Hi all,
Just writing on here as I have nowhere else to turn. My husband and I have been together for twenty years, married for ten, we are 34 and 35 and have two beautiful boys. We are financially stable.
We recently found out we were pregnant unexpectedly. I have not been on contraception for 6 almost 7 years since our youngest son was born and we have used a mix of fertility apps to track ovulation and condoms around ovulation time. I have asked him numerous times over the past half a year to have a vasectomy to which he said he was too scared.
I am 7 weeks pregnant, the doc says I must’ve mistook implantation bleeding for a period and therefore found out later than usual. I initially was over the moon, I love being a mum, I give my everything to being the best mum I could ever be. My oldest son is autistic and has ADHD, so although challenging at times, I have studied a degree in SEND & Inclusion and equipped myself with the knowledge to support his needs. I cope fine, however my husband finds him more challenging and is often stressed.
He says we couldn’t cope with another baby, and that if I have the baby he will not support me and will leave. He says I should put our two sons first especially our son with additional needs as he needs our full support.
I guess what I’m trying to say is I want this baby, however doing it alone does scare me, how would I cope alone with two children and a baby, especially one with additional needs. I am so confused, and so sad about it all. This is supposed to be a magical time, and it couldn’t feel further from it. I also worry about people judging me for having another baby when our eldest does present challenges. Irrelevant really when I cope fine, I would have another just like him as he brings me so much joy and light! My younger son has a beautiful soul, I know he would be an amazing big brother. I am feeling so lost. Sorry for the long message :(