Baby shower | Mumsnet

NMc16 · 2025-02-07T16:24:30+00:00

My friends had asked my sister about planning a baby shower and I’m always kind of against baby showers tbh so I just said I would rather wait until they are born as in my view it makes more sense. My friends seemed annoyed. I don’t get why they are annoyed surely it’s my decision?

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Iloveeverycat · 07/02/2025 16:39

Yes it is your decision. I don't get baby showers or baby reveals either.

Pinkelephant66 · 07/02/2025 16:40

Iloveeverycat · 07/02/2025 16:39

Yes it is your decision. I don't get baby showers or baby reveals either.

Agreed. It’s basically saying ‘buy me presents’

Original poster

NMc16 · 07/02/2025 16:58

Exactly. I will probably get my baby christened when they are born. No need to have a baby shower or a reveal as well

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Allswellthatendswelll · 07/02/2025 17:19

Completely up to you. I personally think celebrate when baby is here!

DappledThings · 07/02/2025 17:24

Totally your decision. Your way is the traditional way. Not up to anyone else to try and make you take on the baby shower nonsense.

sel2223 · 07/02/2025 19:06

Why on earth would anyone be annoyed, it's completely up to you.

I don't agree with baby showers either and won't be having one. I just can't bring myself to celebrate a baby who isn't here yet, especially since a friend had a stillborn baby a couple of days after her baby shower a few years ago. Just horrific.

I doubt I'll do anything at all as we're not religious, but if I was going to, it'd be a low key 'meet the baby' lunch or coffee or something after baby was born.

Original poster

NMc16 · 08/02/2025 06:19

That’s awful. This is the reason I don’t agree with baby showers. While it’s nice for everyone to get together and I so far have a healthy baby with a low risk pregnancy. I just think it makes more sense to celebrate the baby when they are actually here. I’ve been to baby showers and brought a gift I’m happy to attend. Maybe that makes me sound hypocritical. Is it not nicer to have the actual baby there and pass them around to make a fuss out of them?
i just wouldn’t personally have one myself.

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wingsspan · 08/02/2025 07:45

I have had a few people try to talk me into a baby shower. I think they are tacky and I can't stand the idea of people thinking they need to buy stuff for me/ baby. If people want to buy something then they will anyway and they can bring it when they come to meet the baby.

Original poster

NMc16 · 08/02/2025 09:25

wingsspan · 08/02/2025 07:45

I have had a few people try to talk me into a baby shower. I think they are tacky and I can't stand the idea of people thinking they need to buy stuff for me/ baby. If people want to buy something then they will anyway and they can bring it when they come to meet the baby.

This is exactly my point. People will buy you gifts when they visit the baby although I don’t expect it. People talking you into this probably just want a party for themselves and they should respect your decision.

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KittyFantastica · 08/02/2025 09:47

My mum and MiL couldn't stop talking about a baby shower from the moment I hit 12 weeks. I'd had two early losses and was nervous, so said no, but they went on and on. Instead of a baby shower, they went out and bought loads of stuff.

I went into premature labour at 19 weeks. All the things they bought our son are now locked away, too painful to look at. My due date group also had two other late term losses. Baby showers are a no from me.

Original poster

NMc16 · 08/02/2025 11:05

I’m so sorry to hear that. No one should be forced or pressured into having a baby shower just because it’s some thing they think you should do.

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Original poster

NMc16 · 08/02/2025 11:09

wingsspan · 08/02/2025 07:45

I have had a few people try to talk me into a baby shower. I think they are tacky and I can't stand the idea of people thinking they need to buy stuff for me/ baby. If people want to buy something then they will anyway and they can bring it when they come to meet the baby.

I think they are tacky also. I would feel
mortified at people thinking I was out looking for gifts

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heroinechic · 08/02/2025 11:10

I personally love attending baby showers, they're usually a lovely social occasion. I really didn't want one of my own though (I hate being center of attention).

I met a few friends for lunch at about 36 weeks pregnant with DD only to be surprised with a baby shower with all my family/DH's family and friends. I appreciated them all coming out but it really wasn't something I wanted. I have given strict instructions for no baby showers (surprise or otherwise) this time.

BlondiePortz · 08/02/2025 11:11

I never had one i have no interest in them