Does stress cause miscarriage?

[Amby99]

Online it says there is no proven correlation but everyone around me is telling me not to stress and to just relax. I’m 8 weeks pregnant and my now fiance is stressed at the thought or glimpse of me getting a little bit ‘stressed’.

we are planning a last minute wedding for this autumn (very small, max 30 guests) and I will admit that I had anticipated at least 1 year of planning but due to the pregnancy things have understandably had to speed up.

My partner doesn’t want me getting stressed or emailing venues, because he’s worried if they say they don’t have availability - he thinks I’ll get stressed and upset

I explained I wouldn’t but that I do feel like I need to have some control in my wedding planning and said that emailing venues to get a date would actually comfort me.

It’s very sweet - he seems to want to do everything between him and his best man and said I should entrust stuff to a bridesmaid (which I’ll do once I find a venue) and when I know an exact date.

So typing this - maybe I’m not stressed but maybe I feel overwhelmed. Is this going to cause harm to the baby? Fiance seems so worried about it and it’s making me worry that he thinks I’m harming our baby with just being overwhelmed

Only the most extreme stress, like unable to eat/sleep style stress may have an impact. But even that is only a maybe. Remember babies are born in war zones and terrible situations. If feeling stressed/overwhelmed caused a miscarriage then nobody would ever need an abortion, for example.

It's probably good to stay calm in terms of blood pressure and things, but mild stress in terms of being able to make arrangements shouldn't be an issue!

Sounds like he's the one getting stressed, not you!

Honesty, people have babies in war zones. It is extremely unlikely that stress in itself will cause a miscarriage.

Babies are born in war zones every day! He doesn’t seem sweet he seems quite performative.

You’re 8 weeks pregnant and you’ve changed the date of your wedding already?

It seems to me that it is your fiancé who is causing you stress

I was 5 months pregnant and arranged my wedding.

Id have felt embarrassed others arranging my wedding simply because I was pregnant

How does he think you’ll cope when the baby is actually out and doing baby things that cause intense stress? Does he think you’re incompetent at other times? I’d be annoyed at him for assuming you can’t function. Is he even going to plan the wedding you want?

as above, my midwife told me when I was getting stressed (with more than arranging a wedding) that babies were born in auschwitz and war zones. Your baby will be fine.

So if this theory is true, it is saying that I caused my 7 miscarriages by being “stressed”.
What a load of rubbish, I refuse to accept the horrific guilt that statement brings.

kindly, as you can imagine, I was extremely anxious throughout my pregnancies wanting each of them to bring me my desperately long awaited child. I did not cause any of my miscarriages.

I still managed to get on with life, nothing stopped because I was pregnant.

Can I ask, will your fiance blame you if this pregnancy doesn’t go as you wish? what will their reaction be?

My advice is don’t let anyone dictate to you what you should and should not be doing just because you are pregnant. And please, dismiss this utter bollocks crap openly to whoever says it to you.

My daughter was born healthy and full term after a pregnancy that included a parent’s terminal illness and death.
Think how stressed some people with unwanted pregnancies are -- they still need abortions, they don’t just miscarry.

Can confirm that despite 4 miscarriages (caused by sticky blood, not stress) and 2 incredibly stressful successful pregnancies with more injections, medications, hospital admissions, foetal medicine referrals redundancies and a rented house that literally fell down around me the babies managed the stress pretty well.

At least three friends of mine in Israel have conceived and gestated babies while rockets are firing down on them from Gaza and Iran, so I’d say you’ll be good. Maybe tell this to your partner to knock some sense into him.

He needs to get a grip, because HE is making you worry.

By "now fiance" do you mean you got engaged because you were pregnant?

If so, and because of the behaviours he's now showing, I'd be worried that he is controlling.

He doesn’t sound sweet. He sounds batshit at best and controlling at worst. Please talk to him and explain that stress won’t impact the baby and that he needs to stop trying to wrap you up in cotton wool. If he refuses to listen I’d seriously be thinking about the future of the relationship. His demands could potentially get a lot worse. Let’s hope it’s just hapless new dad concerns. But get this all nipped in the bud OP!

No is the simple answer to your original question, as demonstrated by the research you mention.

Forget a miscarriage - if someone tried to force me into a chair and make me relax for 9 months, I would be more at risk of a murder charge!

If stress caused miscarriage then almost nobody would have a second child because there is almost nothing more stressful than that first baby.

He's concerned that's all. Tell him you're fine and point out all the women who work in very high pressured jobs right through pregnancy and all those babies who are conceived in high-stress circumstances.

There were studies done on women involved in the 911 terror attacks who were pregnant and it was only women in the third trimester that were impacted. In these cases the babies were born with slightly raise cortisol levels - evolutionary you would want a baby in those situations born a bit more aware of danger. This only really happens with extreme imminent risks to life levels of stress.

Last year I had two miscarriages in low stress situations. I went through redundancy in Jan/Feb and went through a stressful time and found out I was pregnant the same day I found I was made redundant and this is the pregnancy that stuck. I'm now 30 weeks!

Thank you all for your replies! Very reassuring and I thought that to be the case. I think because he knows I am prone to becoming stressed and anxious very easily (even when I’m not pregnant)) he just doesn’t want me to FEEL stressed. I’m actually relieved that he wants to take part in wedding planning, usually he is horizontally laid back.

Thanks all. X