Breastfeeding baby no. 2 if you couldn’t BF baby no. 1

[K2012]

Hi I need some advice.

I wasn’t able to breastfeed my son as i didn’t really produce any milk, only about 10-20ml a day. I tried everything expressing every 3 hours, bought 2 different breast pumps a manual and electric, went to see the BF team at the hospital etc. and nothing worked so after a few months I gave up. I’m due in a few weeks and wanted to ask for experience/opinions if someone was able to BF their second baby if they couldn’t BF their first?

I will buy ready made bottles to take in to hospital as I’m worried the same thing will happen again.

Thank you in advance.

Hi, of course you can try again and things might be very different this time.

I suggest you start by expressing colostrum before the baby is born. This may well kick-start a good breastfeeding experience.

www.kch.nhs.uk/wp-content/uploads/2023/01/pl-969.1-antenatal-colostrum-harvesting.pdf

I was similar to you OP. With my first I really didn’t get on well with bf, my nipples we’re ruined, he was never satisfied, I tried and tried but stopped after a few months and I always had to top him up with a bottle (of formula). However, I approached baby 2 with an open mind and thought “I may as well try” and it was a totally different experience. He latched easily, was full and happy and breastfeeding was a breeze. We continued till he was almost 4! So, from my experience, it’s very different with each baby. Go for it - try and if it doesn’t work, you know your baby will be absolutely fine with bottles. All the best!

I think your breastfeeding journey with second baby is a lot different to your first. I only managed to combi feed with my first as I felt like I had no milk, I couldn’t express and had no confidence that I was able to do it. With my second I was determined to try and the odds were against us at the start as he was jaundice and needed phototherapy for 2 days so we didn’t establish feeding properly until day 5. But I managed to exclusively feed him for 10 months. I’m not someone whose breasts get engorged, I don’t leak milk and I can’t express more than 10-20mls, but I had plenty of milk to feed babies. I would say go into it with confidence and give it your best shot and there’s every chance you will be able to. You can’t always measure your supply on expressing and if you are managing to feed baby and they are settled, having plenty of wet and dirty nappies and are gaining weight then you are doing fine. But if you don’t manage, find it too stressful, or whatever the reason, it is absolutely fine to not breastfeed too. A fed baby is a happy baby.

Yes you can of course certainly try. Were you ever given a reason for not producing enough, such as breast hypoplasia/insufficient glandular tissue? I have this so no matter what I do to try and up supply it will just never happen because there physically isn't enough breast tissue to supply the milk. Knowing this actually helped me make peace with it and I had a beautiful experience combination feeding, albeit a huge commitment to do both breast and bottle for every single feed.
You may not have this at all but it's worth finding out so at least then you'd know.
If no anatomical issues like this, then you might be surprised and have a totally different experience this time round with a full supply. It can be different for each birth/baby. You won't know until you try but best of luck either way.

Just so you know, expressing isn’t always a true measure of supply.

I recommend getting a copy of
Breastfeeding and the Fourth Trimester by Lucy Webber. It was a lifesaver for me in those early weeks.

Understanding how breastfeeding works, and getting ALL the support available saved my journey. Private tongue tie assessment and cut literally changed feeding from painful to painless overnight. I literally continually bugged people until they helped me.

Baby fussing on the breast isn't necessarily a sign they aren't full, they are doing exactly what they need to do to increase your supply.
My little one was on my boob literally 8 hours at a time some days those first few weeks, and then whenever baby was needing to up supply feeding went mad again.

I also agree with PP about expressing not being a measure of supply. I could never express more than 2-3ml of milk (literally drops!) with my hospital grade pump, yet I definitely have plenty of milk.

I also read that if any of those around you suggest it is okay to bottle feed the probability of stopping breastfeeding was significantly higher. I was determined to breastfeed so I told everyone to never tell me bottle feeding was okay (not that I think it is bad, but I just wanted to minimise the chance of me giving up especially during those early weeks). I had so much support both from family, my partner and I reached out to NHS, private, NCT baby latte group, etc. I went on a breastfeeding course before the baby was born.

The first few weeks were very hard, but they were worth it for the ongoing benefits, both baby and maternal health, as well as practically.

We are now 18 months and still feeding. Baby went to nursery at 8 months 4 days a week and it didn't affect our journey at all.

Yes! Couldn't breastfeed my first - it was extremely painful, and I never had enough milk.

It was so different with my second! It wasn't painful (mostly just uncomfortable), and I had enough milk for him to be exclusively on breastmilk.

I was also way more relaxed about it, which probably helped a lot.

I couldn’t with my first, traumatic birth that ended in emcs so found it difficult with the pain of the c section scar and also had a lot of outside influence (mil) I was too easily influenced.

I'm hoping to pump this time, going to try breast too, but I'm having a planned c section and have been advised against harvesting colostrum.

I’ve tried to research as much as possible, but unsure what to do if I don’t produce enough milk? Do I top up with formula? I’m not leaking at 37 weeks… Will they help in hospital?

i think to be honest do what’s best for you and baby, don’t let anyone influence your choice and I’ve read supplements and keeping hydrated really helps!

I was the other way round. Breastfeeding my first was pretty straight forward, never painful; ebf till 12months. My second was sooo hard, always hungry, never enough milk. Then you get into a cycle of giving more formula, we stopped around 3months.

Every baby/birth is different, just see how it goes.

Do you know why didn’t produce enough milk? I didn’t with my first, in part to my health (EMCS and spesis) but I manged
to feed my second. Second time wasn’t plain saling but I had enough supply. I know a qualified lacation consultant and it took her 2 weeks before her and baby could get a good latch. I think instant perfect breast feeding is very, very rare.

Thank you everyone for the replies. I will definitely give it a try this time.

I don’t know why I wasn’t producing milk. I went to see the BF team at the hospital who tried to help but even then I couldn’t BF and stopped a while after.