2 under 2! BF advice

[GraceyDoodles]

Hello, advice welcome please - we are expecting our second baby! DD will be 2YO when the baby arrives. I'm really hoping to breastfeed (I BF DC1 for 1 year) but struggling to imagine the logistics of a newborn and young toddler. I'm so happy about the pregnancy but anxiety is creeping up on me and I think the hormones are causing me to really overthink and feel overwhelmed. Any kind tips please? X

Ime it will be a lot easier than washing /making formula...
Excuse for cuddles on the sofa. Maybe a bit of Disney and some snacks. Ime it will help your toddler associate you bf the Stealer Of Your Time with reassuring hugs and a bit of TV!!
I have photos of a toddler on my knee and a newborn feeding. Can be managed quite easily!!

Thank you! This is just the positivity I need

I had a 22 month gap. I only remember it being one afternoon where I felt I was stuck feeding the baby and couldn't entertain the toddler. Otherwise it all just slotted together and wasn't any issue. I fed both DC to 14 months.

Thanks for asking this. In the same boat and I've been wondering the same :-)

I’m still breastfeeding my 17 month old so I think I’ll end up tandem feeding at times. Otherwise I’m planning to breastfeed the newborn while playing with the toddler 🤣 maybe that’s naive to think it will be easy but I’m not worrying about it at this point

Once you've cracked it breastfeeding gives you a free hand to sit on the floor and play with the toddler or read books on the sofa, dispense cuddles and so on. Bottle feeding you need to hold both the baby and the bottle so don't have a free hand!

I had 3 in 3 years. A bf blur but loved it. It is absolutely true they aren't little long. Whatever difficult phase you are in it's nearly over and a new one arrives!! Honestly try and enjoy 2 close together.. A bit of practice and you can synchronise naps...

It is hard to imagine, I agree, but it just works.

I have wonderful memories of playing with my then 21 month old DS whilst cradling a newborn feeding.

You adapt to the new family life. And you cut yourself a little slack around tidiness, cleaning, every meal being home cooked fare and children watching things on the TV.

Congratulations on your pregnancy! My DS was a little older when baby arrived but will sit nearby and play / listen to a story / watch a cartoon / stroke his sister's head whilst I breastfeed. Friends recommended new/interesting toys for any stubborn phases.

Today I was bf my 11 month old, crouched down, holding him with my knees, and using both hands to help 3yo use the toilet.

It’s totally manageable, particularly being that you have bf before.

I found the bf relationship a bit different with youngest as there isn’t that time for gazing at your baby, feeding for ages, cuddles on the sofa all afternoon and I did feel guilty for that - however I knew that wasn’t something I should feel guilty about out, just couldn’t help it. It made the night feeds in early days more manageable as it was our only time to bf alone without distractions.

Now that he’s older though, I love it for a bit of connection time throughout the day.

I had a 21 month gap between ds1 and 2. I spent time when pregnant encouraging ds1 to entertain himself in preparation for ds2's arrival. I was really lucky with ds2 as he was a 'speedy feeder' and would literally feed for 20 minutes (I tried to get him to have longer feeds but he would just be sick!). I am afraid the TV was used a bit too much as ds1 was prone to getting into mischief!

20 months between mine and I am BF youngest. I won't lie, it has been hard at times, but I think bottle feeding would've been equally hard. As someone else said, you can breastfeed one handed unlike bottle feeding. I very quickly got used to sitting cross legged on the floor feeding whilst also playing with toddler or reading a book.
My biggest tip: learn to sling feed. I only had to a few times in the stretchy wrap I used under 4 months, as baby would frequently nurse to sleep in normal position then stay sleeping as I put her into the pre tied stretchy wrap I already wore. Was like a piece if clothing I put on when dressing, baby was in it constantly! But once she started waking on being moved, I started feeding in a half buckle which I could shimmy her up sleeping in to standard carrying position for rest of the nap. Absolute lifesaver.

I bf baby and his 2-year-old brother bf teddy.

I had a two year age gap exactly. It worked well for us and I feel like we got into a little rhythm together, as the older one was in nursery for just a few hours, we had many many hours together as a 3. For us, it meant lots of time at home playing and enjoying time together rather than rushing out to baby classes like I'd done with the first. Also, it helped with my son's independence and communication skills. We had a 'now' 'next' board where I would say 'now I will feed the baby and next we can pick any game you like'. I think they like the involvement in that way. We watched lots of tv and I didn't feel guilty for that. I also made a special box which came out during breastfeeding time only, inside were 5 extremely 'special' toys and he knew those were reserved for the times I wasn't able to be totally hands on with him. Lots of praise and rewards. I definitely didn't feel he was too young to understand that I couldn't give him my undivided attention for those times when feeding.

I just had a flashback to when my daughter was newborn and my son was 2 and we went to the park, it got dark and was freezing cold, she needed feeding so I sat on a park bench feeding her in the pitch black cold and I made him run around the bench counting how many times he could go around whilst she fed 🤣🤣

Thank you so much for all the lovely comments. I really needed the boost, so much appreciated