Does your DP/ husband show much of an interest in your pregnancy?

[henryhoover5]

Currently 25 weeks with our second and he doesn’t show any interest at all. Never asked to feel baby moving, touches my bump or about baby’s development, never talks about things we need for baby etc. Is this normal?

There is nothing ‘normal’ about pregnancy OP. Each is its own world. That said it must be hard for you if you would like more attention (some women would hate it and that’s also ok).
See it’s your second child - what was he like with first? Did he want a second? Did the first birth go ok? There could be many factors.

Can’t say my partner was particularly in to my pregnancy, I think it felt a bit too surreal for him. I can probably count on 1 hand the amount of times he touched my bump and he wasn’t able to come to all the scans with me either so not much interest from that point. But he was incredibly caring and supportive in other ways and is a wonderful dad who’s really involved.

Hey OP. My pregnancy is high risk and it’s my first - my partner already has a 16 year old daughter. He has touched my bump once when she has moved but won’t again. I send him videos he doesn’t comment. I sit and tell him to look at her kicking, he just says oh yeah. I have appointments every week as I’m high risk and scans every fortnight. He’s been to 2 scans this whole pregnancy right at the start, hasn’t been to any appointments with me. I was in overnight one night and he didn’t even come with me to get checked out. I’ve done ALL the shopping for the baby, he’s had no input. He’s out most nights after work for a couple of hours having a beer. He never comments on how I feel or asks. I mean I don’t think it’s normal but some men are different I suppose 🤣 He’s more of a ‘when she’s here I’ll be interested’ kind of man

I think every part of this reply is perfect

All of these questions could factor into why he is being a bit distant

My DH was very interested, but he is a sappy git 😂 was the pregnancy planned? Only ask because if not maybe he's freaking out and it's coming across like he doesn't care

I'm 39 weeks with our 1st it took 12 years of IVF so a lot of money, heartache and tears before this little one decided to stick around. DH has come to scans but has probably felt baby kick twice when I've told him to, I bought him a book that he hasn't read and we have done 2 online antenatal classes where he spent most of the time on his phone. I have absolutely no doubt that as soon as baby is here he will be besotted and will step up but I think some men just find it hard to connect it does bother me but forcing them to be involved just makes it seem false imo.

This! X

Mine did. He found it a bit of an abstract concept when I was early in pregnancy but he read a pregnancy for dads book, and was interested in development updates and what it could do now, and the size comparisons! He enjoyed feeling him move, I think.

He’s much the same now DS is here, really. He’s always interested in the developmental updates and what DS is learning now. He’s a great Dad 🥰

I presume he’d be the same the second time around, but I’m sure there would also be anxiety about birth as the first did not go well, and perhaps those updates don’t hold the same appeal the second time around? I’m not sure. Is he otherwise interested?

No mine isn't (and)

There's no 'normal'. Tell him if you're bothered! I think it's pretty abstract for partners TBH, mine said that. Are you planning to attend antenatal classes? Mine is very keen to do this, more than me, so I think this will be the point where he engages more. it's still pretty early days for you.

Mine isn't hugely interested until they are a few months old and laughing, smiling and interacting, and more so once they are crawling and toddlers.
I think especially during pregnancy it can be hard for men to feel very involved. They don't have all the physical changes which we have to make it forefront in our minds constantly.

We had our third recently. My DH was less engaged in the bump moving and development, etc. He was more focused on making sure my water bottle was full, that I'd eaten, taking the older DC after work so I could have breaks etc.

Is he supportive in other ways just not the way that you would prefer?

Mine is very involved (we are only at 12 weeks!). He strokes my stomach when we watch tv, smiles at it when I come out of the shower, and cradles it when we sleep. He is super soppy in general and will touch me multiple times through the day e.g. hand on my lower back, cuddles, shoulder rubs, hand holds... That's just who he is. If you're concerned you can chat to him about it! You can ask him to put lotion on your bump when you get out of the shower and he might get used to the idea of touching it/being more involved.