scared of MC?? anxiety around it

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Hello all, I'm 17+1 weeks pregnant and I have non stop been so worried about my little one. I have had an early miscarriage before in first trimester so this would be second pregnancy. I last saw baby at 15w6d and baby was growing beautifully, strong heartbeat! Couple of hiccup type movements but not the most active baby. I've had bleeding at 4/5 and nearly 10 weeks in this pregnancy so that anxiety will always be there. It was caused by a little cyst which they said was common. I've heard so many second/third trimester horror stories I can't help but worry. I've not had movements yet either but I know it's still kinda early x

Anxiety is understandable after a previous loss - and I think the first half of the second trimester is a really difficult 'in between' time in pregnancy. It's usually when you don't have a lot of pregnancy symptoms anymore, you might not be showing really significantly, it's too early for much (if any) movement and you don't have a lot of contact with midwives, so it can leave you second guessing whether things are okay and if everything is normal. I was given some good advice at that stage in my pregnancy about trying to do things to engage with it and make it feel more 'real' - booking antenatal classes, stuff like that - which helped while I was waiting for my 20 week scan. Once I got past that point, I found it generally got easier because more was happening - baby movements, bump growing, appointments etc.

If your anxiety is taking over everything, do get in touch with your midwifery team to see what perinatal mental health support is available to you - low level worry is totally normal but you shouldn't be feeling constantly worried about the possibility of a late loss to the point that you can't focus on other things. Remember as well that late miscarriages and stillbirths are very uncommon - if you go looking for stories you will find them because you can find anything if you search online, but it's not the norm and the odds are that it won't happen to you.

I totally understand OP, though I agree with PP that it’s very early to be feeling much/any movements so please try not to let that aspect worry you at this stage. But I do understand how you can’t “un-know” the second trimester miscarriage stories, even though they are very rare.

I think there are a number of different strategies:

1. Try to enjoy how things are at the moment and do things to make yourself feel positive about the pregnancy, like PP said. Though when I was in your position this wouldn’t have worked for me.
2. Distract yourself with other things until your next scan / when you start feeling more regular movements. Are you in the position to book some nice treats into your diary over the coming weeks?
3. If you really feel that your anxiety is serious and likely to continue, then make it very clear that you need a referral to perimental natal health. And don’t take no for an answer.

I also found useful support via the Tommies charity.

Take care x

Hi OP, don't have much to add in regards to advice but just wanted to let you know you're definitely not alone in how you're feeling.
I'm 10 weeks, had 2 scans already and got another plus NIPT test this week. I've never been as anxious as I have been during this pregnancy, it's horrific.