Husband unable to attend 36w growth scan

[Pregnantthenscrewed]

This is my 2nd baby, fingers crossed no issues so far. My husband has realised he now has an urgent meeting with work where he needs to be in Manchester for a day which happens to fall on my 36 week growth scan date (in about 4 weeks time) I am beyond upset that he can’t come, what happens if there is bad news etc? Also they will likely discuss my birth plan because I had a c section last time.

what shall I do? Is it a big deal if he can’t come? Are they able to move appointments?

Changing time depends on your area. In mine it was dire. When I needed a growth scan booking at 28 weeks the next available scan date was after my due date. So every single weekly scan was me on standby. I'd get a phone call with a cancellation appointment. If I was lucky I got 3 days notice. Once I got a phone call and the appointment was in under an hour (luckily I worked very close to the hospital). They were putting on weekend scan clinics to try catch up with all the people needing scans. Sometimes there wasn't even consultant appointments available after so I'd get that appointment on a different day.

Ask to move if it really bothers you but I’d just go my own.

You'll be fine. I went to all of mine alone during COVID.

Just ring to change it. What if it was you with the essential work meeting? They'd have to change it then as well right 🤷‍♀️

I think it would be fine on your own, but you could try and change with enough notice. I had a high risk pregnancy with DC3 and a 2.5 year old with no childcare. I had to take him with me to scans every two weeks near the end (strapped in pushchair and handed an apple as we went in). DP did come to my first pregnancies. I can understand you wanting him there near the later stages. I also didn't see much on the growth scans when baby was bigger. Good luck!

Surely most mums attend scans on their own at some point in the pregnancy. I really wouldn’t think twice about it OP.

My husband missed several scans and emergency trips to triage as he lives on the other side of the world but my mother attended a few of my appointments with me as I had complications from the minute I tested positive. If you’re worried about the outcome and want your partner with you then rearrange.

You're being quite dramatic. You'll go alone and you'll be fine.

@Pinkymummy why would your husband live the other side of the world?

Are you expecting something to be wrong ? I went to the last few on my own was no point in dragging my DH with me and using his work holidays needed him more once baby came.

Um unless you've had a problematic pregnancy then you are being a bit dramatic. I had my first scan with my babies without my husband and it didn't even occur to me to have him come! And I was over 40 so part of the scan was to measure the nucal fold for any sign of possible abnormalities. He did make it to the all important 'what are we having' 20 week scans.

I went to later scans alone as it was covid lockdown and I was fine, I was still nervous but that wouldn't have changed if my partner was there or not.

My sonographer said most women attend the 36 week ones by themselves, I have for my two pregnancies. You can't really see anything, and they're just doing measurements so I'd say it's the one he can definitely miss and you'll be fine!

I had scans around the same time with DD2, it didn’t even occur to me that DH would try to take time off work to come!

My husband didn’t attend mine as he was home looking after our other children. Didn’t bother me as I had quite a few growth scans. However I was admitted after it and kept in as baby hadn’t grown and so had the baby that night. (Obviously my husband came to the hospital as soon as I told him!).

I had growth scans from 28 weeks with DS. DH came to the first one because he hadn’t been able to attend the early ones. But that was the only one he attended.
The last one I had was at 35wks and was actually the best scan, the baby looks like a baby and no longer an alien. Seeing DS at 35wks allowed me to start bonding with him, I’d had a really problematic pregnancy and after multiple miscarriages prior to that I had disassociated from the fact I was carrying a live baby. I got to meet him a week later and I think the rather intimate scan with just me and the sonographer was lovely. She took her time and sort of checked over him with me. It really was the first time in the pregnancy when I felt that I was going to end up with a live birth. It also confirmed that despite all the problems, DS was going to be a big baby. All the worries that they had re his development melted away.

I had to have growth scans (think i had 3 in total) dh didn't come to the 40 week one due to work .

They thought the water looked murky so decided to induce (dh was an hour away) it was fine. He came back stayed with me till around 9pm. Went home got a call at 2am to come in. Ds born at 5am.

Obviously the reason for your growth scan is important. Mine was because first baby was 6.3. Even though 2nd baby was 9lb and ds was 8.4 in the end. So I wasn't too worried. Also how far away is Manchester to you?

My DH didn’t come to growth scans (I had many), only 10,12 and 20.

You really don’t need him there.

I went to all my growth scans alone, my partner only attended the major ones. (12/20 weeks)
They did discuss with me my birth plan at 36 weeks but as I knew what I wanted it didn’t much differ from that.
Im sure you will be absolutely fine :)

I am surprised by this. Surely you just go yourself. It’s a non-issue. You’ll be fine to deal with it yourself.

I've gone to all my growth scans by myself (currently 33 weeks). My last baby was born during COVID so didn't have a choice but to attend scans solo then so it doesn't seem like a big deal whatsoever now. They take about 10 minutes, then just lots of waiting around for 2 minutes appointment for a nurse and 5 minute appointment with a consultant.

If I was told there was a problem then I would ask him to be there and he would but otherwise not an issue.

I went to most scans and appointments by myself as DH was working. I didn't even think about it being an issue.