Second Labour Recovery Stories After Tough First!

[Gee2020]

Hi everyone,

I was just wondering if anyone could share their second time labour recovery stories for some reassurance (and for some realistic expectations!)
Had a wonderful, text book pregnancy with my first born DS but a bit of a back story of my labour for relevance:

He came naturally at 37+5 after 34 hours from the first contraction. Started having very very mild period like pains around 8pm which were absolutely fine (and which I slept through) until 3am when they woke me up but they were still fine and I could talk through them. 8am I was checked and I was 1cm and baby was lying LOP so slightly twisted to the side but otherwise fully engaged; 1pm went into the birth unit and was 3cm, labour progressed steadily until 8pm when I hit 6cm and hopped in the bath for some relief; started G&A at 10pm when I was thought to be around 8cm (no checks to confirm), and then around 2am, started to really struggle. Waters still hadn't gone and I was getting tired but managed to push through. At 4am I hopped out of the bath and was checked and I was 10cm and my midwife broke my waters. Contractions ramped up and it took 2 hours of pushing to get him out (which we then found out was because he was in a brow presentation) so, because of this, I had a small episiotomy as by the time he was in the birth canal he was coming out almost face first. Because of this, the last 4 hours, particularly the 2 hours of pushing, were absolutely brutal and I genuinely thought he was going to break my pelvis coming out. I was black and blue from, and across my vagina - (sorry TMI), down to my thighs from the pressure of him coming out in a brow/face presentation and my midwife said it was some of the worst she had seen and that it was one of the toughest deliveries she had seen. I also had a lovely couple of prolapses to deal with (again, likely thanks to his positioning!)

Because of this, and now being pregnant with my second, I am slightly terrified of the recovery. The birth I feel pretty confident about and very much what will be will be, however I have a toddler to look after now too and I was almost totally immobile after my first which I would hate to be this time. It took me a good 2 weeks to comfortably be able to stand up and walk without feeling like, and apologies but for lack of a better explanation, everything was going to fall out.

Has anyone had a similar first birth with a slightly savage recovery and gone onto have a blissful second? Or am I in denial? 😂

Thanks so much for getting this far!

I have only had one baby (very long slow labour but good recovery) but my sister in law had a difficult birth with my first niece, quite a lot of intervention and the baby was traumatized after and wouldn't eat for ages. She read up a lot on hypno birthing after and just birth in general so she understood it all better for the next time, felt empowered to stand up for herself more and had a very chill second birth that went really well. Not saying that it's the same exact situation as lots of what was difficult about hers was that she felt that doctors weren't listening, but the second birth was also much easier on her physically. I've heard from midwives that second births are usually better as your body knows what it's doing more. Good luck and I hope it's a better experience for you this time

@malimoon thank you so much for your reassurance! Great to hear your sister-in-law had a better experience second time round. It’s funny how much more people will listen to you with your second as opposed to being seen as the dramatic first time mum who knows no better. It’s so frustrating!

I feel confident about birth. I think because I managed to get him out in the first place in the position he was in has given me an unusual sense of self confidence that I’ve pushed my body to the extreme once so if I need to do it again, so be it! It’s just that recovery that’s worrying me. I remember going for a shower shortly after birth and it being just awful when I’d heard so many people say it’s the best shower ever. I couldn’t enjoy the famous tea and toast because I couldn’t find a comfortable enough position that soon to be in long enough to eat and every time I stood up for 2 weeks after I felt like my insides were going to fall out and I’d never be the same again 😂😂 I just really don’t want to feel as crappy and physically broken as I did the first time after!

Hiya!! My son wasn’t quite as traumatic as yours, 36 hour labour with 2 hours of pushing and A LOT of stitches afterwards. The pain after for 2 weeks was worse than labour.

My daughter is my second and I woke up 1am with my waters breaking. Went into hospital at 5:30 (was 6cm) and had her at 9am with 16 mins of pushing and no stitches afterwards and the easiest recovery!!

I hope your 2nd goes more smoothly than your first 🫶🏼🫶🏼

Thank you so much @Gemmaemilyx - this is so reassuring! Sounds like we had a similar first experience. I wouldn’t wish that discomfort of those 2 weeks PP on anyone 😂

im so glad your second went a lot smoother and your recovery was easier. I am manifesting this experience 😂 xx

I'm sorry you had such a tough time with your first birth.

Another positive story here, my DD1 was a traumatic birth with a long labour and I felt awful for months afterwards, really difficult to heal.

DD2 was a planned home birth -I was in hospital for DD1 and did not want to repeat the experience - and though DD2 was in a bit of a complex presentation (hand above her head like superman and her arm bent and elbow by her ear) it was a very easy birth. I had a very good midwife who coached me through the pushing stage and I was upright and leaning forward. No need for stitches and no trauma. We walked to the shops, about twenty five minutes away, when she was a day and a half old. I was full of energy and felt great and wanted to be out in the fresh air. I carried her in a sling and can still remember the look of surprise on someone's face when they asked how old she was 😀
Wishing you an easy birth and fast recovery too OP.

@Gee2020 i pray for you it’s better! Most people say 2nd is easier 🤞🏼🤞🏼🤞🏼 keep us updated!! Xxx

Another positive story for you, DS was a hellish 4 day induction which needed a lot of intervention, ended up in theatre for rotational forceps due to positioning, had an episiotomy and almost had to become a very late c-section when he was already halfway out. I could still feel sensation when they were testing if the spinal block had worked so they kept adding more and it took forever to wear off after.

With DD I first thought I was maybe having contractions at 7:30am. By 10:30am (only 8 mins of pushing) I was feeding her!

Definitely think it’s true that second births are easier in most cases. You’re an absolute hero for managing your first, I totally get the fear after a bad experience the first time, but there’s literally nothing you can’t manage after that! x