Placenta Previa - help!

[aflint]

Hey ladies! Has anybody else has placenta previa, and had the placenta return to its correct position?

Backstory here: I am planning on having a home birth after an incredibly traumatic loss in hospital during COVID - this will be my first live child, a son, after five losses. I really don't want to have a c section due to the placenta previa, as being at the hospital just terrifies me. I'm 22 weeks currently, I will find out at 32 weeks if the placenta has returned to its normal spot. Due to the PTSD caused by the hospital incident, I really am living in fear of having a c section- the nurses were just awful when I lost my last baby due to a missed miscarriage, I had an MVA with no pain relief and got gaslit terribly, the doctor had latched onto the side of my uterus with the vacuum and ripped a hole- was forced to leave as soon as the procedure was done as I was told I couldn't stay in the hospital due to COVID- waited for a lift stood outside the hospital for an hour, my legs covered in blood, a hole ripped in my uterus, holding my baby in an ice cream tub from their staff room, and I had contracted an infection that left me bed bound for two weeks. I simply do not trust hospitals anymore and I am FREAKING OUT!

So sorry you’ve had such a traumatic experience. I had placenta previa (completely covering the cervix) and by the 32 week scan it had shifted completely. My midwife said it does in 9/10 cases so please keep hope! But also, if I may suggest that given sometimes it doesn’t it might be worth working through some of your fears with a therapist? I found it helpful ahead of my labour. Your fears are valid but I hope you can work through them to give you the most positive experience. Wishing you all the best

I'm so sorry for your losses, and that you had such an awful experience. I can understand your worry.

The majority of placenta previa cases resolve, however it very much depends on the location of the placenta. Hopefully you have a nice, understanding community midwife you can talk to about your concern and how much your past experience is affecting you, please speak to them and ask for support with this.

Sending you lots of positive vibes that the placenta is well clear of your cervix at the next scan.

Most cases do resolve but if it doesnt, you will bleed to death attempting a home birth. So you need to get some therapy pretty damn quickly so that you've got the best chance of protecting your mental health in this delivery. Sorry to hear of the treatment and your previous loss - it is possible to move forward with this trauma x

I have had therapy btw I should have said- I completed 3 separate 12 week courses of CBT over the course of five years :) I can't cure PTSD unfortunately, it never goes away, it just becomes manageable by avoiding triggers- and I obviously can't avoid it this time unfortunately! :(

No. Had many bleeds and had emergency C-Section at 34 weeks. Bleeds started at 27 weeks and spent most of the next 7 weeks in hospital.

Sorry to hear of Your loss if I have the same condition luckily by 32 weeks placenta shifted and I gave birth naturally hopefully will be the same for you

I’m so very sorry for what you have been through. My placenta praevia did not resolve and I was admitted after my 34 week scan and was scheduled for an elective caesarean at 38 weeks. I was anxiously but as I still had a full placenta praevia there was absolutely nothing else to be done so I adjust had to accept it and all went well.
An elective caesarean can be a very calm, straightforward procedure in these circumstances. It is what your baby needs. It is the only thing you can do and as their mother, you will get through it, for your baby, because that’s what mothers do. You will need support. Please tell every midwife and healthcare professional you meet about your situation. Let everyone know why you need their support. I’m sure you have been brave over and over again in your journey to becoming a mother. This is another step.

You absolutely can be cured of PTSD

I had three separate courses of CBT and was told that due to the complex nature of my C-PTSD, I'd have to avoid the trigger to avoid panic attacks - indefinitely - I can agree with this as I went three years without a panic attack, and had one upon entering the hospital for my 12 week scan. There is unfortunately no more work I can do on myself, I have to stick to my grounding techniques and avoid the triggers. My fear of the hospital is based in reality - terrible care from the hospital workers who were supposed to care for me, nothing will calm this fear.

Genuinely worried I will not be able to force myself into a hospital- perhaps for an hour for a scan, not for four whole days. I'm terrified. I don't know what to do now. I wouldn't have tried again knowing I'd have to put myself through this again, but I was assured by my GP that the home birth team would be made available to me- I'm horrified.

have you looked into EMDR? Would hopefully be more effective than CBT.
that’s incredibly traumatic what you’ve been through, what you could really do without is adding more trauma by putting yourself in danger with a home birth when it’s not a viable option.
could you at least hire a private midwife for your home birth?

The private home birth midwife was the plan- I'll need a c section though if it doesn't move back, or I'll basically bleed to death if I try to birth vaginally. Regretting getting pregnant now, even though I adore my boy already- going to the hospital again and putting myself back in that position is guaranteed to put me back in the dark place. I'm convinced I'm going to die either way.

Oh lovely you reallllly need to address this again somehow before you bring a child into the world. You deserve to enjoy being a mum, your baby deserves to have a well mum.
please seek some help, I know you’ve done therapy before but it clearly wasn’t effective enough x

Did you find the CBT helpful? It works really well for some but it's really personal, it could be worth trying other methods/practitioners. Hypnosis/self-hypnosis, EMDR, normal talking psychotherapy, even seeing a religious counsellor if that's part of your life?
For me the problem with CBT is that the goal is to address irrational fears/negative thoughts, but it's totally rational for you to not trust hospitals! Hopefully there is a way for you to feel safer or more at peace using a hospital if you need it, without trying to drown out your past experience.
If things don't change and you do need to use a hospital, could you hire a doula or bring in extra friends/family for support? Could you bring the private midwife you're planning your home birth with, so that you have someone trained, aware, and equipped to advocate for you within the maternity system?
I'm sure you don't want to schedule any extra visits but you could maybe email and request a phone call with the head/deputy head of midwifery to find out what support they can offer? Have someone call on your behalf? Request a phone call with a different hospital and see if any are more reassuring/willing to work with you? Or maybe going to a larger/smaller hospital could make the environment feel slightly different?
As others have said, you have good odds of it resolving on its own. I sincerely hope you're part of the 9/10 and you birth your beautiful baby safe at home. Best of luck to you.

I'm so sorry for your horrific experience, that must have been truly awful.

I don't know anything about placenta previa, but with the trauma, try to remember how many women have a c section or other treatment etc in the hospital you would be in, and everything goes absolutely fine. It's so hard being the person that has had that horrific experience and has to shoulder the trauma and live with it forever. But I've found grounding myself and reminding myself that I am an exception, and that 99.9% of people will not deal with such experiences, helps me to go back when needed (even if avoiding the circumstances is my first choice).

My trauma is very different from yours, but I definitely feel for you and can understand why you're reluctant for a hospital based birth. It is still the safest place if you are at any risk of complications. Please don't take this as diminishing your experience or how you are feeling, I am absolutely not, just trying to reassure you in the only way I know how xx