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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Original poster

38 weeks and c section has been highly recommended

47 replies

Millennial92 · 06/04/2025 13:52

Hi, I posted here when I was very early into my pregnancy about having a planned c section. I had a 3rd degree tear with my first, an episitomy, forceps delivery and bad bleeding. Recovery was horrendous for me, took a year of physio and intimacy took maybe longer. All is well now but I went into triage this morning as I have some problems down below and felt baby wasn't moving much (all okay) but I have an ulcer and some tearing down there which I'm being referred to a specialist for. The lady was a gynaecologist who said she was really recommend a c section as she now deals with these ladies who tore more than once during vaginal birth and also considering my skin isnt in great shape down there... I need to make a decision very soon and need to hear others experiences. My main concerns over c section is the pain after, I'll admit the scarring and overhang is really a concern too. Then I have a two year old along with a newborn. Obviously with vaginal birth I'm scared of another tear, forceps and it leading to problems in the future.

Thanks for any advice.

OP posts:
Original poster
Millennial92 · 06/04/2025 13:55

Also and edit, I have been in consultant care until I finally decided on a vaginal birth at 32 weeks which he supported but as they always say "it's up to you" so I had my heart on another vaginal birth until now. Not that it's the end of the world to have a c section.

OP posts:
Acc0untant · 06/04/2025 14:03

I'm a big believer in (almost) always agreeing with medical advice. Occasionally feel a second opinion is warranted and this might be something you want to seek in this instance but if a professional is telling you it's highly recommended I'd be inclined to go with their recommendation.

ForUmberFinch · 06/04/2025 14:13

My section recovery was relatively easy. Paracetamol was all that was needed for slight pain. My scar is barely visible. I used “spritz for bitz” on a pad held on my scar. Worked wonders for healing. I had no option on a section. They refused induction (too busy apparently) and our first was stillborn so I wasn’t allowed to go past 38 weeks. Absolutely no regrets. Sounds like your care team are spot on, I’d be following their advice.

Original poster
Millennial92 · 06/04/2025 14:39

@ForUmberFinch That's reasurring. I have some spritz for bitz in my hospital bag. I've also been reading about silicone patches. Do you have an overhang? It's all superficial I know all I really want is for myself and babs to be healthy really!

OP posts:
Original poster
Millennial92 · 06/04/2025 14:41

@Acc0untant yes I do usually follow medical advice but it's still being left down to me at the end of the day! I'd almost rather they just said "this is what needs to happen!"

OP posts:
LilacPony · 06/04/2025 14:43

If I was with a professional who gave such advice I think I would certainly take it. Honestly a C-section over hang is going to be easier to deal with than another year of physio again

Drivingmissrangey · 06/04/2025 14:44

No problems with recovery from either of mine. The scar is barely visible (and below pant line anyway) and I don’t have an overhang. Can see a slight indentation through underwear but no overhang.

LilacPony · 06/04/2025 14:44

Millennial92 · 06/04/2025 14:41

@Acc0untant yes I do usually follow medical advice but it's still being left down to me at the end of the day! I'd almost rather they just said "this is what needs to happen!"

I’ve felt the same. But they can’t tell you what to do. They can only advise and guide, which they did.

AluckyEllie · 06/04/2025 14:45

I found the ‘it’s up to you’ annoying as well but I think it must be because they get so many complaints and stories of women saying they were forced or pressured into a birth they didn’t want. I’d trust their experience and go for a section if they are leaning towards that. I’ve had two and I can’t comment on overhang as I am overweight which will make that worse. My scar is barely visible and the pain was really well controlled. I had a two year old as well for the second and pain didn’t hold me back.

Bumbers · 06/04/2025 14:48

I have had 2 c sections and honestly they were such good experiences. If you look up other threads on this, you will see a lot of others with similar experiences. a planned c section is generally lovely and calm. You get to start parenting a new baby, without being exhausted. Yes, it is major surgery and you need to be careful- the hardest thing for me was not picking up my (large!) 2 year old.

Wishing you all the best.

BunfightBetty · 06/04/2025 14:51

If the consultant is saying that, I would be listening very, very carefully.

Any scar you may have from c section will be very low down and not visible even in the smallest of bikini bottoms. Lots of people don’t have an overhang (I don’t) and even if you got one, wouldn’t that be better to live with than incontinence or bad scarring of the perineum?

It can be hard to mentally switch track once you have your heart set on something, but once you get your head around the change of plan it will likely feel fine.

Kosenrufugirl · 06/04/2025 14:51

Hi there, it's a labour ward midwife. It is really up to you.

Where I work any woman with a previous 3rd degree tear will get a really experienced midwife for her next delivery. Experience really does matter.

If you go for the vaginal delivery and choose epidural (you don't have to), don't go heavy on the epidural button, especially towards the end. Epidural is meant to take the pain away but keep the sensation of pressure. Sensesation of pressure helps women push. Keeping epidural light helps to avoid instrumental delivery which is a significant risk factor for the 3rd degree tear.

You must also do you pelvic floor exercises for the rest of your life, like all women who gave birth, either vaginally or Caesarean

I hope it helps

DamnitCarol · 06/04/2025 16:28

Your first birth sounds exactly like mine and I chose an elective c section for my second. My consultant gave me all the options and % risks and let me make up my own mind, but when I said I wanted a c section he said “for what it’s worth, I think you have made the right decision”.

Recovery was a walk in the park compared to the 3rd degree tear! I had diclofenac for a week (strong ibuprofen) but other than that I managed absolutely fine. Was back driving by 3 weeks safely. Just have to be careful about lifting your toddler and the car seat for a couple of months.

I am a few pounds overweight, about a size 14 and do have a little pooch over the scar, but I had that anyway beforehand. The scar is so neat you would need to have it pointed out to you to see it.

BC2603 · 06/04/2025 20:56

I was so against a section as I was scared of the recovery but ended up with a category 2 emergency section. The recovery was a walk in the park compared to the labour! I was back horse riding (gently!) after 7 weeks. I have a bit of an overhang but I’m still losing the weight I put on and it’s ever decreasing. It was painful afterwards but I was only on strong meds for about 3 days, then only ibuprofen for a week, then paracetamol just before I got up in the morning (I stiffened in bed)

I really wish I hadn’t been so against it as it really wasn’t that bad

BabyFever246 · 06/04/2025 21:01

I had a c section (EMCS). By day 5 I was walking to my midwife appointments with baby in the pram. It's major surgery, everyone handles recovery differently, but a good c section recovery will be 1000000% easier than recovering from another tear etc from a bad vaginal delivery. Any c section recovery is worse than an easy vaginal delivery of course, but with your history the chances of a bad vaginal delivery are very high, so taking the gamble on how a c section recovery will work out is probably more favourable.

Chiaseedz · 06/04/2025 21:25

Look up c section scar massage, can make a huge difference to the appearance
Sounds like alternative is risk of constant leaking etc which would be much worse!

Giulia8 · 06/04/2025 23:06

My scar is practically invisible from my Category 2 EMCS and no overhang - I didn’t do anything special to it. Nothing.

Also, TMI perhaps but I have/most quickly returned to the best sex life out of all my mum friends who had vaginal births. Lots of tears and episiotomies.

I’d go for the elective personally. I know all too well how straightforward pregnancies and even births can quickly turn into emergency CSes so I’d go for the calmer, planned one with a better recovery. Good luck.

Giulia8 · 06/04/2025 23:08

ForUmberFinch · 06/04/2025 14:13

My section recovery was relatively easy. Paracetamol was all that was needed for slight pain. My scar is barely visible. I used “spritz for bitz” on a pad held on my scar. Worked wonders for healing. I had no option on a section. They refused induction (too busy apparently) and our first was stillborn so I wasn’t allowed to go past 38 weeks. Absolutely no regrets. Sounds like your care team are spot on, I’d be following their advice.

Edited

I’m so sorry to hear about your loss.

Bunnybear42 · 07/04/2025 00:30

ive had 2 planned sections one age 25 and one at 40.
both were relatively easy and recovery fairly quick. It was painful for first few days but I’m sure it was not to the extent of your experience with your first vaginal birth from the sounds of it!

you will need help for a few days particularly as you have a toddler but otherwise hopefully it will be an easier recovery than your first birth.
i have a barely noticeable scar and no overhang at all. Good luck with your decision and I hope you have a smooth birth x

Kosenrufugirl · 07/04/2025 05:27

Labour ward midwife.

I can see most people so far have spoken in favour of a Caesarean section.

Caesarean section is a major abdominal surgery with in inherent risk of bleeding, infection and blood clots. Should you decide to have another child in the future, Caesarean could affect future pregnancies too.

Only you can balance this against the risk of another big tear. Can you make another appointment to see a Consultant/SeniorRegistrar? You would need to see one to book a Caesarean anyway

Original poster
Millennial92 · 07/04/2025 07:51

@Kosenrufugirl thanks for the reply. What about the ulcer and skin tears I already have? I can hardly go for a number 2 at the moment and while I would have an epidural, would I not be causing more damage?

I appreciate a vaginal birth is supposed to be better recovery but it just wasn't for me I was crying for months just getting up and even now it's brushed off as being psychological. I am honestly still edging towards a vaginal birth because midwives recommended it and I know you see alot. I have been so positive in thinking I will labour mostly at home and do everything differently had have a more senior mid wife, I've been doing massages to stretch the skin, researching alot when the baby's head is coming out so I was really all for it but I'm just not sure now. I think I'd be in a bad way if I was to tear again. I'm rambling, I didn't sleep last night thinking about it! Already induction has been mentioned which I always said if I was induced again I'd request a section because it was so horrible.

OP posts:
doodleschnoodle · 07/04/2025 07:55

After your experience the first time, I would have been hammering down their door asking for a c section the second time! I’ve had two and have no long-lasting effects other than the scar and a small overhang which is more to do with weight gain and loss subsequently, plus isn’t visible in clothes. With a gynaecologist recommending it, I would listen to them. It’s you who will be left with the consequences of your decision ultimately though, so you need to maybe do some more reading and speak to a consultant.

SquidgibleDirigible · 07/04/2025 08:00

2 c sections here, 1 EMCS 1 planned. Both fine, recovery was straightforward. I do have a visible.scar but its so low you can't see it unless I'm naked. No overhang. My DS1 was 19 months when DS2 was born and I did really need DH to help during his pat leave then my MIL came to stay for a week when DH went back to work. But it was all fine. Absolutely no regrets.

MissScarletInTheBallroom · 07/04/2025 08:01

I have had an emergency C-section which I hated and a VBAC which I loved.

In your situation I would definitely take the section.

My scar is very small and neat and although the skin is a little puckered, I don't have an overhang. If I lost a few kgs and did some ab exercises I reckon it would be totally flat, but I'm too lazy.

Craftysue · 07/04/2025 08:13

I had a 3rd degree tear with my first baby and required further surgery after 6 months as I was stitched up so badly. I also had a PPH and needed blood transfusions. I waited 5 years to have my second but I wasn't offered a c- section. My second baby was delivered by an excellent experienced midwife and I didn't even have a tear.
I know I was lucky but a vaginal birth can work out well as well - though it sounds like your consultant is recommending a c section. I wish you luck whatever you decide