When did you tell everyone you were pregnant?

[purplespink]

I have a private scan booked for tomorrow (10 weeks). DH thinks that if it's all fine, we should tell people soon. I would rather wait until the 20 week scan but I know I'll be showing before then (third pregnancy, had bumps from 15/16 weeks before) and I feel dishonest, like I'm hiding something. I have my family coming to stay in two weeks and I don't want to be keeping this a secret, plus who knows if I'll be sick from morning sickness etc. When did you tell people? TIA

I'm a firm believer that it should be about 14 weeks. Family after 12 week.scan and then others. I held off at work until 18 weeks but we had a loss at 17. I found the bump quite easy to hide with layers / a loose jacket - even in the summer.

Congratulations mama! I told my family & friends just after my 12 week scan with both my babies xx

Congratulations 💐
Parents, six ish weeks, as we were going through the wringer re fertility treatments. Wider family, probably 12 weeks, and everyone else 16ish I think.
This time around, families at 12 weeks, started telling people as and when we saw them/it came up at around 17/18 weeks.

Thanks all  I really don't want to keep it a secret past Christmas, I wouldn't be doing a Facebook announcement or anything, I don't really use it. DH wants to tell family soon providing tomorrow goes well but I don't know if it's too soon?

@Changeyourfuckingcar is your name an F1 reference because if so, I fricking love it and it's the best name I've seen

Told closest family (my mum my sister his mum) around 10 weeks as we had two nhs scans before this. Rest of family after 12 week scan x

@RosesAndHellebores so sorry for your loss

Congratulations on your pregnancy :)

First pregnancy 19 weeks
Second pregnancy sadly miscarried twins
Third and current pregnancy I've been incredibly anxious due to previous loss. I told my mum at 6 weeks because I knew I'd need her support should anything go wrong again. I told a close friend at 16 weeks but have only just announced it publicly this week (23 weeks). I definitely didn't want to do any announcements until after anomaly scan. Did my best to hide bump with baggy clothes / scarves.

It's totally up to you though x

I told people as I physically saw them after we found out at 4 weeks. We didn't do a "pregnancy announcement" though. So that meant some knew at 4 weeks, others (who I had perhaps not seen for a long time - my friends group is spread very wide geographically) not until baby was 6 months old and I posted a picture of us all on Facebook for the first time 🤣

I'm a firm believer in not waiting for a defined period. But that's a very personal choice and based on prior early loss at 6 weeks that struggled through due to not having told anyone yet, and then not feeling able to say "I was pregnant, now I'm not". Which also partly drove my decision to only tell people as I saw them.

@purplespink haha thank you, yes it is 🤣 🏎️
Personally I don’t think there’s any harm in telling family early, if you want to.. and as long as they’re likely to keep it quiet if that’s what you want. I always felt like if something did go wrong, I’d tell them that anyway, and would appreciate support. But it’s a very personal thing!!

I was so ill and with my symptoms, nearly everyone guessed.

With my first and second it was after the 12 week scan. This time my mum knew from 6 weeks because I was going on holiday with her and I was really off/feeling sick so I just told her. Everyone else between 15-18 weeks.

Am 6+5 and in a similar situation and I think it depends why you're telling them. We've told a couple of people early on for admin reasons, really - work (needed time off for a scan for ectopic), parents (in case we have another MMC and need a shoulder), and a friend. (My friend and I were going to a wedding and sharing a room and I CBA to hide my nausea, cramps and general not-party-personality all day and night and it made a difference having someone to cover when I couldn't do shots at the bar and had to sit down for YMCA... 😬) Friend knew we were TTC and wouldn't tell a soul and I'd tell them anyway if I had a loss so it felt right.

I want to tell one of my brothers but know my other brother will hit the roof if he knew he was the last to know...but he was totally blindsided when I told him of my MMC and he didn't seem to know why I was telling him 🤷🏻‍♀️ Preferred brother and wife, on the other hand, have had baby recently and we're very close. We spend a lot of time together but have been bailing recently because I've been knackered and would prefer they just knew the truth. They were also in the same boat with MMC a little while ago and kept us sane.

Ultimately, I think tell people you trust to keep it secret and who would support you if you had a loss. The kind of people who don't ask questions and who make things easier. Fingers crossed for you!

There's no rule. Tell people you could talk to if God forbid something went wrong when you want to. If that's some people literally when you take test fine. If that's no one until after 20 weeks fine. We told immediate family at around 10-12 weeks as we saw them. Some people found out when we saw them 30+ weeks.

I told people as soon as I found out. So at around 8 weeks.

First pregnancy I told people after the 12 week scan.

Second pregnancy I told close family at 6 weeks as I was seeing them every day and it made me feel weird that they didn’t know. Also because I knew I’d need extra support with childcare for the next few weeks. I then told friends as I saw/spoke to them from about 8 weeks onwards.

I’d say just tell people when you feel ready. Ultimately nothing magic happens at the 12 week scan that reduces the risk of a miscarriage to zero overnight. Hopefully in that scan people see a healthy baby with a heartbeat but if you see that two weeks before at 10 weeks before I’m not sure what the difference is. Good luck with the pregnancy whatever you decide :)

I really don’t think there’s a right answer here - just when you are comfortable and your instincts say it’s the right time. I had a social occasion with some of my closest friends
just after I found out at 4 weeks and couldn’t not tell them. I also knew that if something went wrong I’d need their support so there was nothing to lose. I personally can’t imagine waiting past 12 weeks to tell everyone but that is the kind of person I am! Sometimes I wish i
was a bit more private 🤣. This is my first pregnancy though and I haven’t experienced baby loss so maybe I’d feel differently if that did happen.

I had to tell pretty early- 7th or 8th week for both, work and family- because my morning sickness was so rough there wasn't really any hiding it.

We told people after the 12 week scan. We didn’t have any early scans and I didn’t feel comfortable telling people until I’d seen that the pregnancy was going well.

Didn’t announce anything, just told family, friends as I saw them. Work knew, as there was physical aspects of my job. But, 20 weeks was when it was generally out there. Nothing on social media. But also COVID was happening so it was different.

Told parents and siblings at 5 weeks. Figured if anything bad happened, I would want their support so they would need to know.
Told close friends and work after 12 weeks.
Not done a social media announcement

Pregnancy 1. I told work at 5 weeks when I found out, a few colleagues around 8 weeks when i needed them to do something for me. We told my in-laws at 13weeks, my bil at 16 weeks, all of my family at 17 weeks and friends after the 20 week scan

Pregnancy 2 I told work at 5 weeks. A few colleagues around 6-8 weeks due to horrendous sickness and I needed them to know I might not complete some work in time. I miscarried at 10 weeks. I have told friends and colleagues about the miscarriage but not family

Pregnancy 3 I'm only 4 weeks but I've told a friend/colleague already. I've already had some nausea so I've pre warned her that I might have time off over the next few weeks and months but I'll try to keep on top of work she needs from me now so that hopefully there's not too much if the sickness is as bad as previous pregnancies.

With my parents I actively avoid any hints of pregnancy - switching out teabags for my decaf ones. If I'm struggling with sickness I either don't see them or claim it's a migraine which I'm prone too. With my in-laws I'm happy if they come to the conclusion I'm expecting so I don't make excuses just don't say I'm pregnant. I'll happily ask them for decaf drinks etc

About 12-14 weeks. It's not at all uncommon to miscarry before this time so I used to wait until it was more likely to be a successful pregnancy.