Miscarriage, about to return to work post maternity leave - WWYD?

[MixedFeelings72]

About to return to work after a year of maternity leave, using accrued holiday to take me to my return to work date next week. Going back into a new department with a new boss. Had an early positive pregnancy test a few weeks ago, but have had spotting since, and my pink dye tests have shown little progression, so was prepared for a miscarriage. Am bleeding quite heavily since last night, so am assuming the worst. Compassionate leave policy includes time off for miscarriage, but this would involve telling my new boss I was pregnancy and am now miscarrying, and not sure quite how to communicate this! WWYD?

I would let them know and take the time I needed. It can’t be that unusual for women to go back to work from may leave pregnant. Lots of families have a two year age gap and this would be a bit less not not by much so it must be very common.

Do you feel like you need time of to process the miscarriage? If you do then obviously you will need to tell your manager, but if you don't feel like you need the time off i wouldn't as it's basically advertising you plan to go off on mat leave again very soon, which could cause problems (it shouldn't but we all know with some managers/teams it can do)

Agree with @Youcancallmeirrelevant I'd consider not telling your manager - personally I'd get settled back into a role before making any kind of pregnancy related annoucements if at all possible. I completely understand why you might require time off to process, but do you get paid sick leave also? Could you say little one has bought a bug back from nursery and you are both sick. Usually I wouldn't suggest lying to your work BUT if you are entitled to time off to care for yourself following the loss of a pregnancy I don't see how it's different to taking time off for the flu - why do they need to know?

Honestly, I’d start back next week as normal, but I never took time off for miscarriages (except days where I was physically in hospital). I didn’t want anyone to know, or to talk about it. Carrying on as normal was my way of coping.

But everyone is different when it comes to dealing with miscarriages, so this might not be the right answer for you.