Older children

[leighks123]

I feel a bit shit so thought I'd come on here and see what others experiences are.

I'm pregnant with my 5th child, I had my first when I was 17 and he's nearly 18 now. I've just told him and he was not happy at all and now I'm questioning if my decision to have another was a good one.

I'm still young and he is never at home either with his gf or at work so I don't see why he's reacted the way he has. I make sure I don't burden the older ones with any responsibility with the younger ones and they all get the same attention.

It's just made me feel really really shit 😔

Bumped

I'm just 43 and 28 weeks pregnant, I have an 18 year old daughter. Pregnancy was completely unplanned. To begin with my daughter was not best pleased, was worried I think about how her life would be effected negatively (teenagers can be very self centered) but as time went on and with reassurance she came round and is now excited to be having another younger brother ( also have a 13 year old son). He may come round he may not. At the end of the day it's your life he is an adult now, and as you say leading his own life now largely. Don't feel guilty.

Take no notice, he's probably feeling a bit cringe as 18 year olds don't like to think of their parents having sex, also it's a very selfish age where the whole world revolves around them and what they want, they don't really consider their parents as people with their own wants and needs.

He'll come round, congratulations on your pregnancy I've got a 20 year age gap between my 1st and 2nd child, it's worked out fine.

Thank you, I also have a 13 year old who wasn't too keen but came round pretty quick. The younger ones are excited for a new baby was just the eldest reaction that got me feeling a bit shit. He does seem to think the world revolves around him at the moment so I'll put it down to that. Just upsets me that i may of upset my children over a decision I've made 🤷🏻‍♀️

He'll be upset for a small amount of time you'll have another child for life you can't base your decisions off your eldest being momentarily disgruntled . He'll come around x

Hello OP. Congratulations on your pregnancy!!
I have a nown18 Yr old DSand 16yr old DD. New partner and three pregnancies in three years resulting in now DD nearly 2 and DD 5 months ( with a stillbornnDS at 24 weeks before that).
I am 41 now. My older kids didn't know what to think at the time and now the youngest are here, the faces all light up when they see eachother and there is a great dynamic with them. As you have mentioned, I too never leave them to babysit or look after any of their needs unless we are trying to get somewhere in a hurry or the youngest needs fed. It's a bit harder trying to juggle all the needs of each individual child, and obviously when the little ones need me they have to come first as they can't help themselves but I'm so glad my kids are OK with things even though they were horrified at first. Needless to say I won't be having any more lol.
All the best OP x

Maybe he’s embarrassed about how people may view it. Not saying that’s justified and people can do what they want, but having 5 kids is not the norm and in some situations can be a stigma and people do make judgments. Fine if you’re wealthy, not so if you’re poor.

When I initially real the post I thought he was an only child but realised this will be your 5th. It can’t be jealousy as he already has siblings. That’s the only thing I can think of as to why he’d care.