need advice on whether to ask for a CS - SPD related, please help

[kitkat9]

Hi

I'm about 33w and in increasing pain from SPD, mainly in my lower back, hips and (ahem) searing pain in my ladygarden, which all makes it so hard to walk. Also have 2 dc's already so finding everything a tad horrendous just now. I'm really miserable.

Anyway, over the past week or so, as the pain has been getting worse, I've been worrying about labour for this baby - I had an horrific 1st birth experience with ds1 4 1/2 years ago, and an ok-ish delivery with dd 21 months ago - both times I had epidurals, both times the wire came out of my back. I must have a weird back. I'm feeling so scared about going through all that again, and have been thinking about asking for an elective CS.

I'm scared that the SPD will make the labour worse/harder. I'm scared of going through labour and delivery again. But I'm also scared of having a CS - I'm aware that it's a big operation, which worries me, and I'm concerned about the recovery time afterwards - we live in the USA, away from any family help, and don't really have any help over here at all.

I was badly injured after ds's birth and it took me months to recover, but as he was my first I could lie down with him for lots of the time! However, I was fine after having dd, very little recovery time.

Does anyone have any advice/experience? Please help me, the worry is consuming me, and I'm in so much pain that I'm becoming quite depressed.

bump - anyone?

You poor thing, I was exactly the same. I had a horrific first birth My labour lasted 70 hours; I only just escaped a c-section. I was exhausted and my epidural was rendered useless by the most horrific shooting pains down my legs. My son finally came out in one big plop, I was pushing so desperately. He did nothing but scream for the first 6 weeks of his life, but turned into a beautiful baby and I soon became pregnant again. At 20 weeks I got severe SPD and couldn?t walk or sit down, so had to spend 5 months lying on my side. I had exactly the pain you described and it was really awful towards the end. I planned to make my second birth better by being fitter, but suddenly I was crippled. I cried all the time, scared stiff by the thought of going through labour again. I was also incredibly depressed, as I couldn?t even walk to the park with my son. My doctor suggested counselling with a psychotherapist who dealt with traumatic births, who helped enormously and did some hypnobirthing techniques with me. I asked for a C-section as the baby was looking big and I'd heard about people who delivered big babies with SPD whoses front pubic joint had been torn and they enede up in a right mess. They refused a c section but offered to induce, I decided to wait till I was a week overdue. The day I was due to be induced, I went into labour naturally and after a remarkably quick but uncomfortable labour my second son was born in only 4 hours 9lb 14 and just gas and air. After the birth I couldn?t even stand. I was in a wheel chair, in agony and couldn?t even pick up my baby. By the next day I could stand on crutches. 3 weeks later was mothers day, I hobbled to the park and played with my son. It was heavenly. By 6 weeks I was without pain and getting back to full fitness. 9 months on I am totally fine. If your baby is looking normal or on the small side, don't worry spd will make the birth easier and quicker as your pelvis is wider. Look into positions for examinations and giving birth, like lying on your side, ask you midwife/physio for advice, I have a large tubi grip support which went around my hips which really helped. The last weeks are unbearable, but just remember you will be able to walk again. As for the c-section, I tried to persuade my husband to sell the car so we could pay for one, but he wouldn't! With two children already it will make life hard and your recovery much slower, ask to see a consultant and speak to them about it, if your baby is very large, ask for a scan, though they aren't very accurate and discuss your options. Also waterbirths are suposed to be good for SPD - we didn't have time! I think that having given birth naturally twice your labour will be fine, but i totally understand how frightening and depressing it is, just remember soon you will have a beautiful baby and it will all be worth it JUST! I hope this helps, and it all goes, let me know if you want any more advice / info.
Nicola

Nicola,

thanks for replying - Im gong to my appointment this morning so wil be discussing my options with my 'caregiver'. I had asked about a waterbirth but they aren't offered at the hospital I'll give birth at, so really I only have 2 options - normal labour and delivery or a cs. Over the past few days I've been thinking more about just going through with a normal labour labour, and preaying that the epidural will work properly this time.

I'm in agony again today - I had a couple of days last week when it wasn't as bad as normal, and I fooled myself into believeing that the baby had dropped and things were going to ease up for the remainder, but no. The pain is back with a vengeance and I feel like crawling everywhere. It's really getting into my hips now too, which is a new development, and adds to the general misery.

At the last scan I had the baby was measuring big, they put my due date up to Dec 8th rather than the 25th , so I'm expecting a big boy! Ds1 was 8lb 14, dd was 8lb 7 (15 days early) so I think it's only fair to expect there's another bruiser growing inside....certainly feels like it!

Joking aside crawling can help. A bit like the yoga cat postition on all fours slightly tilt your pelvis forward so as to slightly lift your back to flat. Not so practical for the school run or supermarket shop. I had SPD, wheelchair from 32 weeks, and a CS with DS1, induced on due date 2 days of labour and then ended up with a CS. also had an amazing physio who made an amazing difference to preventing it getting worse and rebuilding my strength after the birth. Basic advice was the classic sleep on your side with a pillow between your knees to relieve the pressure on your back. Sit on firm chairs if necessary with a cushion behind you to keep you upright and not slouching, don't push a shopping trolley or pushchair if it can be avoided - terrible pressure on hips. I had a list of exercises to do several times a day but i can't remember what they were. I also wish I'd taken paracetamol earlier as I was advised as a mild pain killer. It would have made life more comfortable and I did the last couple of weeks anyway.

I hope that your caregivers are able to find a system of management for you to get you through these last few weeks.

On the CS note with DS 1 from being in a wheelchair I was up walking the next morning (late night birth) and out of hospital within 36hrs of the birth. With DS2 (ellective CS, 2 weeks overdue) I was up within a couple of hours. It is a major op but doesn't have to leave you bed ridden. With DS2 birth DS1 was 2 and was very understanding about being picked up etc. I just had to sit down so he could climb onto my lap for cuddles for a few weeks.

Gosh that's not long to go now. The best way to keep the pain down is to move as little as possible especially when you are feeling good and it eases, not easy I know!!! especially with two others already. I'm sure your bruiser will come out quickly, you may not need a epidural, have you been to any breathing classes? If you could get some help with that it might help, it really helped me, my yoga teacher also helped with breathing if you could find one. Best of luck and remember to keep your knees together when you roll over in bed!