Was it appropriate for the receptionist to ask if I wanted to keep it?

[TiredmrsB]

Hi!

So recently found out I am pregnant with my second. Phoned my GP practice to book booking appointment, only way we can do it where I am! I told the receptionist that I was pregnant and wanted to book with the midwives for a booking appointment. One of the first things I was asked was "do you want to keep it".

This is my 4th pregnancy, 2 of which were miscarriages and this is first time I have had this from a receptionist.

Is this a common to ask? Its not until ive thought about it afterwards that I feel this was actually really insensitive to people who have suffered losses or have struggled to conceive.

Considering putting a complaint in with the practice as I just dont feel that was the right time for that question!

It’s a different appointment if you didn’t. She was doing her job and you are massively overthinking. Let it go and move on.

It would be even more insensitive to do a full booking in appointment with someone who didn’t want to keep it.

A complaint? They were literally making sure you got the right kind of appointment. I would not complain.

Eh? This isn't a normal question to ask from a receptionist. Most women aren't asking for a booking appointment with a midwife if they are planning an abortion. And even if they are, it's not the bloody receptionists place to ask!

She needs to know why you are phoning the doctor to advise of your pregnancy. The other appointment would be much more urgent.

As op said, she asked for a booking app with the midwife?

it’s a weird question to ask op esp when asking for the booking app

No, I don't think it is a normal question to ask and not something I've ever been asked. Surely if you did not want to you would state that, otherwise it is presumed that you are planning to go ahead.

I don’t think it’s normal because if you ‘didn’t want to keep it’ you wouldn’t be booking a midwife appointment it would be somewhere different….

regardless the way she phrased it is insensitive. A better way to phrase it would be ‘was this a planned pregnancy’ or something similar

I'm guessing she wanted to check it was an actual booking in appointment, maybe they have had people in the past turn up for the midwives wanting an abortion. However it's a bit blunt to just come out with it like that! She needs to add a bit of context as to why she is asking, likely a reasonable question asked in an unreasonable way.

Well she must have been asking for a specific reason, it’s not like she was just prying for the sake of it.

Not sure why it constitutes a complaint? Why did the question bother you so much?

I think that is out of order - OP didn't just say she wanted to speak to someone because she was pg, she said she wanted a booking appointment with a midwife! I've done that with my dc and was never asked this question

Totally inappropriate! Definitely complain.

No receptionist should be asking you that! wtf.

Very inappropriate in my view.

Inappropriate. As a recurrent miscarriage sufferer I'd have been devastated if I'd have been asked that. Also, none of her business.

It’s not a normal thing to ask if you’re phoning for a booking in appointment with a midwife! You wouldn’t do that if you were planning on terminating.

Absolutely not the point. There are ways of ascertaining who a pregnant woman sees without asking that question.

Inappropriate and offensive

As a person who has suffered many miscarriages I would have understood it is her job to ascertain what kind of appointment I needed and wouldn’t have felt upset at all. Totally her business aA she is the one making the appointments for the doctor.

That would only make sense if OP hadn't requested a midwife appointment not a doctor one and specifically said booking in