Red spotting - worried - *PICTURE INCLUDED*

[AOMum14]

Hello,

I am struggling. Really struggling. Constnat panic attacks. I am almost 9 weeks pregnant and suffer from OCD/PTSD. I lost my son in the third trimester.

Now I'm pregnant again, I cannot relax. I have been struggling with constipation and when straining (unsuccessfully) to have a poo, when I wiped the tiniest streak of red blood was mixed with my usual discharge. I called EPU who said they were not concerned and to only worry if more came. Picture is included - it's dried on tissue at this point but was mixed in with discharge.

I am so scared. I have some cramping but feel it's most likely linked to my constipation. I worry hugely as I'm constantly scared that I have a prolapse and so have put my finger in to investigate and now worry that I've also added an infection.

Need some light and hope
Thank you all so much x

I'm so very sorry to hear about your late term loss. Pregnancy after loss of any kind is extra tough but I imagine that it is even more of a strain when you got so far along.

I'm currently 36wks after 3 first trimester losses last year and this pregnancy has been tough mentally. I also had 3 bleeds early on - the last was at 14wks and included clots which was particularly distressing but thankfully all has been ok.

In all honesty, I can't see any sign of bleeding on the photos you have shared. I think you are (understandably) on hyper alert to every possible thing that might be going wrong. But this, to me, doesn't look worrying (and I've been there on the hyper-alertness myself!)

I think the best thing you can do at this point is prioritise your mental health. Do you have a bereavement midwife or have you had MH support for your loss and then for this new pregnancy? I spoke with someone after my third loss last year and then unexpectedly fell pregnant again and as she was already in touch she supported me through the early stages of this pregnancy which was really helpful.

There really isn't an easy or right way through I don't think but I found prioritising my MH, and getting support where possible really helped with the complete lack of control I had over how everything was progressing. It helped me to be able to be a bit more fatalistic and reframe my fears. And slowly but surely, one day at a time, the pregnancy crept along.

Sending you very best wishes for a healthy pregnancy 💗

I'm so sorry for your current difficulties and for the loss of your little baby boy.

I agree with the above, I honestly can't see any blood on the photos you posted so there really is no current evidence that anything is wrong.

Have you had your first midwife appointment? Are the perinatal mental health team involved? They may be able to help you with your (understandable) anxieties and difficulties.

Please try not to worry, thinking of you x

@WickWood @SnookyPook Thank you so much. I have attached an image which is clearer (zoomed in on picture 1 - same picture just cropped to give idea of size) but as you can tell I am anxious over something tiny. I'm hoping it's just a sensetive cervix but resisting the urge to 'investigate' and strain more to see if anything else is up there.

My EPU have been helpful and peri-natal have been in touch but wish I had someone avaliable 24/7 as being left to my own thoughts is difficult! Thank you for your lovely suggestions

I had similar and it wasn't anything. Apparently my DM had regular bleeding all through her last pregnancy and my brother was born completely healthy. I'd say the signs are good from what you've said, I hope it all goes well.

With that amount it's highly, highly unlikely anything is wrong, but its totally understandable that you're hypervigilant given the loss you have experienced.

Have you had an early viability scan already? If you have and the baby had a heartbeat then that dramatically reduces the risk of anything being wrong! Obviously there is always a risk, as you know, but it's much smaller once you've seen your healthy baby wriggling away.

Take your pregnancy one day at a time. Do you have someone at home you can chat to when you're struggling? If not, or you want outside perspectives, we are always here! X

@AOMum14 that certainly doesn't look like it's come from your womb. It's either cervix or bum and is most likely a result of straining with your constipation. I agree with @WickWood and also seconding that we are hear for you as well as whatever other support you have. There are some lovely supportive 'pregnancy after loss' threads on here too where you will find plenty of women who are also struggling with the added anxiety that pregnancy after loss brings. Hugs x