Anxious about my bump size 🫣

[MsLaidBack]

Hey all just a little vent 😵‍💫

So I'm a plus size mama (UK 18), 30w3d. I've been having regular consultant check ups every 4 weeks since I was 20 weeks with no concerns (BP or gestational diabetes). At my last midwife appointment my measurements were within range.

So today I saw someone I know who is a retired neonatal nurse and they were concerned about how small I'm carrying for how far along I am..... Now I'm all in my head and feeling anxious 🫣. I'm feeling regular movement so wasn't concerned but now I am 😞

Ok yes I can still wear a lot of my pre pregnancy clothes but they're high waisted with a lot of stretch lol and no they're not that comfortable. I was seen in my work tunic which is a size 26 anyway! I like baggy clothes at work for comfort so maybe that's why she thought I looked small 🤷🏽‍♀️ I don't feel small at all lol

Depends on how you're carrying. Some mums are all bump, others you can't even tell they're pregnant. Your consultant and midwife are happy with you, so don't give it a second thought!

I'm behind you (25+4) and size 16 and can still fit into most of my pre-pregnancy clothes. Jeans being the exception! You literally can't tell I'm pregnant.

Obviously isn't medical advice but just in case it helps you feel less alone. 😊 Also bumps tend to be smaller if it's your first, I think?

If your midwive says you are measuring ok, then you are.
There are lots of bump shapes, which make them look bigger or smaller. The only telling thing is the cm measured and the scans.

Thank you I'll try not too plus I have an appointment including a scan in 2 weeks x

People love giving unsolicited comments about bump sizes. The only way to measure is by scan or tape measure if appropriate. Being an ex neonatal nurses gives her zero qualification to comment

Thank you. You're right if they're not concerned I shouldn't be either

Ignore anyone other than your actual health care team on this. I had a doctor (at work not a doctor who was treating me) ask if I was sure my baby was developing properly because my bump was so small. The week before I gave birth I had someone refuse to believe I was pregnant. I wore pre pregnancy tops all through my pregnancy. DS was born on the 50th centile and healthy.

Honestly, I wouldn't give the casual passing remark a second thought - your baby is measuring fine, no-one who has actually examined you is concerned, no-one who has scanned you is concerned.

As a pp said, you tend to show later and have a smaller bump with your first. We are a similar size and it wasn't till about 32/33 weeks when I think I popped and looked unmistakably pregnant with my first. Before that, I just looked like I'd eaten too much and put on a bit of weight.

I actually had a non pregnancy related MRI at 29ish weeks and I remember the person scanning me just couldn't believe I was in the third trimester as what little bump I had completely disappeared when I lay flat!

Second pregnancy, totally different story.

Your retired neonatal nurse 'friend' should know better. Every woman and every pregnancy is different.

You're fine.

I was small and all my babies were SGA. Here's a bump pic the day before I went to hospital to be induced.

Glad I'm not alone lol. This is my second pregnancy but first to carry so far

Trying to upload pic again...

I got some comments about my small bump in my first pregnancy. I did eventually start measuring small for dates though, and was sent for extra scans, and was induced at 39 weeks as they thought the umbilical cord wasn't working properly anymore.

I had several growth scans as my bump was measuring small but all fine and baby came out at a healthy 6lb13oz. My bump at 40 weeks was a lot smaller than my friends at 30 weeks. Her baby wasn’t much bigger than mine. We all carry differently so as long as consultant is happy ignore anyone else.

Please don't worry, the opinions of your midwife and consultant are all that matters. If they are happy with the size of your bump and baby's growth, based on actual medical tests and measurements then that should hold far more weight than the unsolicited opinion of some acquaintance in the street who knows nothing about your medical history, regardless of what prior job she may have done.
I understand your worry, however. I was slim before I got pregnant, a UK size 8, and I didn't gain a single pound during my first trimester, despite eating well. I didn't start to show at all until I was about 32 weeks along and, even then, I only had a tiny bump, hardly visible, throughout the rest of my pregnancy and could fit into all my pre-pregnancy clothes, though as I live in dresses this was easier. Like you, I had regular check-ups during pregnancy and was told that all was fine and baby was growing well. However, I too got comments from well-meaning people telling me that they were huge by the time they were as far along as me, which made me paranoid. However, thank god, I gave birth to a beautiful and healthy seven pound baby girl. All the best for the rest of your pregnancy.

I'd take the word of the midwife over the neonatal nurse. She's on the wrong side of the womb!

Bump size doesn't just depend on if you're slim or chunky to begin with, it also depends on whether you have a long or short body, wide hips, etc etc. Also if you suffer from water retention or not.

Basically, every mum's bump is totally different, I wouldn't worry!

No offence meant to her but a neonatal nurse is not an expert on bump size. And I'd argue that no one actually is?? Size of bump means very little. As a midwife I can't gauge how big a baby will be by simply having a quick look at a bump so unless she has xray vision I don't see how she can either😂 Unsolicited comments like this can cause so much concern. Rest in the knowledge that you're attending antenatal care, having all the relevant checks done, and your own team have no concerns. Your bump is lovely. Enjoy the rest of your pregnancy x

I had this with my fourth, had previous big babies including an 11lber (yikes I know). So many ppl commenting on how small I was carrying for my 4th baby that it really worried me towards the end. I would NEVER comment on the size of someone's bump for that reason. Turns out baby was perfectly sized and a good healthy 8lb 10. Albeit my smallest lol.

Hi there, I would really try not to worry and just listen to your midwives. Not being rude but surely a neonatal nurse has had a lot less experience with pregnant women than a midwife? They deal with the afterwards not the during. They'll have measured your baby during your scans too and would have said something if anything was up.
Everyone carries differently and you'll find your bump will change on a day to day bases by how the baby is positioned. Also it'll look smaller/bigger by the clothes you're wearing too. My bump looked massive in flowy dresses but smaller in jeans. No one can really make a comment by just looking! Please don't worry and if you are just give your residential midwife a ring I'm sure they'd ease your mind 🙂

My bump measured off the scale too small at all my appointments and I had scans after everyone showing a baby above 50th percentile. Baby was born at just on 50th percentile! They all just said I was carrying well with some good stomach muscles!!

Thank you all for your responses. You have all made me feel a lot better 😊❤️

My bumps managed to look small, measure as slightly small to average, and still grow 90th centile or bigger babies – how a bump look counts for very little.

I had people telling me how big my bump was but my fundal height was always on the 10th percentile and baby was 6lb13!

It's so easy to worry I was the same used to constantly worry my bump wasn't big enough/getting any bigger. I'm tall so think she just had more room to stretch out 😅 I never had a huge bump but was always smack bang middle of percentile chart everytime I got measured and had a healthy 7lbs 14oz baby girl at full term 😊
Edit- please do enjoy this end stretch though and try not to worry! Thinking back now I loved being pregnant it gave me such body confidence in the end.

My bump looks completely different depending on what I'm wearing. I'm 28+4 and not much smaller than you. Ignore your "friend". Everyone is different and so long as the professionals are happy, only their word should matter.