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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Original poster

Not enjoying pregnancy

11 replies

NewMummy280 · 15/08/2025 13:03

I am almost scared to write this but want to know it is normal to feel how I do. For context I have pcos , have previously miscarried and have wanted baby for so long. Without ‘trying’ I am now 12 weeks pregnant with my partner. Prior to baby I had intended on parting ways and splitting from him but as we both wanted a child for the whole of our relationship we have agreed to try and continue. I have had a terrible first trimester , unbearable sickness , unable to eat or do anything of which doctors have been no help. I feel pregnancy has always been glamourised and whilst everyone knows the actual birth is no walk in the park I didn’t know id get no respite. I know I still have a while to go and hope it gets better. I don’t want to be ungrateful, I just wonder if anyone else has been in this boat and light at the end of the tunnel . To top all this off he has a very controlling ex wife and i am currently petrified of what her actions will be. He has a child from that marriage. I haven’t told anyone yet waiting for my scan in a couple of days , could be loneliness making matters worse but thought I would reach out to you all as you seem so helpful and lovely. Thank you for any comments

OP posts:
Wednesdayonline · 15/08/2025 13:23

Have you managed to get anti sickness medication from the doctor? Really important to push for this if you have been struggling to eat or drink.
I started feeling better at 13 weeks and it's been very slowly better since then, so there definitely is hope. The first trimester is really rough for a lot of people x

LavaHoover · 15/08/2025 13:24

It's very normal to hate pregnancy. It's totally shit. A few women sail through, but I would guess the majority hate at least one part of it. If not the sickness then the PGP/piles/constipation/bloating at the other end of pregnancy.
Sorry! But at least you're not alone...

Mumofsoontobe3 · 15/08/2025 13:27

It is very normal and ok to not enjoy being pregnant. I didn't, with all 3 of mine. Relentless sickness, heartburn, over emotional, angry, sad, you name it. Couldn't eat properly, but my children were worth it a thousand times over. It doesn't invalidate how hard it was, go to your GP for anti sickness meds, rest, take care of yourself and eat whatever it is you can keep down. I hate to say it because I hated hearing it too, but try to eat little and often. Feeling hungry & nauseous at the same time is awful. I hope the remainder of your pregnancy goes well x

Pennyroses · 15/08/2025 13:29

Hi, I completely relate to and sympathize with this. I'm currently 10 weeks with a very wanted baby. I lost a baby at 19 weeks in November 2023 and had been trying ever since. This pregnancy so far has been so hard, I've been so sick and not able to leave the house or anything. It's debilitating and so isolating, I'm actually feeling pretty depressed and thinking what have I done?!! My partner isn't the most understanding either, I feel like he's getting fed up of me being so sick but I'm so fed up too!!! Doesn't help that his brothers partner is also pregnant, she's a few weeks ahead of me and absolutely fine! So he can't understand why I'm not 🙄 sorry no advice but just wanted to let you know you're not alone, I'm just praying things get better in a few weeks 🙏🏼

PurpleTurtleMoose · 15/08/2025 13:32

Pregnancy can be so difficult, and there's nothing wrong with not enjoying that. It doesn't mean you're ungrateful or don't want the baby, it just means the process of getting there can be really rough.

I had horrendous morning sickness throughout the first trimester and beyond, and we're not wrong for not finding that enjoyable. It's really, really tough.

I will say it does get better. I'm approaching 38 weeks now which comes with its own symptoms, but the morning sickness in the earlier stages was by far the worst for me.

Give yourself a break. This can be a difficult road and it's entirely natural not to enjoy certain elements.

Xx

Coconutter24 · 15/08/2025 14:12

Could you feel like this because your are settling? You had planned on parting ways before the pregnancy but now you’re here giving it a go. Do you want to be with him or do you think you should because you’re now pregnant?
As for the sickness etc, the first few weeks are rough and not many people enjoy the first trimester, hopefully it gets better for you

Bullzeye · 15/08/2025 21:28

I sympathise with the sickness, I am 13 weeks and feel depressed with my pregnancy. It's my second baby and very much wanted however had thoughts of termination due to severe morning sickness. There is no sign of improvement for me yet but I am hopeful it will get better soon. Like you, I can't eat and struggle to drink. My saving grace for fluids was lucozade sport, diet coke (caffeine free) and full sugar lemonade. It's hell... Hang in there it'll get better.

questionthethought · 15/08/2025 21:30

OP you aren’t the first and you certainly won’t be the last to feel this way. Don’t worry. I didn’t enjoy pregnancy both times, and what helped me was accepting that not everyone likes it. I found that accepting I felt that way took the pressure off me trying to “enjoy it”. The good thing is you know it’s temporary, it will end, and you’ll be so proud of yourself at the end of it.

Periperi2025 · 15/08/2025 21:40

I had unrelenting nausea and a fairly unsupportive/ disinterested H (DD 7 now and we are going through a divorce).

I didn't enjoy pregnancy. It was miserable, and worse still was friends and aquaintances using my pregnancy as an excuse to reminisce about how wonderful theirs were.

One bit of advice i would give is, think who the people are that you will tell if you were to miscarry again and tell them now that you are pregnant, no point keeping it a secret from those close friends until after the scan, get their support now.

Also, read up the RCOG and NICE guidelines on nausea and vomiting in pregnancy and get someone who can advocate for you to go to the GP with you and demand some cyclizine (take a print off of the guidelines with you to show you mean business).

Georgia324 · 15/08/2025 22:29

Pregnancy is generally pretty awful and even worse if you have severe morning sickness. I agree with others - you should be on meds for sickness. There is an amazing med called Xonvea - get your GP to prescribe it and I am sure it will help hugely. I took it from 7-22 weeks. Things will get better but then the third trimester is rubbish again for different reasons & it's ok to hate it! Nothing js as bad as HG/severe sickness though. Get to your GP on Monday morning and fingers crossed for your scan milestone xx

Sunaquarius · 16/08/2025 08:59

I'm can't speak for the relationship issues you are having but any relationship issues will always be made worse by pregnancy!

Honestly pregnancy can such a shock, especially your first, it is nothing like I imagined. I had HG in all of my pregnancies but it did become more bearable by about 14-16 weeks. It should improve for you soon.

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