Feeling low and overwhelmed - just me?

[OptimisticRealist2024]

I'm 21 weeks and feeling a little bit emotionally/mentally done in now. I know I'm only halfway through, and people keep telling me "this is the good bit" but I just feel like I can't enjoy pregnancy. Am I the only one? I feel so guilty. ☹️

I'm having a bit of a week of it anyway, but I just don't feel like I'm having any good days at the moment. Just a lot of trying to get through the day without triggering my anxiety because I know it's bad for the baby.

I've tried talking to my midwife but she's on leave (again), and the backup when she's away is the emergency maternity assessment unit. This isn't really an emergency, I think I'm just really fed up of being on high alert (and fed up
of being fed up). My midwife is never around and promised me a referral to some anxiety counselling 6 weeks ago. I chased her by email last week and she hadn't remembered to fill in the form. She thinks the waiting list might be around 6 months 🙄

To cap it all, I tripped over last night and landed on my belly (all checked out and baby fine), but it just feels like another bloody thing that I need to stress about, and now my knees are wrecked so I can't walk off the stress. ☹️

I am very lucky to be pregnant and have lots of wonderful people to support me but I still feel crap, really. I've just been sobbing a lot today about how fed up I am. I just wondered if this is hormones or just me or if anyone else has been through similar (and seen light at the end of the tunnel)? How do you get through this without becoming a puddle?

Can you self refer to your Trust's perinatal mental health team? Or ask to speak to them to discuss referral priorities and criteria?

@OptimisticRealist2024 Not sure I really have any good advice but read your post and my heart goes out to you. My children are late teens so quite hard to remember how I felt when pregnant but I think feeling anxious is quite normal and then add pregnancy hormones to the mix and it can all feel a bit much sometimes. Are you normally an anxious person? I wasn’t anxious particularly in my twenties or thirties but I am now so I do know how overwhelming it can be. Doesn’t help when people (probably unwittingly) make you feel worse about it as your not particularly enjoying your pregnancy so far but then I know a lot of people that didn’t enjoy their pregnancy so that’s quite normal too. We are all different aren’t we. You say you have a good support network so that’s positive, take time out for you and talk to the people most closest to you about how you feel. Practice mindfulness if you can and watch your favourite comedy programmes, keep your mind busy on doing a puzzle or a crossword. And remember you have nothing to feel guilty about, you can’t help
how you feel - just need to try and train your brain to relax a bit and bring some positivity- easier said than done I know! Are they any particular concerns you have about being a mum (I presume you are a first time mum) that you can talk out loud about, maybe that will help?

Why would you feel guilty? If it’s hard going, it’s hard going.

Did somebody promise you that being pregnant would be like skipping through a field of daisies? It’s not. No doubt some people find it easier and some people find it harder, but everyone finds bits of it hard.

What are you on high alert for? What are you afraid of?