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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Original poster

Early pregnancy

9 replies

BusyPlumSloth · 18/08/2026 08:15

I am 5 weeks pregnant (24) with my boyfriend (28) who we have only been together 2 months so has been a complete shock to say the least. It’s been an amazing 2 months and I basically live with him at his house. We’ve spent a lot of time together and grew very close in a short amount of time and to say the least I am very much in love with this person and see myself with him for the foreseeable. We deal with stresses already very well and our communication is very strong. We have spoken about the pregnancy and I really believed I would be able to have an abortion as we both spoke and felt it wasn’t the right time for either of us. I have spoken to the midwife and began the process but I don’t think I can go through with it. I realised it’s not what I want and even tho I know it’s going to be hard I can’t physically go through with the abortion. It doesn’t feel right. I explained this to him and felt awful as I know it’s not just changing my life but it’s changing his as-well but he has said he wants to support me no matter what and even tho he will find it hard, we’re a team and we can make it work. We spoke about how it would be once we had the baby and he said he wouldn’t want me away from him and he knows exactly how he wants to raise his kids which makes me feel really relieved knowing and trusting he will always be there. I know it’s such early days and anything can happen and that petrifies me but it’s not scaring me enough to go through with termination. Is there anyone who’s gone through similar and it’s worked out or not worked out or just some friendly advice and comfort would be massively appreciated.

thanks so much :)

OP posts:
user1492757084 · 18/08/2026 08:21

Keep seeing excellent health professionals, take all the tests and all the advice.
Keep your career going strong.

Talk about your situation with your parents and closest support people.
Do what is best for you.

rubyslippers · 18/08/2026 08:23

You barely know him and barely started a relationship
you have no idea what the future holds
I wouldn’t continue the pregnancy in your circumstances
I would 100% keep talking to health care professionals and people you can trust

Original poster
BusyPlumSloth · 18/08/2026 08:42

I am aware we are very very early days and like I said anything can happen, however I am fully aware of that and feel I can still continue even if I was to be on my own.

OP posts:
Flyingdolphins · 18/08/2026 09:05

I think if have a solid support network and are fully prepared to be a single mum if it came to that, and your gut is telling you to keep the baby then of course keep it but be very prepared for the reality of going it alone.

Two months is still very much in the honeymoon phase. Ive been in a relationship that seemed so perfect and I dreamed of having kids with this guy. He turned out to be an emotionally, financially and sexually manipulative arsehole but didn't reveal this about himself until at least 18months in...

Obviously I really hope this isn't the case for you but just keep your eyes open. Having a baby is extremely challenging even in the strongest and longest of relationships.

rubyslippers · 18/08/2026 10:04

BusyPlumSloth · 18/08/2026 08:42

I am aware we are very very early days and like I said anything can happen, however I am fully aware of that and feel I can still continue even if I was to be on my own.

You will be linked to him if you have his child
if he’s decent then but if not then it’s a mess
so many threads on MN about stuff like this
You do not know him at all

Stegosaur · 18/08/2026 10:05

The truth is that you can't know anything real at all about someone you have only known for two months (assuming you haven't been friends for five years before getting together or something like that). He could be an excellent actor. Or he might be genuinely nice. You just can't know either way, however much you feel you know him.

With that in mind, decide whether to keep the baby based on how well you would manage alone. Do you have helpful family nearby? Do you have a decent job which would be able to flex around childcare after maternity leave finishes? What is childcare like in your area and how much does it cost? Assume he won't contribute anything financially, and work out a budget based on just your income. Can you make it work?

poachy · 18/08/2026 10:15

I think there are two main, separate issues for you. Youve decided you can’t go through with a termination, and this is absolutely fine. Many women have made a situation like this work and thrived in their lives despite the challenges. It’s ok to be scared, almost every woman is in the early stages of pregnancy, planned or unplanned.

The other issue is that you are young and in a very new relationship. In your post you are focusing on how great it’s been, and it’s great he’s saying the right things. Let’s hope that continues. But I think you have to have a practical attitude to the relationship, knowing it may turn out well but it may not. You need to mentally imagine raising a child alone as well as in this relationship. It sounds like you are considering this and again, understandable to have fears. Just keep talking to people around you and don’t sugar coat anything that’s not ok in the relationship, because of the pregnancy.

And if you are firmly decided about your pregnancy, allow yourself to feel excited and happy about it! Congratulations.

BePinkWriter · 18/08/2026 11:00

Stegosaur · 18/08/2026 10:05

The truth is that you can't know anything real at all about someone you have only known for two months (assuming you haven't been friends for five years before getting together or something like that). He could be an excellent actor. Or he might be genuinely nice. You just can't know either way, however much you feel you know him.

With that in mind, decide whether to keep the baby based on how well you would manage alone. Do you have helpful family nearby? Do you have a decent job which would be able to flex around childcare after maternity leave finishes? What is childcare like in your area and how much does it cost? Assume he won't contribute anything financially, and work out a budget based on just your income. Can you make it work?

Excellent response and advice!

JustMeSimply · 18/08/2026 13:21

Well happened me and dh first month together and never considered termination, and 13 years on still very happy together and married and more kids. We both just knew the day we met we had found the right person

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