Is 45 year too late to become a father?

[patins]

I am almost 37 years old and found out that I am pregnant for the third time. The pregnancy was not planned and I don't know if I can go through with an abortion. However, I can't stop thinking about my husband and the fact that he will be almost 46 years old when this baby is born. Do you think 45 years is too late to become a father? Please give me your honest opinion...

Nope. My husband was almost 50. It’s not an issue at all.

My husband was 46 when his last child was born and while he would have rather had his kids in his 30s rather than his 40s he's fine. Just has to be a bit careful when at the playground as he's prone to acting like a kid and injuring himself 😆

Of course not. The issue is being involved and loving not a certain age.

I keep thinking he will be 75 when this child is 30 and I am not sure if this is fair for any of them :(

Sounds like you’ve already convinced yourself so 🤷‍♀️

Depends on many factors and lifestyle choices. If he is in good health, active, good diet, doesn't smoke/abuse alcohol, does not have chronic conditions, life long learner - it should be fine. If he is already overweight/diabetic/alcoholic, does not routinely work out, does not like learning new things - it all only go downhill from there. So you're basically on your own. Which also might be fine, many women are.

Well, you'll be 67 💁

Why didn’t you think about this before you got pregnant? With all due respect you have had 3 pregnancies already - there was no need to add another one if you didn’t want a child.

No, my grandparents brought up my cousin - my grandad would have been in his late 60s by then and was still active and healthy into his 90s

I think it's slightly too old yes.

20s and 30s is the time to be having children ideally.

Go for it if it's something you really want, but I don't think it's ideal... but then what is?

We have two children. This was not a planned pregnancy.

If you’re both in good health and have good finances, it is fine. You just need to be able to support a child through education (you don’t need to still be paying for them when they are 30).

You also never know how long you have.

If you want the child please keep it. Don’t let age 45 be a factor.

My eldest is 31, youngest is 28. DH is 73. It’s not a problem. DH cuts DC2 100 ft long privet hedges twice a year, and helped DS1 lay a new lawn over the last BH weekend. We have helped both with decorating etc (I’m 70).

30 that's nearly middle aged 😂 if you and DH nurture and love your child in sure your child by the age of 30 won't need thier 75 year old dad to wipe there ass

It feels more like you're looking for a reason to end the pregnancy than anything tbh. How does your husband feel about it? How old will he be when your other children turn 30 and what determines how acceptable or not this is? There are kids whose Dads are in their twenties and die young for various reasons. Life is always random.

I find it a bit of an odd question really. I get that the pregnancy was unplanned but if you've managed to conceive a natural pregnancy then nature itself has deemed you both of acceptable age. 🤷🏼‍♀️

My dad was 45 when I was born and and seemed like an old man compared to my friend's dads, his age was very noticeable and not in a good way. But that was in the 70s. These days it wouldn't be so unusual.
My brother is mid 40s with a toddler and he doesn't seem old.

But... there is a jump in aging around 50 imo, both energy and looks wise. Your husband might not get mistaken for a toddlers grandad in his late 40s but when he's coming up 60, with a teenager, people will assume he's the grandad. He'll also be knackered.

I think half the dads in my son's class were pushing 45 if not already older when they had their last...

My DH was 53 when our DS was born. No issues.

Age is just a number, how many people die young and don't get to spend time with their kids. If you both want the child then age should be irrelevant.

My dad was 47 when I was born. I'm a twin. It was fine.

No, of course not. What is his general approach to life like?

I was 45 when I became a mum for the first time. Ds' dad was 56. No medical assistance, it just happened. 🙂

DS is 16 now, happy, healthy, well balanced, waiting for GCSEs.

Enjoy your pregnancy. xx

My partner was 49 when my now 4yr old was born. No problems really.

I was 43 when I had my last one now 5. Keep myself fit and healthy. Kids know I am older than their friends dads. Youngest asked me if I exercise in the morning so I don’t die 😂 . They were long waited for and I wouldn't change a minute of it .

Good luck with everything x

This is now extremely common, not an outlier situation. The reality is that in terms of health and outlook, some at 45 are indistiguishable from those in their 30s and some are closer to 50s already: it's person specific. Either way, doesn’t seem like a big deal objectively but it's your collective view as a couple that matters.

My parents had their children in their late 20s/early 30s and neither lived long enough to see any of their children turn 25. The future is not guaranteed.