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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Feeling Guilty

2 replies

9425B · 27/12/2024 01:59

I’m 30 weeks pregnant and struggling….my mental health wasn’t great pre-pregnancy and has taken a hit in the last couple weeks especially. Some of the normal pregnancy symptoms/issues I find super triggering and difficult to deal with from past abuse and I think getting closer to birth is freaking me out and making me spiral. I used to cope with flashbacks by keeping physically busy or negatively cope with pills/alcohol/self harm which i obviously don’t want to do now but I don’t know how else to deal with them. I’m scared about the flashbacks and sometimes find it so hard to manage that I end up wishing none of this was happening, wishing that I’d never got pregnant and didn’t have a baby coming. I feel awful that I think that in those moments and guilty that I won’t be bringing my baby into a secure, stable home and that it’s irresponsible. But at the same time I panic about something being wrong with my baby, I have bad dreams about awful things happening, that baby is dead or something is wrong. I didn’t feel baby move for all of an hour one morning and my mind immediately goes to “he’s dead, they’re going to tell me at the scan that he’s dead”. I seem to worry about everything, I’m anxious and paranoid even about non baby related things. Doesn’t help that my relationship with baby’s dad hasn’t been great, at the moment he’s not living with me and won’t be for quite a while. I get very little help or support from him. I know social care will be involved because I’m currently still sometimes living with a not great family member and I guess also because I’ve had bad mental health but it freaks me out that they think I’d hurt my baby or take baby away from me. That I can’t escape my past and it’ll keep coming back. Just want to cry most the time and I don’t know what to do or how to move forward.

OP posts:
cherrybl0ssom5 · 27/12/2024 02:12

hey @9425B have you confided in your midwife about how you’re feeling? she should be able to help out x

Annoymous3659 · 27/12/2024 02:14

I am really sorry to hear everything you are going through. It sounds like a lot. Please don’t deal with it on your own and talk to your midwife. You can ask for a referral to the perinatal mental health team who will support you before and after birth. They are there to support you and foster/ strengthen your relationship with baby rather than take him away. Just know you are not alone and try be kind to yourself as you are already dealing with a lot. Try also lean on any other support networks around you with family and friends x wishing you the best

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