Small bump and peoples comments

[NMc16]

Getting tired of people looking at my bump and saying ‘oh you’re very small. Is the baby moving ok?’ ‘Are you eating enough?’ ‘Are you putting on weight?’ ‘You don’t look pregnant’. Whether this is meant with good intentions or not the comments are frustrating. I’ve been seen by my midwife. My bloods are fine, my blood pressure is fine and the baby is fine. In fact they are weighing what they should be and no complications. I wish people would just mind their own business. I had lost weight in the first trimester due to nausea and food aversion and I’ve gained like half a stone since. Trust me I feel pregnant and eating non stop. Just wish I could curl away and ignore the world

you will probably find it’s sour grapes, I would have loved a nice little bump, mine were huge 😂

just smile and say “ I love my bump, absolutely perfect “

I smiled back at one of them and said ‘everything is perfect’ they looked like they didn’t believe me.

Just ignore them. People can be very odd. Towards the end of my pregnancy I had random people insisting it must be twins because I was so big, didn’t seem to realise how rude that was at all. My son was actually average sized but I’m quite a small woman which I think made my bump look bigger than it was.

People comment if you're big too just part of it. I always got the opposite of your huge why are you so big , just smile and move on

Nobody could tell I was pregnant until the last month. He was 8lb and super healthy. Just keep repeating what you said. A slightly sharp tone should get your message across.

Oh mama I can so much feel you😫was pregnant with twins and till about 20w I looked so tiny. People always commenting how small I am and if I’m sure I’m having twins?!?😂 duh at 27w I looked bigger and than a full term pregnancy. But oh lord I so much hated those comments!

Give them a little lecture.

Well thank for that comment, everything is fine with my pregnancy but just a heads up that you might want to refrain from commenting on people's pregnancies in future. I'm sure you wouldn't want to be intrusive, imagine how someone might feel if they were struggling and then you come along and point out how small they are. It might upset them.

Or something like that.

I've been quite literally told I look really big and really small on the same day.

People are weird. Ignore.

So what if they don’t believe you? What difference does it make? My mil used to make similar comments, I just shrugged it off and ignored her, I knew all was fine at appointments etc so what does it matter what random people with no insight or medical opinion say?

Tbh I’ve gained major health anxiety during this pregnancy and peoples comments really aren’t helping. I also am quite slim so they do not take into account that that’s maybe why I’m small? Very frustrating

Either accept that their comments are well-intentioned chit-chat, or ignore them.

I found a photo the other day of me at 8 months pregnant with my first, sitting on a sofa wearing a baggy cardigan. I did not look pregnant in the pic, and had a small bump in reality, but popped out a big baby three weeks later. I got a lot of 'gosh, you ARE carrying small...' comments, but none of them felt mean.

I had the same with my first. Someone even asked me if the baby was ok. I was 6 months pregnant before you could even see. I had an 8 pound baby! It did upset me mine...

It's so bizarre how people assume they can comment on your body or what you are eating the second they know you're pregnant.

Its so bizarre to me when people do this, it's just unnecessary to comment on anyone's body, ever. The only people who should be interested in your bump are you and your Midwife. I had this for my entire pregnancy and I am a hospital midwife so most people commenting were actually Midwives/doctors etc who should know better imo. Even though I also knew better, the comments still worried me to no end, so I know exactly how I feel! I would just retort with positivity 'baby is growing perfectly thanks,' 'I feel great I and little one is right on track,' or a bit more direct 'it creates worry for me when people comment on my size, my care team have no concerns about baby's size so I'd be much happier if you didn't comment.'

It is your pregnancy after all and no one should be making you feel this way. If you want some extra reassurance just mention at your next appointment that these kind of comments have been playing on your mind and I'm sure your midwife will reassure you.
Congratulations OP!

How far gone are you OP? My first pregnancy I don't think i looked properly pregnant till i was about 32 weeks!

I’m 29 weeks

I went for a non pregnancy related MRI scan at 29 weeks in my first pregnancy and the scanner had somehow missed that I was pregnant in my notes.
She jumped about 3 feet when she saw a baby in there 🤣
She couldn't believe it when I said I was in the third trimester as I barely had a bump at all and pretty much a flat stomach when I lay down.
It 'popped' about 2 or 3 weeks later but I was never huge.

Second pregnancy now and I'm a lot bigger.

I’ve never commented on someone’s pregnancy bump. I’ve said to my friend who was also quite small her bump is neat which is a nicer way of saying it. I would never turn round and say ‘ you are tiny is there something wrong’ ‘you are massive’. I know it’s probably hormones making me feel extra grouchy about it but it does get very tiresome to listen to the comments on repeat and having to explain ‘yes I’ve saw midwives and I’ve a perfectly healthy baby’. Like do people not get that you actually go and see midwives to get check ups? If there was something wrong you would know about it.

I started showing maybe around 16 weeks but obv wasn’t huge just looked like I was bloated. You can definitely tell I’m pregnant now lol

I always had small bumps and minimal weight gain and felt extremely lucky.

No one should be commenting on pregnant women unless it’s to tell them they look fabulous.

Every woman and every pregnancy is different there isn't a 'one size fits all'. Just ignore them.

Everyone has an opinion on everything when you're pregnant - even my 10 year old niece commented a couple of weeks ago that I had a tiny bump (I'm now 33 weeks) but said yesterday how 'massive' I was now

I doubt anybody is trying to upset you, OP, so try and let it all wash over you if you can. People just make some clunky small talk with pregnant women, IME. The same will happen when baby is born - oooh isn’t he/she tiny, huge, long, whatever.

I’m very tall and quite slim and barely ever looked pregnant with my first two. Had to have lots of growth scans because the bumps were so small, but they were all fine, which was enough reassurance for me.

I suppose it might be better than being told you look like a whale every time you leave home?

People are just trying to make conversation. Try not to be overly sensitive.

I was tiny with my first, didn't show until about 6 months and got accused of lying about being pregnant at 8 months.

Just had my 3rd and everyone commented how huge bump was the whole pregnancy, how many babies were in there etc.

People don't mean anything serious by it and I wouldn't be worried.

I had the same. Both my bumps were identical and both my babies came out healthily and with half an ounce difference each time. It’s clearly just how I carry. I quite like that they obviously grew in similar ways.

What fuelled people’s comments to me was that they knew I was very active during pregnancy, as I am anyway, I didn’t ’slow down’, and I had ENDLESS comments (especially from in-laws) about how I really shouldn’t continue running or hill climbing or lifting weights, how I was clearly putting the baby at risk and being selfish, and that I was vain for not just putting my feet up and ‘eating for two’. Ugh. No.

Because my bumps were small (I’m quite long bodied) I did have a lot of growth scans, and I did have some pretty epic complications along the way. But none of them were caused by my activity, which my doctors wholly supported me in and even advised.

Tell people firmly that you’d rather they didn’t comment on your pregnant body, you’re perfectly healthy.

I had a growth scan last week and all was good. Baby weighing over 2 pounds already. I guess I’m just extra grouchy at the minute. In 5 ft 6 and also quite active. I got asked should I be going to the gym in my condition. I go on the treadmill and the bike. Not as if I’m lifting heavy weights. rolls eyes and just because you are pregnant doesn’t mean your housebound. My job can be active at times also and I’m planning to work up as long as I can.