Worried of slow growth at 20 week

[BeLemonQuoter]

Hi there everyone, I am looking for similar experiences.

I am 19w4 today according to NHS. It is an IVF baby, so I know that it should be 20w1. I started with twins, then I had bleeding at 8week and at the follow up I have been told one of the twin's heart is not beating any more. Then I had an NT scan at 11w4 and it has shown 1.5mm, but couldn't do the combined test because of the vanished twin. For the same reason, I was not eligible for NIPT, so they did a quadruple test at 15w6. I had a false alarm when I thought that my waters were leaking, but I was just panicking over some extra discharge or who knows, but they did a scan which was all fine. Then the quad test came back 1 in 8 for down, so we did an amnio at 17w4. Luckily the amnio was all clear for down, patau and edward. However I have been warned that the quadruple test results can be caused by placental issues too, so I might get GD, Preeclampsia, high blood pressure, or the baby IUGR or slow growth later. Because of this, I have another scan scheduled in for the 23rd week to measure placental blood flow (end of September) and my anomaly scan is going to be on the 2nd September.

My worry is that I haven't gained any weight in the last since 16 week. I gained a lot of weight (4-5kg) in the first trimester, but nothing since then. I also had bonding scan today for my mum, (she is not from the UK and she won't have any other chance to see the baby before birth)

So the scan was fun, my mum was happy, so do I. However I tend to worry a lot later, and I started to worry, the baby was a bit less active then on the previous scans (still nice heartbeats, everything healthy) though. Should I worry about that? Than there is only one measurement taken on the scan as it was more about "bonding" and it is the head and the head circumference might be a bit small it is 159.2 and it is on around the 15%. Compared to that baby's head was on around 32% on 16w2. So now I am worried that the baby's growth is slowing down and one of the problems foreshadowed by the quad test is going to surface now. I will go on holiday next week, so I am not really sure what should I do. It is probably ridiculous to call the maternity unit with this.

Maybe it is just me getting myself worried again. I should have started one of those AIBU threads, lol.

Anyway, did anyone else had similar? and what could I do for weight gain? any diet recommendation?

From a very relaxed mum to be first baby at 20w I don’t really worry about anything scan related unless professional tells me to during a scan. The maternity unit would most likely just tell you to forget about it because it’s an issue to you but not to them.

I’ve been really sicky so I’ve lost weight, gaining weight isn’t a must and doesn’t mean the baby isn’t growing. Hope you can relax and just enjoy your pregnancy and holiday

They have to tell you if there is anything of concern. The fact they didn't tells you there is nothing to worry about. Measuring a few days out is perfectly normal even in IVF pregnancies, it's not an exact science. Re your own weight gain I only gained 8kg my entire pregnancy, mostly in the 3rd. Our daughter was a healthy 7lb13. Is it worth talking to your midwife/GP about your anxiety? Take care.

Please don’t worry about weight gain, it’s unlikely to be linear - maybe best to step away from the scales. I’m 35 weeks and haven’t weighed since 12 week scan so no idea - your weight isn’t an indicator of progress. All the measurements and week/days of pregnancy are estimated, again baby’s growth isn’t going to be linear. I’ve never heard of a ‘bonding’ scan but I assume it was private and therefore I’d take everything they said with a big pinch of salt. Honestly I think you need to speak to your midwife about managing your anxiety. You can’t compare baby’s movement between scans - their movements won’t be in a pattern that early and even now I’m 35 weeks, the movement is still very random!

and I wouldn’t advise trying to gain weight, you gaining weight won’t make any difference to the baby. Just focus on a balanced healthy diet with lots of nutrients

I think because of everything that has gone on previously you are being hypersensitive. Try and relax. The HCP would tell you if they were worried. Best wishes for the rest of your pregnancy x