6 weeks pregnant and struggling

[flamebobo]

TW talk of emetophobia & stillbirth

Hi everyone, im currently 6 weeks pregnant with my 3rd baby and im really struggling with anxiety and worry as well as feeling quite rubbish in myself.

I've struggled in both my previous pregnancies in the first trimester with severe tiredness, nausea and just generally feeling unwell. However I suffer with emetophobia (fear of vomit) and for some reason this pregnancy I am worrying significantly more about being sick. This is impacting my mood and I'm always finding myself in states of panic whenever I get a wave of nausea, I've never been sick in any of my pregnancies and I'm really hoping this one is the same!

Both my previous pregnancies haven't been smooth running either, my first baby was unfortunately stillborn at 36 weeks and my 2nd was born at 34 weeks and needed to be in neonatal unit for 3 weeks. So obviously this impacts my anxiety and causes me a lot of extra worry too.

I really want to enjoy this pregnancy as I don't plan on having anymore but my brain is just in overdrive and I'm struggling to relax and even concentrate on a day to day basis. If it wasn't for my little girl I probably wouldn't even get out of bed I'd just try and sleep as much as possible so I can get out of this first trimester.

I don't really know what the aim of this post is, I guess I'm just seeking if anyone has any advice on how to relax more and deal with first trimester symptoms. I want to be more positive and not expect the worst to happen.

I really feel for you. It's not easy. I'm in a bit of a similar situation. I'm 7 weeks, previous 2 pregnancies were miscarriages, the 2 before that are now healthy children. It's total limbo and I agree with the anxiety.

I'm not sure what advice I can offer other than get to youtube and learn some breathing techniques for when your anxiety starts to kick in. I sometimes light an incense stick and do some guided mediation from youtube which not only helps pass the time but it does relax you for a bit. Also, maybe your midwife can offer some advice if you tell her your struggling.

Best of luck to you.

I don't have a fear of vomiting but I can relate to the anxiety and the not relaxing part of what you've written.
After years of infertility and following IVF our first baby was a tfmr at 26 weeks and our second was a high risk pregnancy for completely unrelated reasons to the first. I've been sick in all 3 pregnancies but this time has been the worst and I was diagnosed with hyperemesis. I now have the vomiting under control with medication and although the nausea is still there, it's made a massive difference.
Contact pregnancy sickness support, they'll be able to give you advice on medication for nausea and support in discussing with your GP. I found them so helpful.
This pregnancy was a surprise to us and I've really wanted to enjoy our miracle but feeling so ill all the time and then anxiety on top has been tough. I feel so guilty for my toddler and my husband. We have much more support in our second trimester. In our first trimester I went for fortnightly scans to help me feel connected and give me a little bit of reassurance that the baby was there and growing.
Like you this will likely be my last pregnancy and tbh part of me has now accepted I don't like pregnancy, it's not good for me either physically or mentally. But my toddler was worth all of it and this baby will be too. So I've decided it's ok not to enjoy this bit and to focus on what I need each day to manage. It's not always easy though.