Trying to get enough money saved to get away

[Michah89]

Any1 know if I ask social services for help to get away from my abusive ex ? I give birth 11weeks

Hi there it's a labour ward midwife. Yes absolutely tell you midwife at the earliest opportunity so an escape plan could be put in place. You can request an unscheduled community midwife appointment via usual means (email or telephone depending on your hospital). Alternatively, you can go to the maternity assessment unit and disclose the abuse there. You can go with any request. If your abusive partner insists on going with you then I suggest you invent a reason- unspecified abdominal pain, reduced fetal movements, you are worried your ankles are swollen, itchiness in your vagina etc. Slip a note of what is your true reason for attending inside the maternity notes. The midwives will work out a way of ensuring you are seen on your own. Disclosing domestic abuse is an incredibly brave thing to do. It's also incredibly important. Please do get in touch with your midwives

Further to the earlier message- the midwives will liaison with the social services to help you with housing etc

To add to this, I attended 3 different hospitals earlier this year when pregnant for different reasons and the first thing they asked me to do when I arrived was urine sample (if they don’t you could just ask for a toilet) and in the toilets in each of those hospitals there was a notice on the back of the toilet door along with a pack of little red dot stickers. The notice said to pop a red sticker on the bottom of your wee sample cup if you needed help/if your abuser was with you and you need help type thing. Not sure if all hospitals do this now but definitely all 3 of the ones I went to had them so even if he does attend with you it’s possible to discretely ask for help.