What do you love about being a boy mum?

[unexpectedlyexpectingaboy]

Hello everyone,

I’m hoping for some perspective and maybe some encouragement. I am currently pregnant with a boy. If I’m honest, I feel a bit stuck — I can’t seem to see the positives of having a boy, and I wondered if anyone who has been in a similar position could share their experiences and maybe help me see it differently.

To me, having a boy just feels… a bit disappointing. Of course I want a healthy baby — but emotionally I was really hoping for a girl.

I’ve tried to think of the upsides (of specifically a boy, not of having a baby) but keep coming back to what I see as downsides, and I’d love to hear if others see things differently or have found unexpected positives.

Some of the downsides I see (and I’m not saying these are universal — just how it feels to me right now):

1. Boys seem louder, rougher, more physical — more trips to A&E, more mess, more noise.
2. Boys seem to drift emotionally as they grow, especially when they marry and focus on their wife’s family.
3. The closeness and emotional bond I see in mums and daughters (my experience and that of friends) feels harder to imagine with a son, and in the people I know there’s less closeness with a son.
4. i’m not into sports, mud, fixing things — all the stereotypical “boy” activities leave me cold.
5. as an adult, it seems many sons just do what their wife wants and don’t stay as close to their own mother — whereas daughters often remain emotionally close and involved.

I know this all sounds very negative and maybe a bit naïve — that’s why I’m posting here. If you have boys, have you found unexpected joys? Is the relationship different than you imagined? Did anyone else feel like this at first but it changed?

I’d really appreciate any honest thoughts or experiences — good or bad — that can help me see a fuller picture.

Thank you.

im in the same boat, except I already have a girl (3) and can’t imagine myself as a boy mum for the very similar reasons, so following.

My Son just turned 4 and i'm currently Pregnant with my second Son, I've loved being a boy Mum! He's so loving, you get all the cuddles and snuggles and kisses! We are thrilled with another Boy! We didnt even experience terrible two's really (2nd son will probably humble me!) He's so well behaved, yes we have hit 4 and Nursery and they play a part, he comes home filthy after hes been looking for bugs or digging for treasure, but Vanish is my new friend! But he also picks me a flower when we walk home from Nursery (Dandelions & Daisies we dont pick peoples flowers!) and comes home with hundreds of pictures hes made for us, every Friday he wants a movie night in mummy & daddy's bed with Snacks and it's our favourite evening. He's just Brilliant. Every child runs the risk of misbehaving or not listening or having tantrums, it's not just a Boy thing, my son is better behaved than his 3 female cousins (They're all under 5) x

If you'd asked me before I had my baby I'd have said I would mildly prefer a girl. I have a boy and he's the best. He's such a funny little sweetheart. I don't think it's really about girls or boys, you just love the baby that you have. I wouldn't want him to be a girl because he wouldn't be himself. He's perfect. If I had another I would want another boy because I would want them to be exactly the same as him!

Boys are so loving and caring and cuddly. My little boy is like a little best friend. And he makes me feel like im his world. Boys are lovely!!!! I’m pregnant with a girl this time so can’t compare yet!

My boy is the cutest, most loveable little thing ever.

I think with girls, because you were one yourself, you have an idea in your head about what to expect (rightly or wrongly).

Once he's here, you will never be able to imagine it any other way.

They’re individuals so it really depends. My husband stays in touch with his mum more than I do with mine. There are plenty of men who are close to their family.

I have two boys and both are so kind and affectionate. When your son is here I imagine you’ll see how wonderful they can be.

Also don’t you see downsides to girls? Every time I see a young woman with altered lips I think thankfully my sons don’t have pressure to do things like that.