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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Original poster

Single, pregnant and lonely

2 replies

charlotteeeeeeq · 23/07/2024 20:23

Hello all,

I'm posting this as I'd love some support.

I recently came out of a long term relationship where we'd been about to start trying for a child, I'd had fertility testing and very low egg reserve was found. Unfortunately the relationship had to end, as I found out he'd been cheating throughout the entire relationship. I was devastated that he'd wasted years of my life especially at my age (mid 30s) and we'd been planning a future.

After the breakup; I'm embarrassed to say but went on holiday a few weeks after and had a holiday fling, and fell pregnant. I've decided to go ahead with keeping baby due to my age, fertility situation and the baby's father is supportive of my keeping the child (albeit we don't know each other well, I wouldn't be reliant on him if he did turn around and not want to be involved).

It feels like a blessing; as following my breakup I thought this would never happen. However I am feeling very sad, at the same time. I'm feeling rubbish and lonely, and thinking about my ex a lot and it's hard because now I'm pregnant it's harder to find other distractions if you know what I mean.

I dont know if anyone has been in this situation, I know I'm ready to be a mum I just feel really sad about the situation not being how I'd planned. Will this all be worth it?

No judgment and kind words only please

OP posts:
ETsJourney · 23/07/2024 22:36

I haven't been in this situation but I can imagine it's hard. You might have very conflicting emotions at the same time (sadness/depression about the break up and happiness/hope about the baby), which is totally normal but it can also cause a lot of stress, making you even sadder and confused.
Being a single mum can be hard but its definitely possible. Especially if you have or invest in a support system. Maybe the baby's father will consider co-parenting or other ways to help.
As an outsider I could say you are - not undermining your emotions - 'lucky' about the break up. It could be that the fertility problem wasnt only yours, but also your ex, or the genetic match between you. Breaking up gave you the chance to get pregnant, which is wonderful as you want the child.

Original poster
charlotteeeeeeq · 23/07/2024 23:14

ETsJourney · 23/07/2024 22:36

I haven't been in this situation but I can imagine it's hard. You might have very conflicting emotions at the same time (sadness/depression about the break up and happiness/hope about the baby), which is totally normal but it can also cause a lot of stress, making you even sadder and confused.
Being a single mum can be hard but its definitely possible. Especially if you have or invest in a support system. Maybe the baby's father will consider co-parenting or other ways to help.
As an outsider I could say you are - not undermining your emotions - 'lucky' about the break up. It could be that the fertility problem wasnt only yours, but also your ex, or the genetic match between you. Breaking up gave you the chance to get pregnant, which is wonderful as you want the child.

Thank you, it's true...it's just such a crazy journey and so many mixed emotions like you say. Hopefully I will get there and the sadness just turns to excitement

OP posts:
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