New employer completely humiliated me for being pregnant.

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Hi all, sorry if this isn’t the right place to write this post, I’m new here. Just needed to vent!

About a month ago I got an interview for a job I’d been wanting for a very long time. It’s in health & social care and I’ve never had that sort of job before so I was, of course, over the moon when I was offered the job on the spot.

The paperwork and onboarding process took a while and in that period of time, I found out I am pregnant. I found out two weeks after the interview, the pregnancy was not planned but myself and my partner have made the decision to go through with the pregnancy, and we are happy with our decision.

A few days ago I was invited to come to an induction for the new job, it lasts about a week where we get all trained up. I wasn’t planning on telling my employers I was pregnant until the end of the first trimester (I’m 9 weeks as of now) however I was given a form to tick off any health issues or conditions I may have that could affect my ability to take part. Pregnancy was one of the options and I didn’t want to lie, so I ticked it. This hasn’t stopped me from doing any of the induction tasks since it’s all my own choice and risk, although I’ve been feeling very much up to the job.

This is where the title of my post comes in. Yesterday I had just finished yet another day of induction and the manager called me into her office to discuss my pregnancy and do a “risk assessment”. At this point I’ve done nearly all the training and am nearly ready to start working shifts on the floor. She asked me if I knew I was pregnant at the time of the interview, to which I said no (which is true!) and she raised her eyebrow at me as if to say I was lying! She then said “you can work but this might not be the job for you”.

Not the job for me? Because I’m pregnant? Seriously? I feel really discriminated against tbh. Just the conduct and her tone of voice and passive aggressiveness has made me feel really humiliated. Why make me go through all the training, KNOWING I was pregnant, only to imply you may or may not fire me? I’m so upset.

Probably she is being unreasonable and could communicate better, but also there is little information about nature of the job... If it is mostly admin - that is one thing, if it involves possible contact with bodily fluids/moving people around, then she might be actually right.

It does involve moving people around however it’s not strenuous at all since we would be using hoists, not actually moving them personally. The other manager who I spoke to said another lady had just gone on maternity leave and she was able to do everything while she was heavily pregnant because of the amount of things they have that means you don’t actually have to physically touch or lift someone, so it feels somewhat like I’ve been singled out!

You can't hoist someone without physically touching them. If the job literally involves "moving people about" you can see why they're not best pleased to find they've taken on a pregnant woman.

Not all jobs ARE suitable for a woman in end stage of pregnancy but you can say to her that you’re very happy to be pregnant though it’s a surprise and it’s not a permanent state so hopefully you’ll be fit as a fiddle throughout and be delighted to come back after mat leave. Does she know how early you are? That would give weight to the truth that you didn’t know at interview.

It’s discrimination. Against the law. Sorry you’re having to deal with this. I think you should log all this with HR now.

What is? 🙄 Op has not suffered any discrimination.

Once again I’m staggered how many people think it’s acceptable to voice these ideas that it’s not ok for a pregnant women to change jobs, and it’s ok for employers to make rude comments.

OP I hope you do well at your new job; perhaps an in person conversation rather than ticking the form might have been better though felt awkward.

Write down anything that seems discriminatory with note of time date context etc.
also, perhaps try practicing a response: ‘I’m sorry, I thought you said x which obviously can’t be right. Could you say that again?’ They’ll rarely say it twice. Or the more forceful, ‘I’m sure you know that could be construed as discrimination. What did you mean to say?’

Making someone’s job harder, suggesting they shouldn’t be in the role, being negative towards them purely because they are pregnant is discrimination.

I can see why they would be pissed off, someone has gone on mat leave and the new hire is already preggers BUT the manager shouldn’t have made that know to you or made any comments unless you will be unable to fulfil the role due to your pregnancy.

Absolutely this comment from your manager is discriminatory on the grounds of a protected characteristic and therefore against employment law.
I would make a a record of their words as closely as you can remember OP, then email yourself your recollection of the conversation. You may need to escalate to HR if the problem with this staff member is ongoing.

This view is horrendous and exactly the reason that pregnant women need additional legal protections in the workplace. What sort of nonsense is "you can see why they're not best pleased"? What right does anyone's employer have to an opinion on whether they become pregnant or not? The OP might have got pregnant 12 months into the job, would that also be something the manager would have the right to feel aggrieved about? If you hire women of childbearing age, then they might at some point get pregnant, that's just life and as an employer you have to deal with it. By implying that the OP should go and get a different job because she's pregnant, her manager is discriminating against her.

OP - it's so difficult because nobody wants to rock the boat in a new job, but I'd suggest having a written record of any interactions with your manager about your pregnancy, so if you have a meeting about it follow up by email to summarise what you have discussed or agreed. And make sure that you email your HR department to tell them that you are pregnant - there are additional redundancy protections for pregnant women that kick in as soon as you formally notify your employer that you are pregnant, which hopefully you won't need but may give you some reassurance in the event that your manager tries anything underhand to try and push you out of the role.

I'm with them.

They’ve just gone to all the trouble and expense of recruiting someone who’ll be in the role less than six months before going on maternity leave for up to a year and with no guarantee you’ll come back. The whole time you’re working you’ll be getting up to speed and needing accommodations, time off etc. Any hiring manager would be pissed off. They’ve got a new hire and will have to start the whole process again for maternity cover.

She shouldn’t have said it but everyone would be thinking it.

This is not entirely true.

Pregnancy doesn't protect you from redundancy as long as the redundancies are based on legitimate business need rather than getting rid of you because you're pregnant. Also, as long as the redundancy process is fair, open and involves appropriate consultation with all parties.

Also redundancy wouldn't apply to the OP as she is in her probation period. As the OP is in the probation period they can realistically get rid of her as unsuitable for the role, as long as they don't cite pregnancy and they create a paper trail that justifies their actions. A line managers non verbal communication of pregnancy disapproval is one person's word against another, unless you have a witness.

People make the mistake of thinking HR is on their side, it's not true. HR are there to protect the company. The rest is window dressing.

I say this OP not to stick the knife in but so you can brace yourself if they go down this path.

They've just spent a significant amount of money recruiting and training you, to do a job which is going to have to be significantly adjusted for you for next 6 months. You will then go on maternity leave for months and likely never return. The law is on your side, but can you not see why they're a bit pissed off?

Absolutely this. Write everything down now before you forget.

I’d be surprised if they’ll even allow you to hoist while pregnant.

It's not just hoisting, it’s moving and handling.

When I hoist my adult son he will often kick out accidentally. I’ve been kicked in the stomach too many times to mention.

I wonder whether you might not pass your probation.

Misogynist, sexist and breaking the law

Get you.

My point about the redundancy protection is that if the manager tries to engineer a reason to get rid of the OP, she is protected - because "the post holder is pregnant and I'm annoyed about it because it's an inconvenience to me" is not a legitimate business reason to dismiss someone. Pregnant women are also prioritised for suitable alternative employment for, if any is available, in the event of a consultation and possible redundancies. The OP hasn't said anything about a probationary period so we have no idea what the terms of her employment are - but either way, in the event of a possible dispute it is in her best interests to ensure that the HR department is aware of the pregnancy.

Op has literally just started the job, (first day?) and you're advising her to complain to HR because her manager was not best pleased to discover she was pregnant, in a job that involves heavy lifting?
Way to have her card marked.

What will happen next is that they'll be a lot more careful of what they say and you can bet they'll be keeping a close eye on you.

I'm in that line of work and it's doable for pregnant people.
Follow your moving and handling training

Where does the OP say she isn't intending to return from maternity leave? That's a strange assumption to make, given that most women return to work after they've had a baby. And no, they have no right to be "pissed off" - it's an inconvenience at most, which thousands of employers manage around all the time. Maybe it's because if women didn't have jobs there wouldn't be enough people in the workforce, and if women didn't have babies there wouldn't be any people full stop. 🤔

I love the way that some posters seem to think that hard fought for protections in employment law for pregnant workers are 'understandably annoying' . Because of the potential inconvenience to the business..

Anyone who actually thinks this way needs to wobble their heads. What next ? A bit of 'casual racism' just innocuous 'banter' ?

Laws are there for a reason.

Something similar happened me, but the job was covering a maternity leave....so I had to go.on maternity leave from the maternity leave.
When I told my boss, she spoke to the chair of the board and came back to me to tell me that,it was OK, as long as I didn't knownin the interview!
I really didn't know when I accepted the job, but I know they didn't believe me .
I often wonder what they would have done if I said yes, I knew.