Hate being pregnant...

[minnirose]

I'm overjoyed to be having a baby, it was very much planned and wanted baby. And I feel bad for saying it - but I hate being pregnant.
I've been very lucky in that I've had zero sickness or nausea so far, my moods been great and my DH has been great, now 23 weeks.

But I've had terrible acid reflux, I suspect I've got sciatica in my lower back, I get up from sitting down and can't walk for a minute of two until it all loosens up, broken sleep (mostly due to back pain) and I just feel disgusting and fat and frumpy. I think the biggest dislike for me is watching my body literally change before my eyes, seeing the weight gain in my face, my arms, my thighs and ass. I look in the mirror naked and absolutely hate was I see.
I wouldn't consider myself a vain person at all - but I've always been petite, never been bigger than a size 8, quiet small boobs at a 32C. And I just hate being bigger and I know I've still got 16 weeks left of growing.
I've expressed it to my husband and he gives me the reassurance that of course my body is going to change I'm growing a baby and it's only temporary but I'm just hating it. I feel ugly and fat and unsexy and unattractive. I hate looking at myself in the mirror. I hate deciding what to wear and it's worse that it's summer so I can't wear the big coats or baggy jumpers when out.
And I can't stop eating - once I start, it's like a bottomless pit that can't be filled. And I'm mostly craving crap. Sweets, cake, chocolate, crisps, ice cream.... I've tried buying fruits etc. I'll eat them but I'm not satisfied and then have to follow it up with crap.

I'm already wishing the pregnancy away so I don't have to eat as often to help my growing baby, after if I go hungry I go hungry! But I can't do that now being pregnant. (Skip meals)

Is this a normal feeling? Or am I being ridiculous?

you sound exactly like me!! Currently 29 weeks with DD2 and so fed up. lol I am not one of those women who enjoys being pregnant or feels like they have a “glow”. Just feel like a fat frumpy whale! Normally a size 10 and love exercise but just got nothing in the tank to do it.

I was the same, but somehow it got better in the third trimester. Up until 28 weeks, I just felt fat. Since I’m 32 weeks, I think I have a nicely formed bump, I suddenly feel comfortable in my clothes showing it, and I’ve even just booked a pregnancy photo shoot there are zero photos of me pregnant between 10-28 weeks because I felt so uncomfortable!).

3rd baby here and I usually get a 4 week window where I dont hate it. I'm 17 weeks and still having nausea and vomiting. My skin is shit. I never "glow." Stomach is somewhere between ate a big curry and possibly pregnant, dependant if it's been half a week since I've managed to have a poo.
Some people love it. Some of us do not.
On the plus though I love the newborn stage, which every one else seems to think is the worst 🤫😜

I have three children. I hated being pregnant. I know there are women who love being pregnant but me - I just wanted the babies!
I was sick, tired and moody. The last couple of months were fine, I blossomed then i think, because the nausea went and I was just excited about meeting them.

And I learned that nothing compares with the fatigue of early pregnancy - even newborn sleepless nights.

It doesn't mean you won't love your baby 💕

I have at times struggled with my my changing body during this pregnancy (now 26w). As well as the weight gain, I've developed lipomas/they've enlarged massively all over my upper legs because of the hormonal changes, which make me look like I have the cellulite of an 80yo. Unlike the weight gain, they will be permanent unless I get them surgically removed, which I won't be able to do until I finish breastfeeding. I do not feel good about parts of my body right now at all.

In terms of the weight gain, I'm doing my best to simultaneously ignore and embrace it:

• I'm trying to focus on getting nutritious food in, but am allowing myself some treats.
• I've boxed up all my pre-pregnancy clothes and put them in the attic so that I don't keep trying to put them on and feeling rubbish. This has helped a lot btw - only leaving out clothes that still fit and make you feel good, and when you grow out of something, sling it in a bag or box in the bottom of the wardrobe to send to the attic - then you don't keep picking up the same item and trying to get into it, or looking at it and being sad that you can't wear it.
• I've also used this process to cleanse my wardrobe of anything I'm unlikely to wear post-pregnancy, or didn't make me feel good to start with - for example, I've binned all my old and uncomfortable bras. I have no idea what size I'll be long-term but if they were uncomfortable before pregnancy there's absolutely no way I want to consider wearing them again.
• I've bought bigger, softer bras and bigger knickers as I was getting fed up of everything digging into my chest and legs, particularly in the hot weather. I've bought a few maternity items, enough to have some choice but not an entire wardrobe, and also a few things that work for maternity but will also fit long-term: I'm really loving the matalan linen shorts for this. They're still my normal size 8 so will fit me long-term, but they're still fitting over bump even now with plenty of room and they feel really cool for summer.

In terms of embracing it, I've ordered a nice maternity frock that covers my legs so you can't see all the lumps, and am going to have some photos taken of me/us with bump.

The biggest thing for me is just feeling huge. I've got what I think it a pretty big bump at 23 weeks, I work in a customer facing roll and when I say I'm due in December people seem shocked that I'm so big already.... of course I have nothing to compare it to being my first pregnancy. My mum keeps telling me it's because I was so small before, but I hate it.

Its also just dawned on me, I was a smoker before I fell pregnant, I stopped when I found out I was pregnant, and I think that's another reason for all the crap I'm eating.. it's like a replacement almost. Whereas normally I'd get up and go have a fag, I'm reaching for a bag of crisps or 3 or a bar of chocolate.

Like yesterday, I ate fish and chips (from a chippy), then a bag of 5 fresh sugared donuts, then later I had a bowl of tomato soup and 3 pieces of cheese on toast, then ate 4 bags of crisps! It's making me all anxious about what my body is going to be like post birth...

I can deal with the acid reflux, even the bad back... it's the weight gain that's making me miserable!

You're definitely not alone OP.

I hated being pregnant first time round. I felt fat and frumpy, puffy, I had awful skin, I was nauseous until about 20 weeks, very anxious, I had teeth issues, got appendicitis at 30 weeks, developed pre-eclampsia and swelled up like a whale. I was heavily pregnant in summer so I was constantly sweating and in a bad mood.

This was also during covid so I had to go through most of it alone as my partner was stuck in another country.

Now pregnant with our second and so grateful but the nausea is getting me down again and I already feel massive as I'm so bloated. Also a lot more stressed and anxious this time round.

I am only 9 weeks and I feel guilty saying that I am miserable. I am so happy I am having a baby but I honestly am miserable. I am bloated, and feel nauseous all day all night , I am moody and on the edge of worry constantly. I’m genuinely not enjoying it one bit xxxxx