Staying with partner to have a baby after past cheating at 35

[Sweetie28x]

Would you stay in a relationship that you was unhappy in just to have a child of you were 35. If you found out youre partner has cheated on you 2 years ago. He dosent know that I know. I fell like if you get into the dating scene again you have to find soemoen quickly and its really stresfull. Would you ever consider having a child alone thrue a sperm donor?

Why would you want to bring a child into an unhappy home and eventually put that child through their parents separation? Why is that even an option?!

Hope you've had an Sti test. Other then that, good luck, you'll need it.

The question is actually to you, OP.
Do you think its morally right to knowingly give a child a father where you already have evidence that he is untrustworthy, unwilling to admit mistakes, puts women's health at risk, unwilling to make hard decisions (to leave a partner rather than have an affair), and doesnt treat people with respect, honestly or integrity?
Do you think a man with those qualities will be a good father to a child, a good role model?
Do you think its right to give a child a father who you know you will most likely break up with at some point in a situation where you will be distressed and impact the child? Its one thing being a realist that a relationship might not last, but to knowingly put an innocent child into a situation where thats highly likely?

I actually clicked stay, much against the grain.

my children have been my greatest joy and I have a less than ideal husband (unknown at the time). I wouldn’t go back and risk it all again for no children

I think becoming a mum starts before conception especially if it’s planned, I don’t think it’s a good choice as a mum to bring a child into a relationship that is unstable.

There's 3 aspects to this in my opinion... do you plan in staying with your partner? Even though you know he has previously cheated so there's potential for it to happen again in the future? Are you going to forgive and forget (every instance?)?

Separately, do you actually want him to father your child? Like realistically is he a good role model for a child?

Last one, I think solo parenting by choice is becoming more prevalent as women who want to become mothers do so before the body clock runs down and they haven't met the right person for whatever reason. I genuinely admire these people. My own aunt actually had a child by sperm donor (she is a lesbian but has remained single) almost 30 years ago!

I certainly think if people are in the position to have kids solo, that's a better option than having a kid with a prick and and ultimately the relationship breaking down in the future anyway.

I could never stay with someone who cheated.

I met my partner when I was 36, nearly 37, fell pregnant at 38 and had my son at 39. I was fully prepared to go the sperm donor route if I hadn't met him.

Please don't let your age cloud your judgement.