39 weeks scared to give birth

[LolaBumble]

Second baby and I’ve been so busy and focused on the logistics, It’s just hit me that I actually need to give birth!

Any tips or resources that you guys have found helpful for staying calm? I cant even get my head around childbirth, how does the baby fit out of there! Just want it over with now, I am finding the anticipation of it awful.

Is this a VBAC op? Or second natural delivery? If so your labour will likely be shorter, particularly the active phase. Guessing you have your birth plan either for elective section or PV delivery?

It's pretty normal for the second pregnancy to be a blurr, depending on how old your dc1 is, I had a toddler so I didn't stop until I literally had dc2,. Totally get how you feel. What helped you the first time round?

Women's bodies are amazing, OP. That small cervix expands to get a whole baby out.

How far along are you?

If your actually asking how does the baby come down the birth canal, there's YouTube buds, the baby's skull plates slide over each other, your cervix dilated and softens and your ligaments soften a while before hand. DC1 will have widened the birth canal a bit but having an active birth rather than a lying down position will move your tail bone out of the way and open the pelvis to aid delivery. I'm autistic so I'm not sure if that was a general "omg a human is coming out of where????" Or an actual question about the physiology of childbirth x

*YouTube vids not buds (do not type tired!)

Here is what the OP actually asked:

Any tips or resources that you guys have found helpful for staying calm?

had my second last year and was bloody terrified after a traumatic 1st birth, things that not only helped but gave me a peaceful and dare I say it, enjoyable birth

up breathing, google and have a read up, this was genuine pain relief

after every contraction telling myself “right, that one’s done and I never have to do it again”

knowing that 4 rounds of up breathing is a contraction

feeling the peak of the contraction and feeling it tail off, again “that’s another one done”

staying calm, the fear-tension-pain cycle really screwed me up in my first birth

floppy face=floppy fanny, awful expression but it’s so true, stay as soft as you can

sway, I swayed and it became like a pendulum for counting the up breathing

only make low noises, every sound and movement stay focused on getting baby down

feeling excited that my baby was so close to being in my arms, we were doing this together

hope they help, I honestly was were you are now and ended up doing it completely drug free, not saying that to brag but I was amazed that these things genuinely helped with pain relief. You’ve got this OP

I cant even get my head around childbirth, how does the baby fit out of there!

....op also wrote the above..I was asking /trying to help.

Thank you this has actually been very helpful!!

Second vaginal, so hoping it will be quicker!

First time around I was just head in the sand and total ignorance before, which helped the anticipation and pregnancy but I was panicking during the birth and remember feeling out of control!

Thank you for all your replies!🫶

I found my second a lot better because I had a sense of “oh yeah I remember this sensation” whereas with my first it was more “what the fuck is happening”

I don't have any tips but I think it's absolutely normal to be terrified. I was with both of mine.
All the best and congratulations. X

I was more scared the second time after a horrendous last hour giving birth to my first baby.

i was blissfully unaware going into the first labour but second time around you know roughly what you are going to face. However 2nd time around was more relaxed, less panic and my midwife was exceptional!

Thank you for saying that. Hopefully I’ll feel the same. I remember being terrified of the actual pushing part during the contractions, but I actually found that part less painful. When the pushing starts I’m just going to try and tell myself ‘home straight’

I think reducing stress and panic really helps. With dc2 I laboured at home until nearly 7cm (that wasn’t planned), but what I did was count during each contraction, they were tending to last around 40 seconds, so when I reached the count of 20 I knew it was reducing and in the way out, and this made it much easier to tolerate. I also found that when each contraction started, I wanted to get off the bed, and felt the need to walk to the sink (we had an en-suite), and stand over the sink holding on, leaning forward, while counting the contraction length. So that’s what I did for about four hours - got up with each contraction (they were about 5 mins apart), walked to the sink and stood over it, while counting. Then when it finished I lay down again. I think walking / standing over the sink while trying to ‘open everything up’ down below (instead of squeezing everything tight in a panic) possibly helped speed things along. Overall labour, and active phase, were quicker second time round. Good luck :)