Will social services be involved if im pregnant again

[OneNavyViper]

So basically my case is closed and has been for 2 years and ive been frightened to my core of having them involved because it wasnt due to my behaviour in the first place. So long story short my mother was a drinker and got into alot of fights with people and being in dv relationships from me being 8 years old and social services have been in and out of my life since that time and i fell pregnant as soon as i left school and i still had a social worker and i was on child in need at the time and they stayed involved monitored my behaviour and my mothers and she didn't stop drinking in fact this made it worse and the police was phoned 3 times during my pregnancy and my mental health was decreasing (antenatal depression) so they put my son on child protection before he was even born and when i gave birth they moved me from my mums and to my dads which i begged them not to as me and my dad dont get along and being there made me depressed so i got moved anyway and i had them involved for six more months then they closed the case my sons father wasnt involved from the beginning so they didnt really focus on that too much but im pregnant again and im an adult now and i want to keep this baby and have a good pregnancy and birth because i was so traumatised by my last one i have a partner too now and he is amazing he took my son on as his own and hes my saftey net as are my family and life is great at the minute im so worried that they will be involved again as ive moved back to my mums but she doesnt have a drop of alcohol around my son or me anymore and i had to move myself because me and my dad have been clashing and its not a great environment but now im back at my mums im the happiest ive ever been and my partner lives with me and my mum hardly lives here because she lives with her partner and shes trying to downsize her flat so we can both get somewhere with housing my son is starting nursery in 2 weeks and im so worried they will be on my back again ive had so much drama with them over my mum and blamed for things because of her and i really dont think i could handle another situation like this again can someone please give me answers.

Maybe because her mum is trying to move the tenancy to her DD?

I also think if you want to go through all this palaver with “severe overcrowding” and moving tenancy’s and all that bollox for somewhere to live, for cheap, then SS may be the price you pay for not moving out and living independently:

get somewhere to live yourself, or with this man you’ve had a child with, show you can support a family independently without faffing the system and SS won’t have any worry that you’ll make poor decisions for the sake of somewhere cheap to live.

Harsh maybe but hear what I’m saying.

Why would that mean that she (mum) should call social services for advice about daughter’s pregnancy?

I agree with everyone else-you need to move out OP. Can you and your partner find a private rental? It's hard but not impossible. Do you both work?

No one is saying you're a bad mum OP. It's just incredibly chaotic.

Your mum is still an alcoholic. You have got to get your own place. If you let SS know, I believed they will want to try support you. If they know you're still in the house with alcoholic mother, this may increase you eligibility for housing. You need to get out the house. Both your parents are an absolute wreck OP. They will screw things up for you almost definitely

Do you both work? If so, maybe a private tenancy would be a better option?

This is not the point but it’s something I hear so often:
i have a partner too now and he is amazing he took my son on as his own and hes my saftey net

Don’t rely on a man to be your safety net: build yourself up so that you can stand on your own two feet if needed. I’m not saying get rid of your partner; I’m saying invest in yourself.

There is not a single full stop in any of this. It is almost unbearable to read for me and I imagine others.

I think it’s cruel and unnecessary for people to keep raising this when OP has quite clearly told us that she was the subject of child protection proceedings throughout her secondary education, and then pregnant and child rearing during the allotted time period for higher education.

Many of us here have managed to extrapolate the salient points from the post, if you’ve found yourself disinclined to do that then there was really no need at all for you to comment.

It’s highly likely they will be involved, especially because you’re back at your mum’s. happy to read she’s now sober, but to them she’s probably still going to be a risk. like others have suggested, are you able to privately rent with your partner?

You grew up with a drunk mother, DV in the house, were identified as a Child in Need and fell pregnant as a teenager.

Despite all this, SS closed the case after 6 months. You really should be proud of yourself!

Yes, they will be involved again to make sure you have the right support and set-up this time round. My relative was under SS recently due to mental health issues but she loved her social worker - she was genuinely really helpful. Just take any help they offer and show lots of willing.

But you do need to sort out your living situation. Have you tried Citizens Advice?

@WhoOfWhoville thankyou. You restore my faith in MNs capacity for decency and compassion 💐

I would myself write like this when feeling utterly desperate and frantic.