Anxiety/depression

[Starjumpfifty]

I don't really know where to begin.
I'm 8 weeks pregnant with a planned pregnancy but my head is a mess. I know it's early days but, despite feeling absolutely awful most days with nausea and exhaustion, and having had two scans (second showed a heart beat), every day I think the baby has died. I can't get excited or attached. I'm not "taking care" of it or making any effort to eat well like I did with my first. My relationship is awful and we argue a lot. I'm sure he's a narcissist. I already don't want him on the birth certificate and I don't know how I'll cope, or if I even want a baby in reality. I have a 7 year old from a previous relationship so I know how hard the baby and toddler stages are. I only really wanted a second so that she could have a sibling in her future. Abortion not an option for me personally.

Just take it day at a time I’m the same and to start with I was really poorly I’m not 29 weeks 5 days still fight everyday to make myself do normal stuff to keep my head straight it won’t last forever and if you speak to your doctors they can give you stuff to help I wa son meds before I got pregnant had to come off due to sickness but going back on then in next few weeks as finding it hard so your not alone try be kind to yourself rest up all the other stuff will be there another day to sort x

I'm feeling exactly the same. My partner has been a star since the beginning though. Apart from that, I feel sh*t.
I always wanted to have a baby but the idea of being pregnant is horrendous for me and right now (10wks) with nauseas since week 5 and feeling very sick constantly while working I don't feel excited at all with the baby. I always postponed the pregnancy until now I am 38 (39 in Oct), so imagine how bad the idea was for me and even so we planned we were going to get IVF because for 2 years we struggled to get me pregnant (we started when I was 36) and suddenly, after started to talk with the clinic I found myself pregnant. And I was happy the first day and then I felt I ruined my life and my partner's. My health is not great atm hoping to improve soon 🤞 my partner's family and mine are over the moon and even my mum is telling me to buy this and that and she's super excited. I feel really bad because I'm not at all. I have the feeling that something is going to be wrong. Maybe the next scan (for Down syndrome and the other two) is going to show something wrong with the baby and all my healthy issues and suffer would worth nothing. And this thoughts make me cry every now and then. I feel very anxious about the whole thing and how this is going to change all our life's and if this has been a good idea.

I hope it helps my experience to make you feel you are not alone.