an option with your toddler and babysitting issues but if you could manage it, it would probably help. Again, it breaks up an evening.

Fill your day however you need to. I read The Telegraph from cover to cover and did every puzzle in it (Sudoko, 'Easy' and Cryptic crosswords...). I read books and magazines and went for walks and did stretching exercises (gentle pilates).

Everyone says that "you're in the best place" when you're in hospital for placenta praevia, but whilst you're there it can feel like the worst place and every day can be very hard to get through. You've no idea when you'll get to go home or when the next bleed is coming so there is uncertainty all round. Plus, you have the added pressure of being away from your little girl, which can't be easy.

Time will pass and you WILL get home in the end. Fill your day however you need to and remember that you're a patient in hospital and not at school or in prison so you are allowed to do whatever you need to do to get through the days. I always felt that the midwives preferred it if I lay on my bed all day as that way they knew where I was and there was zero risk, but I just couldn't do that. In the end they got used to me wandering about - a lot of my notes contain "Kitstwins Not In Her Room", which I now find quite amusing. My small rebellion amidst the insanity!

Hang in there. This too shall pass. Hang onto that thought. YOu're being very brave as it's very hard.

evening rek, been thinking about you too. glad to hear you are keeping yourself busy.

just reading back fruitful, caz and kits posts and think you're all so lucky to be able to leave. my midwives were dead against any movement that wasn't from bed to day room to bathroom. I felt more incarated than someone on a mental health section in a secure hospital.

kits - you were so lucky to get an amenity room. I wasn't allowed one even if I paid because I was so high risk and had to have a bed in the high risk bay in front of the nurses station. thought this was all a bit funny really as I never saw a midwife during the day hours, all my obs were done at night.

one question for you all - did you all have venflons inserted into the back of your hand for the whole duration of your stay? just asking as we had a major bust up with the midwives because the consultant removed it after 10days bleed free and the midwives were up in arms as it was against policy.

rek - whats for tea tonight?

I wasn't allowed out any further than the ward or the front door... The day assessment room was next door to my ward. When I say ward I mean our room on the ward.
It wasn't so bad coz I would walk around (the antenatal ward) finding people to talk to. Our maternity unit is seperated from the main hospital and we were not allowed to go over there. The canteen was there and the shop. There was a little vending machine on our ward and that was it.

I had venflons in for the first 3 weeks and had it changed every 3 days. I asked the consultant if there was any possibility of not having to have this done as I was running out of veins!! The midwives kicked up a huge stink but the consultants said it was ok not to have them. The only place I went to was the bathroom, the Day assessment room and to the other 2 rooms (there were 3 rooms on the ward and 2 private rooms). Oh and downstairs to the lobby to say goodbye but was told never to be longer than 5 mins.

When I was told I had to stay in one particular midwife told me that I would only be able to see my son at visiting times unless I had my own room.... So I was moved for around a week. This was awful for me!!! I hated every single second in that room. I wanted to be around people and felt like I was being locked away from everyone. I was then told I could see my son whenever I wanted (for a maximum of 2 hrs) in one of the shared rooms.
So I moved back into a room with another lady who also had PP. We spent the best part of 6 weeks together she ended up having her baby early... Anyway...

So with reference to your Twinkletoes I dont feel I was very lucky at all... Lucky that my baby was fine and lucky that I made some amazing friends but never went anywhere away from the ward...

Its funny you saying about being a mental patient in a secure ward though.... My sister was in Parklands hospital (just a short walk away from the maternity unit) which is a secure psychiactric unit. (she tried to kill herself days before I went into hospital). She was allowed out to visit me!!!!! She used to come and visit and say she was on her way out to KFC or to visit some friends. So your right about that one...

Sorry to take over your thread there Rek

Howz things going? I do hope them midwives are being kind. Also I do hope you have a nice consultant. I used to see mine very rarely but I was lucky that I was used as a subject for some students and met an amazingly lovely consultant he would come and visit me every day. He rearranged his diary to make sure he was able to perform my section. I still see him now for other my gyne appts!

Still thinking of you and your DD and DH hoping that the time is passing quickly for you
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Thats such crap about needing to keep the venflons in! When I started my last bleed with ds2, the blood was bouncing off the floor and up the cupboard two feet away. I had a venflon in each arm in under 5 minutes (plus being taken to theatre, swabbed, shaved, catheterised, scanned etc). There were more than 20 people in the theatre doing it, they didn't need me to have the venflons in already. Then they gave me a general and stuck a whacking great one in my neck after that.

Cazzaben - I'd have hated being in a sideroom too. Although dh, dd, and ds1 were allowed to visit between 9am and 10pm if they wanted to. And I liked it when other people had their kids in too - they used to come and play with my collection of toy cars .

Rek, I hope you're ok.

That was my theory too fruitful... I told them that if I did bleed then they would be able to do it so quickly...
I think it was because the midwives are on the frontline iykwim and have to deal with the bleeding in the first instance...

Consultant said that they would be able to get it in quicker than you could say... get it in!! LOL

Hi everyone, here I am at 4am not able to sleep because baby rek has changed position and seems to want to burst out the front of my stomach, alien-style. I thought I'd check mnet and nearly burst into tears when I saw all your messages, firstly because you've all taken the time to write and secondly just to hear that everyone's experience is so similar to mine, it's so easy to feel like you are the only person in the world that this has ever hapened to (ridiculous of course!)

I'm doing this on my phone so it's a bitdifficult to scan backwards and see who said what, so forgive me if I don't answer everyone directly.

First: venflons - bl*y things! I have reached the end of my tether with them as every time I even have a spot of blood they stick one in me, then it doesn't get flushed anyway so it would be totally useless if they needed it. The midwives won't even put them in any more because I'm so full of holes so I have to wait for a doctor. The final straw was sat when I started to bleed and a doctor put the wrong sort in (not big enough) then when they took me up to delivery as a precaution they said I should have it replaced but all the doctors were in theater so one woke me up at 1.30am to put one in. Back on the ward at 10pm the midwife tried to flush it but it was already clotted so it was agony and she had to take it out! Next morning I told the doctor that I will now refuse to have them unless I have a significant bleed. Grrrrr!

Secondly tv - we have that patient line system here but it is costingme £10 every 5 days to use it. I can't believe how much it is costing me to stay in hospital, I had a huge mobile phone bill this month (I suppose I'm lucky I can use it really) it costs my visitors a minimum of £3 each time to park, which for family and dh is really mounting up. I tried to buy a meal in the hospital canteen because there was no vegetarian food on the ward that day, and it cost £10!

Thanks for all the suggestions of things to do, it sounds like I am lucky with most, I am allowed off the ward, I've been lent a DVD player and I have lots ofgreat visitors. Also family and dh cottoned on to the food thing quite quickly and bring me lovely food parcels - I've never been so pleased to see a bagel or a bottle of schloer before! My consultant has agreed in principle to a 'day release' scheme, but only at weekends (something to do with traffic I think) and I keep having bleeds at weekends so so far I have only got out once.

I'm really pleased to hear (from fruitful I think) that her dcs havn't been negatively effected by the hospital stay as that is really my biggest worry. Dd is so little and doesn't understand at all and I think she must feel so abandoned. She can't even really understand that mummy is having a baby or mummy is poorly. I am just consoling myself that at least she has a great daddy and lovely grandparents to care for her and hopefully a few weeks after I get back she won't remember I was gone. Although she will have to come to terms with the new baby which will be hard after such a disruptive time.

Well, the latest from my consultant (who is very nice) is that he is going to book my section for 37 weeks (5 weeks time) but he doesn't think I'll get that far. I'd obviously like to get as far as possible but I appreciate his honesty.

fruitful on the subject of the car seat insert, I am definstely interested, but won't tempt fate by saying yes just yet! I can't even bring myself to order any tiny baby clothes, although I will almost certainly need them, just in case... Watch this space...

Anyway thanks again so much everyone, I honestly can't tell you how much I appreciate hearing from you. I hope you and all your families are thriving, I must remember it will be worth it in the end!

talk to patientline and explain situation. I managed to get two days free for every five purchased.

also talk to the ward clerk and see whether you can get a permit for the carpark given the circumstances. we managed to wangle one and then swapped it between cars.

thanks for the venflon answers too - seems that maybe practice has changed and maybe the midwives haven't caught up yet?

caz - wrong choice of word (lucky), sorry. I think I meant to say but thought it was that I had about 100m of corridor and bays to walk. I use to nurse on a secure unit and would send out many a patient, subject to their risk assessment.

Rek; got to be quick cos its half-term and the kids are trying to finish each other off.

Cat me if you need the car-seat thingy!

If you can get internet on your phone, can you get Skype? Does it cost while you're using the internet? I don't know how it all works, just wondering.

How old is your dd? The new baby thing worked in reverse for me with ds2 - the older dcs weren't at all fussed about the arrival of a new baby, instead they were delighted because mummy was home. It was kind of as though they were pleased with the baby for bringing mummy home. And they were also used to not having me there, and having other people (like dh) do a lot for them instead. And dh was really good at looking after them by himself, too. So actually it set us up fairly well.

The venflons drove me mad too. I had one in all the time - in the back of my hands, in the middle of my forearm (agony as it caught on everything) and in the crook of my elbow too. They were very uncomfortable and a nightmare to sleep with as I kept catching them on bedclothes, etc.

Eventually, after a couple of weeks of them in and getting blocked as they were never flushed through (making them totally useless in the event that they'd have been needed) I 'negotiated' with the midwives that I'd keep one in for 24 hours after each of my bleeds but then it would come out. It often meant me nagging midwives and bargaining with passing consultants (I usually burst into tears whilst I was asking which usually helped) but I basically kept on at them. My argument was that if they weren't being flushed and were blocked then it was totally useless having one in.

As for the carparks, my husband found out that long-stay patients could negotiate free day passes and park in the staff carpark, although this wasn't widely broadcast. It was only a sympathetic midwife who saw him heading off with his pile of £1 coins to load the machine who told him about it. So it might be worth investigating this as I'm sure they will have a policy for long-term patients.

I really feel for you. I felt totally cheated when this was happening to me as I was having a wonderful and very healthy pregnancy and was loving every moment. Aside from the bleeding, it was all going brilliantly and I felt very well (bursting with energy and happiness in fact) and instead of being able to enjoy this time like everyone else (go out and about, nest, meet friends for tea and cake, potter about...) I was holed up in hospital on my own every day, petrified about bleeds. It was awful and I felt very upset that it was happening to me. It seemed very unfair that I wasn't able to enjoy the pregnancy in a normal way.

I often felt that I became a part of the furniture in hospital, a bit of a fixture and forgotten about. Hearing myself referred to as "The lady in room 2 with the bleeds" reinforced that and I did feel a bit invisible. I also felt like a patient rather than a person and I suppose that was what I struggled with. As far as everyone was concerned, the textbook answer was to have me on bedrest in hospital and so that was what was going to happen. And yet no one really considered the impact of what five weeks in hospital in bed on your own can do to you. How upsetting and debilitating that can be. You know it minimises the risk but it doesn't make the days pass any easier or any quicker. I struggled with it hugely, although I think that was impacted by the lack of visitors I had during the day.

I'm thinking about you and I hope that things settle down. You do sound like you're having a tough time with it, which I empathise with as I had similar - it seemed like I was lurching from one bleed to the next. There are lots of stories on here from people who have been where you are so you know we are all thinking of you.
Kx

Its the worst thing in the world to be away from your children I know... I guess I was lucky in the way that we had celebrated DS1's 2ns birthday on the 2nd Feb and I went in on the 14th of Feb.
To be honest about the whole effects on the children thing.... I know it affected my DS1 lots... Even now (a year later he will remind me of it (god knows how he remembered) I guess 3 months is a long time for a 2 year old!!

I'm always so quick to remind him that I'm never going to go away again. Of course being away will affect them in some way... It was also hard because I lost all my authority with him and he wouldn't listen to a single word I said. I felt useless. If I walked out of the door he would cry and cry..

Try not to worry about how it will affect her though. I can't tell you the exact things I did but we got there eventually. He is now my bestest friend again and he has (almost forgotten) about it. I found it hard bringing DS2 home. Its hard enough having a baby in normal circumstances but to have been away for so long is sooo bad... Rek you will be fine and you will know what to do when you get home. It'll come naturally. I never did have a problem with jealousy I made sure most of my time was spent with DS1 (DS2 wouldn't know any different) we would play together and just get to know each others boundaries again.

As always Rek my thoughts are with you and your family... I hope you manage to get to 37 weeks... It will make a huge difference.

Kit I still look at heavily pregnant women and sometimes wish I could've done what they do... Walk round town and visit friends and go shopping. As i cant have anymore it fills me with sadness that it will never be me... Still I have to be thankful that we are here and safe and happy...

Lots of Love coming your way xxxxx

Hi girls. I'm worried mum-in-law of lovely Kerry (in Luton) who has been in hospital a couple of days after starting to bleed. Now knows she has placenta previa & being monitored accordingly. Just found Mumsnet & hope it's OK with you for me to eavesdrop! Dear K is 33 weeks & will be there for the duration, however long that will be! She's happy with the care as yet but after a long wait to get pregnant & plans for a home birth, this has thrown us all out of kilter. It's very comforting to read of other girls in same state or with more info than her poor old Ma-in-law has to hand!! Seems like a C-section is on the cards then. Scan yesterday told us that Babe is 4 & half lbs so that sounds good to me. This business of blocked/unchanged venflons is interesting - we are forewarned. I'm glad to get any clues as to how this will proceed & am learning a lot from your experiences. I'm 100 miles away in Norfolk so it's hard not to just pop round & see for myself how things are. Could only think to "research" the condition & glean some info somehow. Very grateful for the old email machine! Hope you are all doing well. Keep cheerful! Pray for us & cross everything, please. Glynis xxxx

aww, mumnorfolk, she's lucky to have you. Try not to worry too desperately - easier said than done and all that - lots of us have gone on to have fine and healthy babies and it's purely information you need, which you are obviously going about getting hold of. Hope kerry's doing ok, you are a fab MIL

Yep you are a great MIL... My MIL came to visit me once for around 3 minutes out of the 3 months I was there!!! She lives about 5 minutes drive from the hospital... At least I didnt have to make stupid idle conversation with her Still doesn't matter about that now

I will put your DIL Kerry on my prayer list and will keep everything crossed for a positive outcome... Bless her. Its not easy to be in hospital but I'm sure that everything will turn out fine for you all.

Have a look at my profile page and you'll see my DS2(darling son)... He will be 1 next week and is soooo worth the pain (emotional and physical). Give her the tips we've given Rek and keep in touch... If you have any questions feel free to ask...
I'm sure Rek wont mind...

Take care Glynis xxx

Hi everyone,

Glynis, it is great that you are such a caring mil, please feel free to use this thread to ask any questions or raise concerns. Does your dil have access to the Internet in hosp? If so please point her in this direction if she would like to chat to someone in the same position. This might sound a bit daft and stating the obvious, but a really important thing you can do is to support your son. My mil is a complete superstar and has been so much help to me and my dd but she is also one of the few people that my dh can really talk to and ask for help from. It is so hard for him to be worrying about me and our baby and working full time and looking after our dd and visiting the hosp all the time. In terms of placenta previa it sounds like your dil will almost certainly have a c-section, but as someone who has wanted two home births and ended up with 2 sections I would say that it is important to remember that the point of it all is the baby not the birth! I would be lying if I said I wasn't disappointed and fed up and frightened at this point but I find it helps to take a stroll to the post natal end of the ward and look at the gorgeous little bundles and remind myself that I will have one of those in (hopefully) 5 weeks. Anyway all my best wishes to you and your family, I hope that everything turns out well for you.

On a different note entirely! My phone is an iPhone, it is brilliant, Internet would be free if I had access to wireless which I don't on the ward and I do have skype on it. It is my lifeline at the moment!

Well, I had another tiny bleed yesterday, but managed to stay on the ward and successfully refused a venflon! Had a lovely visit from dd who was in a very charming mood and gave me a big cuddle reminding me how lovely it is to have dcs and how much I am looking forward to the new one arriving.

Love to everyone, rek.

Good morning all! Thank you sooooo much for yr comments & letting me into yr circle. K doesn't know about this yet but hope she will have access later today. I'm sure it will reassure her as well as pass some time. My son (DS1?)is still one of my 3 greatest gifts with DS2 Tom, (37 & 35) & all I can say to comfort you girls is - YES, it is well worth every moment of pain & waiting. You will soon forget the grotty stuff (I trust) and will have this prize to treasure (all 6' something of it in Andy's case!)The joy continues day after day, year after year. By the way, gift #3 was when Tom made me Nanna last July with arrival of his own DS Eden. I never expected to be so elated; truly comparable with becoming a Mum myself (without the birth bit!) I have him to myself one day a week and the delight increases with him too and my relationship with Tom is now on an elevated level. Know what I mean? Wonderful. I am so lucky. Now we are to receive #4, maybe a bit sooner & smaller than expected but more than welcome! Going to work now so trust you who are waiting will have a good day & do as you are told!! Spk soon. Glynis xxxx

MumNorfolk what a lovely mother in law you are! As I said in a previous email, my mother-in-law drove 200 miles to hospital to bring me soup one day and I've never forgotten it. I love her anyway as she's fab but I love her so much for that.

The venflons/canulas are an issue as they are very uncomfortable but the consultants and midwives like them sited because it theoretically removes any risk. It was explained to me (ad nauseum) that if I DID have a major, catastrophic bleed (rare, but not impossible given my continued bleeding) then my veins could 'collapse' through bloodloss and it would be very hard to locate one and mean a waste of very precious time. Their argument that a canula/venflon in place would mean that vital fluids/drugs/blood could be administered immediately as there would be instant venous access regardless of how much blood I lost.

I GOT this. I understood their argument and I did take it on board but I also struggled with wearing the canulas long-term. They became very painful, caught on clothing and bedclothes and made arm movement painful. They were also a tangible and painful reminder that I was a patient - there was literally no escaping it. As sleep was difficult already on a hospital mattress and with a giant bump and aching back, the added hassle of a sore arm and trying not to catch it on the bedclothes made sleep even more elusive and I would often wake up having caught my canula. It also felt pointless as the canulas became blocked as they weren't regularly flushed through, so had I had this major, catastrophic bleed that they kept warning me about, they wouldn't have been able to access a vein anyway. I used this as an argument a lot and negotiated my way around having one a lot of the time.

At my final, whopper bleed (which prompted my c section at 35 weeks) I had a canula put in straight away. They then sat me on the labour ward strapped to monitors whilst they paged my consultant and tried to work out what to do with me. When they evenutally tried to use the canula in the c section it turned out that it hadn't been inserted properly and had in fact missed the vein. This explained my swollen and bruised hand. It made all their leaping about over canulas rather academic.

Healthy babies are the end result and to that end, hospital care is the safest option as you have immediate access the theatre and blood/drugs should you require it. My consultant (in one of his many lectures/attempts to get me to stay in hospital) said that if I did have the catastrophic bleed he could have me in theatre in three minutes and my babies out in five. I don't doubt this and for all that I know that I was in 'the best place' in the circumstances, it didn't take away from how awful the experience was. It took me a long time to get over it and I struggled a lot with the trauma, the loneliness, the fear, the boredom. I now have wonderful 2 and a half year old twins who are healthy and absolutely none-the worse for their early arrival or all the dramas of my pregnancy; it didn't affect them one jot. So when I look back now I acknowledge that it was awful and I have every right to be p*ssed off and disappointed and traumatised that this happened to me, but I'm proud that I got through it. On my hands and knees pretty much, but I got through it and I got my daughters through it.

I'm thinking of Rek21 and MumNorfolk's daughter Kerry. We're all thinking of you.

It seems we all have something in common, kits, giggle and fruitful... We have beautiful healthy babies at the end of it... although it was traumatic for us all (and still is for you Rek and your DIL Gynis) We got their in the end! I hope our experiences gives the others a bit of relief to know that it will turn out good in the end... Well done to all of us!!!

Rek and Glynis I've no doubt that there will be happy endings for you both. You will also look back (as we do) on a major chapter in your life. Its not something you will forget easily but knowing you have a beautiful baby at the end makes it all seems worth it!!

One of the greatest things to come out of the problems I had was a realisation that I can make a difference to women in this situation (and of course other complications that arise during the antenatal period). I have been accepted (last week) into university and I begin training for my midwifery Degree in Septemeber. I honestly can't think of a more rewarding job to do. I also feel like I want to give something back! ifkwim? I'm sure that with my experiences I will be able to support pregnant women in these awful circumstances. (i hope!!)

Anyway as always my thoughts are with you Rek and Glynis (and Kerry!).
Rek you are so right about the support for your DH. We were lucky that my DH's cousin was a huge support for us by cooking him meals and helping with the housework. Also my sister who became a surrogate mum to my DS1 for 3 months!!

Lots of love and may God bless you all xxxx