confidenitiality and seeing MW

[DorisIsAPinkDragon]

Hi have recent found out I am pregnant with DC3 but for a number of reasons I do not want to start telling people yet.

My problem is the doctors surgery where I live serves two villages, I know lots of people and usually see people I know when in the surgery. The surgery flashes up on a big screen who the person is going to see and their name so It will not take a rocket scientist to realise that I am pregnant when it flashes up me and the MW.

I had an appointment with the GP this am to try to book a dating scan and cvs but he was as useless as a chocolate teapot ....." I think that before 13 weeks dating scans don't really see much{hmm]!!!!!" FFS they give you a date which atm is what's important!!!!

He then said I had to make an appt with the MW hence the difficulties above.

This morning I saw a neighbour in the surgery and blamed the visit on DD2 ,

Last time I was pregnant I met another of my friends who was at her booking in scan, and really don't want to be in that position ( I obviouly kept her confidences but even so with my luck it would be the village gossip!

Sorry for the long winded and vaguely ranting post

If you're still with me any ideas????

That sounds a pain! Is the MW also the practice nurse? I'm racking my brains trying to think of why you might be seeing her. I feel annoyed on your behalf that someone might ask you why you're there! I would hate that! Perhaps if it came to it you could just say you were going for some advice on TTC, or something...?

Sorry - not much help, I know! xx

Nope sadly not MW covers several practices and only visits on certain days! Thanks for replying MsG

Could you speak to the m/w on the phone to ask her not to have your name up like this.

Do you really need to see a MW at all before 12 weeks (say) if it's not your first child? I don't think I saw mine before 16 weeks with ds2. Where would the dating scan be done in your area? I mean , could you go via your (admittedly useless) GP or direct to the hospital/ante-natal unit? Perhaps if you explain your reasons?

I think as an overall way of doing things, that's sodding appalling frankly, and it's worth talking to the practice about your problems with the system and patient confidentiality in general, and the fact that there isn't any there.

What you do in the meantime, I'm not sure. Can you ring the midwives and talk to them over the phone first, and perhaps arrange to go to a different clinic, or to the hospital?

I guess it might be worth ringing the hospital and asking if you can see your midwife there, or if they can deal with you directly to begin with - another midwife or whatever?

Think I might try a phone appt first, as don't need to see her just need a dating scan ....truly have no idea of dates, and without an Idea of dates CVS becomes less realistic.

Reason for CVS is that DD2 has cystic fibrosis, if we miss the window for cvs 10-12 week i think ( or thereabouts please correct me if I'm wrong) we would have to wait for an amnio which take much longer to get results back on, which given the wait already I want to know as soon as I can as I can't get remotely attached until then.....

PS I know cvs etc is an emotive subject on pregnancy boards which I why I was vague earlier.

Does your MW do home visits? Here the MW does all the booking in appointments as home visits which is very convenient.

If not, I would have thought for patient confidentiality you should be able to explain to the receptionist that you don't want the whole waiting room to know that you are seeing the midwife, so can you be called out by her rather than on the board?

I'm shocked that this hasn't been a problem at the practice already. Surely they must have had a teenage girl pregnant, or someone who needs an abortion, or just someone who doesn't want the whole world to know their business? I second the vote for asking for a home visit.

I was nervous going to my first antenatal appointment as DH was with me and the MWs and HVs are in a different section. I was planning to blame DD1 if we were "caught". Not half as bad as your situation though. (And incidentally, I don't think that anyone would judge you for wanting CVS in your circumstances).

Just spoken to a v. nice receptionist (they do exsist) she has asdded a note to my booking not to be called for via the screen so hopefully will avoid problems!

Thankyou all for your replies I couldn't think straight as I was so worried....

Glad to hear it got sorted out, I can't believe its not something the surgery has had to deal with before!

CVS by the way - I had mine at 13+6 and was told I had it on the last possible day (but the later the better in terms of mc rate apparently ...)!