Head's on fire, should I go away for a few days?

[Ellisnew]

Hi everyone,

I am new here, but I am pregnant with my first. I am 13+6 today according to NHS scan.
I have never posted before, but it has become a norm when googling to add 'mumsnet' at the end of the question. It gives me calm to know I am not alone.

I am a natural worrier, have anxiety and depression and this period is becoming challenging, I know it will get even harder.

I am also changing jobs in January while 5 months pregnant, so that is a massive additional stress, I just couldn't miss the opportunity.

I have this time now where not much is going on in my current job, I mostly work from home and spend most of my days overthinking. I only feel good when my husband is around, which used to be the case, but not like this. Anyone felt similar? I feel like I am depending on him too much to feel okay and not as anxious.

I constantly feel like I am tired and wouldn't mind not doing anything (my main symptom was and still is extreme fatigue, maybe getting a little better), but at the same time I am googling baby yoga/pilates, writing lists of things I need to do (there are hundreds.. need to renovate future nursery completely) and planning getaways... My family is away and I miss them terribly, will visit before Christmas. My main question, I guess, is should I calm down and focus on the house, maybe go away locally, or should I take that trip (I am thinking Italy for 5 days, spontaneously...). I am overwhelmed and travelling helps to turn focus on nice/ anxiety free things. I am worried about catching an illness on a plane or something though...

Let me know if you felt similar and if you have any tips. And please don't judge. I did reach out to TalkPlus for my mental health, but they haven't gotten back to me yet.

Take a breath OP. I can feel your anxiety and how overwhelmed you are through your words.

Pause and breathe.

I absolutely get it. I'm almost 42 years old and 19 weeks pregnant. In the next 6-8 weeks we will be moving back to the UK after living overseas for the last 4 years.
I'm stressing over the house sale and trying to pack everything up, looking after our 4 year old, sorting DH's visa, sorting out getting our dog to the UK. We also have our own business here so trying to bring that to a close before we leave as we haven't been able to sell it.

Then I'm also stressing about having to find a school in the UK for our daughter, purchasing a new home I haven't even seen in person, stressing about having to move into my parents temporarily as a family of 3 with baby on the way and how cramped that's going to be. Worried we won't be in our new home in time for the birth, worried we'll miss the cut off for the lower stamp duty. Worried about the fact I won't even have a job on my return so we'll have to find DH a job immediately and survive on one wage until goodness knows when.

If I focused on it all at the same time I'd be stressed to death! I try not to let it overwhelm me, I make lists and put things in order of priority and do as much or as little as I can each day. I do a little yoga and walk the dog to clear my head a bit and I make a point of not stressing out about things I can't control.

You have to just trust that everything has a habit of working itself out and it's all going to be OK.

If you do find the anxiety is becoming too much and affecting your day to day life then that is nothing at all to be ashamed of. Talk to your midwife, find someone else you can talk to. Your own health is just as important as the life of your unborn baby, if not more so.

Might it be worth contacting your local perinatal mental health service, either directly by googling them or via your GP/ midwife? I had input from them after my baby was born and they were really good. Pregnancy and birth is a huge upheaval in your life, and with all the hormones as well it can really affect your mental health, especially if you're already prone to anxiety and depression. 💐

Thank you both for your replies. I will try to get some help sooner!
And good luck with everything sel2223!

Go for a swim/ a nice walk/ your preferred exercise? It will take your mind off your worries and improve your mental health.