When did you tell your kids?

[Lyndsey8880]

Hi all,
Just had my scan today at 12+2. Everything looks good thankfully.
Just wondering when you all told your other children?? I have a 4 year old daughter, I was going to take her to a private scan at 16 weeks, but everyone at the hospital was like - ohhh you should tell her tonight, and now they've put the idea in my mind... 😂😂
So that was all, when did you tell your other kids and how old were they?

At 16+0.
They were 14 and 11.
I remember it was around that time also then we had 2nd and 1st were told.

I wouldn't tell a 4 year old yet unless you are ill with your pregnancy, it's long time to your due date in a 4 year old's life

I wouldn't tell a 4 Yr old just yet because they'll just make it seem sooooo long asking loads of questions 😂😂 6 more months is a long time for a 4yr old to have to wait.

But also, congrats 👏 💖

I’d tell them when I was ready for them to proceed to tell everybody else they see!

Yeah i guess it is a bit early 😂
I dont mind who knows now, and my concern is that I'm very obviously showing - plus the family all know, and I feel like I'm keeping this big secret from her and I feel a bit bad about it, like she's the only one who doesnt know... which isn't true, my nieces and nephews don't know, but this will be her baby brother or sister and I guess I just have a bit of mum guilt..
Thanks though, puts things into perspective!

For what it’s worth I have my 12 week scan in just over a week (horrible wait!) and planning on telling my nearly 4 year old that evening if everything is okay. Like you, other people in the family know and I feel like she should too, plus I’m getting a little bump now.

I will be telling my 3 year old after 12 week scan as I will be sharing it with everyone else and I want him to be the first to know.

I have a 4 year old, I’m 10 weeks now and we told him about 2 weeks ago. He’s been sworn to secrecy (and is doing incredibly well!!) I was extremely poorly with him though, so wanted to prepare for a bad pregnancy, but also he’s so excited which just makes us so happy. He cannot wait and it’s just adorable. Although I have made it clear it’s a long way to go and he’ll be at school before the baby arrives!!

I didn’t tell my 3 (very nearly 4) year old until a couple of weeks after the 20 week scan. It’s a long time to wait, and I wanted to be as sure as possible that all was well as I really didn’t want to run the risk of having told them the news and then potentially losing the baby.

However, they were totally oblivious to me being pregnant despite me having a very visible bump from around 16 weeks, and they had never asked for a sibling or expressed any particular interest in babies, so I can imagine potentially feeling differently if that hadn’t been the case.

I told DD very early on, because she's 8 and I was doing IVF, and she could see the injection bruises so knew something was going on. I think being straight with children is quite a good thing. It meant that when I had a bleed in week 9 and had to be monitored, I could just simply explain to her that it was a bit sad and the baby might not be ok (it was!), rather than trying to hide it from her. And that way she will grow up knowing it's not a big deal; pregnancy is complicated but you can talk about it if you want to.