Would you ?

[WiseDog]

Would you get a termination from the NHS if they said baby had duodenal obstruction and hole in heart and all to down syndrome , I got asked today from the hospital do I want end pregnancy at 33 weeks because of problems and I said wait until I get the results from the amnio today then I'll decide, my hubby on the other hand said get rid if he got down syndrome because I am disabled and he's never here always working and going to be too much at our age me 40 disabled lost of limb and he's 50 hgv driver x

Really sorry you are in this position OP. There's an antenatal tests board where you might get some helpful answers. Did they do any screening for Down syndrome earlier in the pregnancy?

It’s a very personal choice. I wouldn’t, especially not at 33 weeks, but you have to make a decision based on you and your own family. I’m sorry OP, that’s an awful situation to be in.

It will make no difference to your family what other people would do in this situation. It is such a personal thing to have to consider. You are the only one who knows the set up in your household as it stands.

@Pandasnacks I didn't know was pregnant until I was 20+ weeks gone had scan done and they said no signs off down syndrome and then wasn't offered anything but now while baby bigger they are saying he might have downs so had a amnio done today at 33 weeks and all this happened this week so over whelmed none stopped crying x

I’m so sorry you’re in this situation.

Since you’ve asked this question, I’ll answer honestly and say yes, I personally would terminate. It would be horrendous and I’d have a lot of questions but I am fairly sure that is the route I would take. But (I could be wrong) it doesn’t sound like that’s what you want, rather that it’s what your husband wants.

It isn’t his body or decision, remember that.

I agree with this.

It would also depend on the outlook from the two specific issues you mentioned (the obstruction and the heart). I have no medical background so I've no idea whether these can be resolved with a surgery, or whether it means serious lifelong health problems with significant impacts on life.

@shallweorderpizza I don't know what to do to be honest I thought last week I was having a healthy baby but hospital saying there a number of issues now like when he's born he won't be able eat or drink because of this obstruction so intensive care he will be and going to operate soon as he's born then yesterday got told he got a small hole in his heart and got told its all linked with down syndrome because he's got a double bubble they call it and wanted me to have a amnio done said let me speak to hubby first so phoned him and then told hospital they done it today as a emergency so now just waiting on results, don't think I had time to think this week x also got obstetric cholestasis so no sleep and up all night itching x

It must be an absolutely awful worry. I was 42 when I had my baby and my downs results came back high risk (unsurprisingly really.) That week waiting for results felt like forever.

Have you had the harmony test?

I personally wouldn't terminate at 33 weeks, but I would be looking for lots of answers.

I know of a child with similar disabilities to the one you described (although he doesn't have Down's syndrome) and although he is tube fed, his family are really used to it and he loves to sit at the table and join in mealtimes (they think he will be able to eat in the future, but he doesn't want to at the moment). He's such a joy.

@shallweorderpizza No tests apart from the amnio this morning they thought he was healthy didn't pick anything up until this week had 4 appointments this week all for scans and fmau clinic and amnio x got to go a specialist hospital next week for more scans and they said they will go through everything with me x

Yeah they said they will operate when he's. Born cuz he won't be able to eat or drink then there's the other problems too ,won't know anything until next week anyhow x

@WiseDog wishing you all the best. It's such a stress for you. Take it a day at a time & keep asking them questions & gathering the info you need <3 lots of love & best wishes for you and little one.

Aww thanks yeah hubby coming with me on Friday to see the specialist at Liverpool women's hospital in the meantime I should get the results from his down syndrome on Tuesday or Wednesday....its just upsetting I don't want my baby go through pain for rest of life if he has downs cuz at the end of it and if he will be in pain he will probably wishing his life away just have see what the specialist say and if he will have it or not xxx

Take a deep beat OP, I can only imagine how worried and conflicted you are feeling right now.
Try to take it one step at a time, get the amnio, get the results, then take time together to really discuss what is best for you, your hubby and your baby.

If it's bad news then only you can know what is best for you. There should be no judgement either way, it's an extremely personal decision and, unless faced with it, I honestly don't know what I would do.

I'm sorry you are going through this

@sel2223 yeah that's what we are doing hospital was saying on the day do I want to end the pregnancy I said just give me chance and give me time to think and speak to hubby and get the results x

Hi OP, I´m very sorry for your situation.
I´m 41, second pregnancy after a MC, 23 weeks, In my 12 week scan the specialist found soft markers for DS, got our amnio date but for reasons we couldn´t run the test on the amniotic liquid retrieved. I would had terminated if in my country abortion was available, but it wasn´t the case, it is illegal here. My other option was going to my neighbor country, alone, to have it before 24 weeks, but I felt I couldn´t do it after 20 weeks, baby too big, I´m not young and my BP is not fine, anything could happen alone in a strange place. I decided to continue my pregnancy and expect for the best, even when I live in a place with a very bad health system. A DS baby is a big life challenge. Only you know your life, your weakness and your strenght, I can´t judge you for wanting to terminate at 33 weeks, because I undertsnad what is going on in your head. Please, be strong for whatever decision you take, I know it will be the best for you.