7 weeks and so depressed

[ThisBrickBalonz]

I’m 7 weeks pregnant with a much wanted 3rd baby. I feel like my life has gone to absolute sh1t ever since. I feel really low all the time as well as anxious. I’m not anxious about the baby though, haven’t felt interested in booking a scan or home Doppler etc. stuff i usually do to relax like painting or reading I have zero interest in anymore.

I got offered a very serious promotion on the day I found out I was pregnant which I haven’t started yet and already have a very demanding job (I work in investment management) and have felt like I can’t perform since pregnant as my brain is fried. My family rely heavily on my income, I am the breadwinner.

i’ve requested an appointment with BPAS (abortion) already which is so strange as I really really wanted this baby. But all I can think about is getting rid of it now. Planning on getting the pills then seeing how I feel. I so want another baby but this isn’t feeling right. Is this hormones?

Oh op, I could have written your post a few weeks ago, you are in similar position to me.
I'm also pregnant with my third although it was not planned, I'm also in a senior position at work and the main breadwinner.
Since finding out I was pregnant I've been in complete meltdown mode, like seriously crying most days and feeling so down, anxious and depressed. The first trimester has not been kind to me, both mentally and physically and I've been referred to the perimental health team to try and deal with some of my anxiety and troubling thoughts.

I had my 12 week scan on Tuesday and I do feel better since, I seem to be fine during the day but in the evenings when I'm sat down chilling I'm still having an internal wobble. I can't tell you if this is hormones or if you are doubting your own decisions but I just want to reach out and say you are not alone. Obviously I have decided to go ahead with the pregnancy but whatever you decide will be absolutely what's right for you.

I think it could be hormones. I was pregnant with an IVF baby and I felt very low in the first 9 weeks despite it being an absolute miracle I had succeeded in conceiving! By 12 weeks I felt quite different. I suspect you will feel worse if you terminate for the reasons you give now, taking into account you said it was a much wanted baby.
The finances may have a bit of flex especially with a third, baby things are already bought and despite what pessimists might say, there are economies of scale. Very best wishes.

Pregnancy IS a protected characteristic - your workplace has to make reasonable adjustments whether that's unpaid parental leave or time off for appointments or antenatal support. If you were depressed or unwell for another reason the same would apply, surely, and YOU would come first not work pressures.

I totally resonate with this.. it’s very hard! I clearly remember pacing up and down pushing my 1 year old in a pram while pregnant with my second and just couldn’t shake the misery. Although he was planned for and very much wanted, I just felt miserable. My husband and I didn’t really talk about the new baby, I wasn’t worried about it, life just passed by with me feeling rubbish about it. BUT at the 12 week scan, it all stopped. I saw the baby on the screen and it was like a switch and I felt so much better and started to look forward to his arrival. I’m sure it was hormones and overwhelm and I do hope it’s the same for you. He’s now the light of my life!

Hi OP,

when I fell pregnant (albeit my first) I was 2 years into my absolute dream job that I had worked so hard for and was flying. I had no idea how much pregnancy would affect me. I was know for being a bit hard faced but one day had this almighty crying and spluttering breakdown at work saying I didn’t want to be there anymore. The truth of it was I wasn’t performing as well and I hated that feeling. Close friends and family would say ‘it’s only a job’ but for me it was part of my identity and the sum of the years of work I’d invested. I think it’s really normal if you’re a carer focused person to feel at odds with being pregnant. I hated the whole thing and to be honest it wasn’t until baby was here that everything kind of felt right. My DS is now 19 weeks and he is the absolute light of my life. However I am not returning to work for a few reasons I won’t go into here but practically it just wouldn’t work. There are days I feel really sad about that but I’ve just worked on accepting this is a new chapter of my life now.

of course an abortion is absolutely your choice but after reading you really wanted this pregnancy I think you need to really reflect on what you actually want. Could you perhaps consider a session with a counsellor who can help unpack things for you? I personally find that too hard to do with someone I know. X

Hey @ThisBrickBalonz my last pregnancy was unplanned baby number 5, i dont work but i have a seriously busy home life with disabled children and disabled OH so as you can imagine alot relies on me being at my best mentally and physically, so when i found out i was pregnant it was scary knowing i wouldn’t be able to perform at my best and that the household might suffer, i seriously came very close to abortion in the early weeks, like you my anxiety went through the roof and i even had a couple of minor panic attacks which ive never had before, my OH didn’t want another baby so that was difficult and when we told my eldest son 11 he cried (not happy tears), but i struggled through and was even struggling with the idea of another baby during labour, but oh my god was she worth it, literally love at first sight, she is now 5 months old and adored by everyone in the house, couldn’t imagine life without her now xx